What I am

I am everything to me
Yet I mean nothing at all
I am contradictory on all terms
You dare to ask me who I am
But if I tell you
Could you possibly understand
I doubt it
Because I don't
I am loving and hateful
All in the same breath
I am neither lover nor fighter
But I am my very best
I can cry for no reason
Or cry no at all
For what makes you cry us big
And what makes me cry is small
I laugh at the jokes
That I find funny
But what I find funny
You think it's a joke
I am a tremendous sinner
Yet I have great faith
I make my own choices
But I cannot change or decide my fate
I take what I cannot give
And give what I cannot take
Because what you
Give away so easily
I find hard to do
And what I can give away
Is too complicated fro you
I can smile and frown
All in the same breath
Because when you see me smiling
I am frowning inside
That is not all I am
There is much more to behold
But to know me as em
You need more than to just be told
Remember that I am
Contradictory on all terms
One trait is not without the other
Love me as I am
And you will soon
Know it all
Because I am everything to me
Yet I mean nothing all