Week One - Washington DC

May 23rd, 2005
Dear Shelley,
I am going to kill my sister. I tell you this only so that you will know who the unidentified body is when it turns up in the river.
This has been quite a trip. As you know, I am traveling with my 96-year old grandmother, who is in a wheelchair, and my younger sister Rachel, who is slightly crippled. We had a great time visiting our cousins in Virginia Beach. Then going on to West Virginia, to visit relatives there.
Yesterday we arrived in Washington, DC on the train, and I was so excited to actually be in the nation’s capital. We only planned to be here three days, and we had the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History, the Jefferson Memorial, Lincoln Monument, and the National Air and Space Museum on our itinerary. I especially wanted to see the Air and Space Museum, as I love astronomy, and also am a great sci-fi fan.
Well, you know what they say. “Wish you were here.” Actually, I don’t. So far I have not been impressed with this city. It is very dirty here. I am quite surprised that the capital of our country is so dirty! And the people I have met here have not been nice. When I asked the cabby last night to help me with my grandmother’s wheelchair, he said, “If you want it in the trunk, put it there yourself,” and he quickly got back into his cab, leaving me standing there. What could I do but lift it in myself. My grandmother and sister were already in the car. Of course, getting help from my sister is like pulling teeth. It is next to impossible.
This morning we arrived at the Smithsonian’s Museum of Natural History’s front entrance, only to find about 10 million steps. Normally I can handle steps with the wheelchair, but I wasn’t sure I could do that many. The doorman smirked and said, “The wheelchair entrance is in the back.”
Do you have any idea how many blocks we had to walk to get to the back entrance?” Well, we did finally get around there after walking a long, long, really long way! I was exhausted.
The only redeeming thing was the Museum itself. Wow! I was really impressed. I love museums, and this had to be the ultimate museum experience for me. We did see the Hope Diamond. Oh, man!!! I would have loved to have just held it in my hand, just for a moment. It was truly beautiful, and huge!!! I couldn’t believe the size of it!
After the tour, we cruised through the gift shop, where I found a giant size, 50th Anniversary Edition of “Scruffy the Tugboat”. Of course, I had to have a copy. This was the first book I ever remember reading by myself, and I have always loved it. Being the book lover that I am, I know I will treasure this.
The day was going fine until I noticed that my sister had disappeared. Now my sister is thirty something years old, and certainly capable of taking care of herself. But to my grandmother, she is still the baby of the family. And of course, grandmother was frantic. While she is normally easy to travel with, at 96 she does get a little freaked out at times. And this was one of those times. I couldn’t really put in a missing persons report. I mean she had only been gone for an hour or so. I didn’t quite know what to do. But in order to keep my grandmother quiet, and at least partially sane, I checked all the bathrooms, the gift shops, and the food areas. No sister. Maybe she got bored and went outside. We made our way back to the “back entrance” and went outside. No sign of a sister. We then proceeded to walk up and down. We walked all the way from the Jefferson Monument to the Lincoln Memorial. I would not recommend doing this pushing a wheelchair on a hot day.
Finally I realized we were not going to find her like this. It was getting on towards evening, so I persuaded my grandmother to head back to the hotel. Rather than try and find a cab, we just walked, and arrived back there around 6 PM, hungry and tired. Well, you can imagine my surprise when who should we find there but my less than wonderful sister, just relaxing and having a good old time. And where had she been? She went to the NASA building. And she couldn’t wait to throw it in my face. “I went to see the Air and Space and you didn’t get to see it!”
Yes, Shelley, right at that moment I could have killed her with my bare hands!!!! She has been impossible this whole trip. Well, you know what? No one forces her to go on these all expense paid trips with us. Why didn’t she just stay home? I would have been more than happy. This is not the first time she has pulled a stunt like this on a vacation, but I SWEAR this will be the LAST TIME I ever travel with her. I was absolutely FURIOUS!!!
When they dredge that body out of the river, grandmother and I will be home. But just in case anyone wonders who it is, you will know. I hope we have better luck on the next leg of the trip.
Until then, Cynaemon
Note: This is a true story, except I didn’t actually kill my sister. I sure wanted to. I don’t think I will ever forgive her for what she did that day. She has been back to DC a number of times, and has visited the Air and Space Museum each time. I have yet to see it.