After Life

         We live our lives filling our brains with memories, memories of joy and memories of pain. Humans are unique animals; we have the ability to transfer the action we take in our lives into memories. Humans are unique animals because we can not control the memories we take with us, sure we all have memories we want to forget, those “I can’t believe I did that” moments and memories we want to keep forever, those “I’ll remember this moment for all eternity” thoughts. But over time even the best memories fade into new memories and we become the people we are because of those memories. Humans are unique animals, after all we consider our memories our most prize possessions. But what if when we move between earth and eternity we have to choose one memory? What would it be?

         Standing here at the point between life and eternity I’ve been given this choice. I knew this moment was coming, I’ve known all my life what waited for me at the end. I have seen first hand what this choice can do to people. I’ve seen people who are driven insane by their choice of one memory and now I struggle with this decision. But I have the upper hand because I knew I would have to play this game. I know the secret because I too have been the master. As I stand there staring this cold dark figure in the eye, he waits. The master waits for me to make my decision. He can see inside me that I won’t allow myself the torture of the decision. Choose to quickly and you take the chance of choosing poorly. That poor choice slowly driving you insane with the constant inner nag of “I can’t believe I did that during my life.” Choose to slowly and you will be tortured with the idea that you chose poorly, even when the master knows you chose the best memory to relive in the afterlife.

         I stand at the gate with the master waiting for my decision. His blank stare prodding me for an answer, do I choose my first day of school, my first date, or my first kiss? Do I choose the day I was married or the birth of my child? I relieved my life through my memories while standing there procrastinating on my choice. I discovered, or is it remembered, that I lived a happy healthy life. I had friends that loved me, and a family that wanted me around. I married a man who wanted no other woman than me and we raised a smart and inquisitive little girl who became a woman loved by her children. I remembered my entire life while I was standing at the gate, the joys of the love and even the joys of the pain. The “I can’t believe I did that” moments quickly unfolded into moments where I grew as a person, moments where I learned something important about myself or my loved ones. My memories made me alive, they made me a person and I remembered why I chose to submit myself to this finite life giving up my post as a gatekeeper for what we considered as living with the unwashed masses. I was more than simply a person moving from one experience to another, I was a person creating memories for myself and the others around me.

         At that minute I realized what the gatekeepers have always wanted someone to learn. The memory I choose doesn’t matter, for I will continue on in the memories of the people I have touched. I will live on in the memories of my friends, my husband, my child, my grandchildren and yes I will live on in the memories of my enemies as well. As a smile washed over my face I opened my eyes looked at my gatekeeper and muttered, “I’ve chosen.”

         In a flash, I am transported to my memory. I awaken to find myself lying on my deathbed surrounded by those who love me. Not only can I feel my own sprit slowly slipping from my body but I am acutely aware of my surroundings. My senses are awake and aware of things I didn’t notice the first time. The light breeze blowing outside causes the curtains to flap and a coolness to surround the room. The blanket covering my frail body drapes my figure while protecting me from the coolness of the room. The quiet stillness of the room is not broken by my loved ones. No one is crying as I slip into sleep and move toward this gate. For in this brief moment the people in the room know I have lived a happy life and I will live on in their memories. I understand this now and will relive my final days surrounded by the people I love for the eternity that is considered the after life.