Fantasy Persona vs. Real Personality

Fantasy Persona vs. Real Personality: and Introspective Look

Thanks a lot, Elkor. Reading your auto-biographical and introspective piece inspired me to write my own. Dammit!! You know me. You know I can take an idea and run with it until it expands into a giant project that attaches itself to the ever growing list in my brain and wont go away! (A prime example of the above mentioned running with an idea was taking Chris’s few page short story - itself taken from the phrase “what would happen if Orcs invaded Sid-Richardson?” - and blew it up into a novel or three idea.)

Right now this is what’s on my plate: I have Issues (no, really, that’s the class name). I have a field experience in archives. I have teaching responsibilities at Tang Soo Do. I have comprehensive exams looming. Oh, and a full-time job. This is hardly meant to be a comparison to other’s lives or anything like that, but boy do I have no time. At least this would be a piece of work (my first posted on the web) that will be much shorter than the seven novel Daughter of the Elements series I intend to one day write down.

First off, a bit of explanation. If any of you out there have read Elkor’s stuff - and if you haven’t, go do so! (Look Elkor! Free publicity!) - you may have noticed my handle name is Aurora. Yes, that one. I was - and still am - the voice that gives life to the persona of Aurora Stormwind, druid of the Northern Circle, born in the Mirithal Woods, child of the Banned One, and original member of the cartographers turned adventuring group The Riders. She was my first role-playing character, and she is still my favorite. (Adrianna Aldino is currently running second.)

Perhaps ironically I was not originally intending to play a druid. I had wanted to be a different kind of magic user: a sorceress. Unfortunately for me (or fortunately depending on how you look at it), that role had already been taken. (Hi, Josephine!)

So, why did I choose a druid? Well, first I wanted to be a magic user because to me that is what is the essence of fantasy and what makes it different from, say, historical role-playing. It lends mystique to a world that you create and experience together with your character and truly makes it a place where anything can happen. So, after a sorceress was discovered to have been taken, why a druid? Well, honesty, I wanted to use the name Aurora and that class just seemed to fit the name. The Stormwind part of it came later. I suppose a better question might be why did I (and do I still) enjoy playing a druid so much? To explore that, let’s explore how she and I differ as well as how we are the same. We will revisit this question at the end of this monologue.

Aurora and myself obviously grew up in very different circumstances. (I can almost see ya’ll out there going “No kidding”.) I don’t mean the magic or turning oneself into animals by a means other than a Halloween costume. Aurora grew up with just her mother and the circle of druids. Her mother passed away when she was thirteen, and the circle took over her care. She was nineteen when she first ventured out of the woods and joined the Riders. I, on the other hand, was raised by both parents in a good-sized city. I was 14 when I first ‘ventured out’, leaving my small private school for a much larger public high school. (And boy was I glad I did. But that’s anther story.)

Aurora never knew her father - for reasons she didn’t find out about until she was nearly twenty. Her mother never really talked about him either; whatever had happened was obviously a very painful subject and one Elianora couldn’t even share with her own offspring. I, on the other hand, always knew my father, and while I did loose him (well after Aurora was created), mom and I have never been on edge when it comes to talking about him.

Aurora has a love in her life. While he may be from a different country (duchy, actually), and thus not often near her side, they are very much in love. True, the fighter and heir to the throne of Straum might be an odd match for our Mirithal Woods raised druid, but, well, what can you do? Such is the strange nature of love. I, however, have no love of my life. Yet. You see, while I remain single, I have yet to give up home. (Or stupid romantic notions, depending on who you ask. Remind me sometime to tell ya’ll about myself and three friend’s ‘let’s sue Disney’ idea.) Much like Aurora watches for her Captain Straum, I also remain Evangeline under the oak. (Louisiana legend reference. Check it out for details.) Only I’m not waiting for Gabriel; I’m waiting for a Gabriel. Or my Gabriel, if you prefer. I’m not going into details of the story here, but if you read it you’ll get the idea.

Even despite our different circumstances, Aurora and I have many similarities. And yea, I realize I’m talking about her as if she were a friend. I think it’s like in writing when you ‘get to know’ your characters. They may not be actual people, but you know them nonetheless. They are the friends who are always going to be with you.

Woolgathering. Sorry. Back to our regularly scheduled rambling monologue.

Both Aurora and I are relative introverts. Aurora, upon meeting the Riders, hardly spoke at all. She said maybe her name and where she was from that first night. It was only later that she would begin to bond with Josephine, Farrim, Crevecour, and later Rune. Even after all her experiences, she’s still pretty quite upon meeting new people.

With few exceptions, I am very much the same way. I can’t honestly say why I’m shy around people; that’s just the way it is.

Both of us are slow to anger, but when we do get mad, it is best to get out of our way - and fast!! Upon fighting an enemy at the Moot, Aurora - who had just learned said person had ordered her mother murdered - held her tongue. She did not yell, scream, rant, or become hysterical. She pointed at him and spoke only one word: “Burn”. She didn’t need to say anything else; the flames conveyed her fury just fine.

I don’t have the ability to set things on fire - too bad, because sometimes I’d very much like to. I can, however, explode at people in a different way. My best friend here where I live said something that - since I was already in a terrible mood - set me off to such an extend that I let loose in an e-mail rant that made Elkor (who saw it later) comment he was surprise she was still speaking to me.

Both Aurora and I are deeply loyal. We may be slow to offer up friendship, but once it is done, that friendship is there for good. Yes, space may strain it, but it stays nonetheless. We also regret deeply the loss of a friend. Aurora grieved deeply when Farrim and Crevecour were killed, but even more so when Rune had to be left behind in a pocked dimension after causing a distraction so the others could escape. She spent a great amount of time scrying for him until she finally learned he was alive. She then became determined to rescue him. Thankfully, I have never had a friend just up and disappear on me, but if it ever did, I have no doubt I would react the same way.

Both Aurora and myself also seem to possess an ability to become best friends with people who are very different from ourselves. Aurora counts among her best friends: a human cleric, a female sorceress, a dwarven fighter, and an elven monk. Combine with a human druid, and you have one strange mixture of folks. I count among my friends, Catholics, Republicans, Democrats, a couple of pagans, agnostics, and atheists. I think I’m the only Baptist in the bunch.

I hope this provided an interesting glimpse into my life. In a way, I’ve found, Aurora is me. Or rather, she is who I would have been had I been born into Elkor’s world. Hence, the reason I enjoy playing her so much.

Long Live the Riders!!!!