pessimistic veiws

anger
this soul is scared with anger
this life is full of pain
always wandering with no destination
my soul wanders
never staying to long long or too little
it won't stop untill it finds
finds a place it fits
the perfect place to fit
a place were it belongs
where at last it can be at peace
with itself and the world
until the pain
the suffering and the anger is gone
no longer outcasted from society
but accepted for the way it is
when that will be
i do not know
only one person might know
the amighty father
hopefully has ceated a place where at last i can rest
be at peace with my existance and surroundings
until then i shall wander
never staying too long
or too little
a flicker of existance
if i find a mate
we shall wander together
until we have reached
our final destination
were we can find serenity
were these puzzle peices can fit
paradise
such an idealistic word
wandering is my destiny
alone or with someone
i will never know were
but i shall get there
till i have no need to wander
until then i'll embrace the bumps
because one day the fog will lift and at the end will be paradise
i don't know were it will be
in this life or the next
will i wander until i die
or will i wander after death?
am i destined to wander for ever?
is there no place for me on earth?
will the place i nastalgicaly call paradise
be hell, pergitory or other christian places of the after life?
those are questions that no one can answer
but when i finnaly reach my destination
for the first time i'll be free and truly happy
but for now i wander
and wander
drifting from place to place
a ghost on earth

You hide your true feelings
embarassed to show care
truly warm inside
but refuse to love
to feel
you were a tearless mask
made up of anger
hatred and torture
hurt people for fun
people hurt you
they make you feel pain
they insult and laugh
point fingers at you
it truly hurts but you refuse
you brush them off and make them feel worse
you harm to cover up your weakness
you hide your true identity
with a cold hatered mask
ashamed of being kind and warm
your just afraid
fraid to show your true self
your just insecure
not tough
just insecure

You say so many things
so tangled up in your lies
your life is a lie
are all lives lies?
whats the piont
the point of working
working your ass off to make something of yourself
then suddenly you die
whats the piont
the point of anything
sooner or later we're all going to die

Why do we love?
love is pointless
all love causes pain
pain and suffering
eventually someone will love you
but why?
if love is so painful
why do we love?

Blue is like a tear drop
a tear drop rolling down
down my check
and into my lap
it reminds me
reminds me of a cold rainy day
it makes me want to dissapear
dissapear from this world into the next
away I go
sorring away
and never comming back
that is blue

Why do we live?
all life is does is give you pain
pain anger and suffering
why do we suffer?
do we suffer to live
to live for pain and anger
but why?
why do we live?

Suicide
A weak mans excuse
to get away from the pain
the suffering life brings
but at times its so tempting
does that make us weak
or strong for over comming the temptation

You try to talk
but no words are spoken
you try to cry
but no glistening drops come out
you try to walk
but no steps are taken
you try to breath
but your air is gone
the time stoped ticking
and your candle goes out

If i die today will you care?
if i die tommoro will you cry?
i would not
why you ask?
it's not worth it
nothing is
life is a joke
a cruel joke
played on all
so don't cry
laugh and ceebrate that another cruel joke is over