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Rated: 13+ · Short Story · Community · #885111
Contest entry for Writing.Com's Birthday Short Story Contest
Chapter 2


Best Laid Plans: Good Intentions & The Scheme of Things


“Next year you should apply for one of those meters so we don’t have to lick 300 stamps.” Betty said smacking her lips with a disgusting look on her face.

“What? Betty, those stamps were self-sticking, you didn’t need to lick them.” Betty looked like she was going to cry. “When was the last time you wrote a letter and mailed it?” Gail asked.

“I e-mail everybody, and I pay my bills online. Why do I need stamps?” Betty said defensively.

“It’s a lost art, letter writing. I know everybody thinks I am just paranoid, but I am truly worried about all this online bill pay stuff. There are no controls. You have no idea who can gain access to your…”

“Yea…Yea…Blah…Blah…Blah… I don’t want to get into that right now. Have we covered all the bases for the party?” Betty quizzed Gail hopping to distract her by changing the subject back to the matter at hand.

“I added peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to the list of sandwiches the caterers are going to be making for the party.” Betty said casually.

“Oh Betty, Rick hates peanut butter and jelly. We just have to be absolutely sure he doesn’t get any on his plate during the festivities.” Gail said not too terribly concerned.

“And I sent out invitations to all the guys and their wives on the rooster at the local Army retirees hall, too.” Betty said proudly. “Thought Rick would like to spend time swapping war stories with his old army buddies.”

“YOU DID WHAT?” Gail shouted, unable to control herself.

“There is enough food. What did I do wrong?” Betty asked stunned by Gail’s reaction to her announcement. She thought Gail would have thought it was a wonderful idea.

“Rick was in the Coast Guard for those 30 years, not the Army, Betty.” Gail moaned, her head in her hands. “Any chance we can retrieve those invitations?”

Betty sat silent, wanting to dissolve into thin air like a puff of smoke, and knowing that she couldn’t undo this major blunder was almost unbearable. “What have I done? I am so sorry, Gail. I didn’t mean…”

“Never mind that, THINK. What can we do?” True to form, Gail immediately snapped into her problem-solving mode. All those years of raising all those children certainly helped Gail develop and perfect her problem-solving skills.

I am getting too old for this. My life is supposed to be getting easier. This was supposed to be fun. Gail stressed silently to herself; the whole time blaming herself for relying so heavily on her friend to help her.

Betty was more confident Gail would think of something than Gail was of herself.

“It’s too late to just cancel the party. We don’t have time to uninvited guest, and that would be really rude, too” Gail’s eyes were beginning to roll in opposite directions. “Miss Manners, and Dear Abbey never covered a situation like this."

Suddenly Gail jumped up, “I’ve got it. We have just enough time if we personally deliver the invitations ourselves.”

“What?” Betty asked stunned.

“We are going to invite all of the Navy and the Coast Guard retired guys and their wives, too. Quick, call the caterers and order more food and drinks. I’ll call the D.J., and tell him to adjust his play list to include tunes to cover the different military branches that will now be attending."

“What quick thinking Gail. You are so smart.” Betty quipped in amazement at her best friends plan, and delighted that there was a solution after all.

“Now, who’s crazy, Betty? I’ll need to alert the police. It’s going to be a blood bath. You’ve never been anywhere to see what happens when you mix the different military service units, have you?” Gail said, her face twisted and bunched with a horrible expression of impending diaster.

“But they’re grown men, not young soldiers, Gail”

“And you really think that will make a difference. These men are all long-term veterans, died in the wool, dedicated to whatever branch of service they were in. I promise you, it is going to be nothing short of a riot like this town has ever seen, Betty”

“Are you really going to call the police, Gail?”

“No, not really. Chief Bob is a retired Air Force Colonel, and that fact is just going to be more fuel on the fire in the end. Now, where are those invitation, we have to get busy.”

“I am so glad I found out I don’t have to lick more stamps.” Betty said, and they both laughed.

“Rick is going to be absolutely miserable.” Gail said, as they were finishing up the last of the invitations.

“Huh? Then why are we doing all this?” Betty asked looking totally confused.

“It’s the perfect solution to introduce him to the brand, spanking new camper that I have purchased.”

“Gail, you are evil. How is an Empty Nester’s party going to get Rick to let you keep a camper?”

“He has a huge phobia about crowds. And the more people who attend, the more likely it is he will stow away in the camper, and once inside he will discover that it is a welcome, comfortable escape from the maddening crowds. The Municipal Auditorium is perfect, too. It is big enough to park the camper inside. I bought a big red bow from a car dealership, you know the bows the dealerships display on the new cars at Christmas. This will be perfect. I’ll have him ~~ hook, line and sinker.”

“Do you ever stop scheming?” Betty asked relatively confident that Gail’s plan would work, after all none had ever failed that she knew about.


~~~


Written for
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And the prompt:

In planning for your party, you have overlooked only one thing, something you remember at the last and worst possible moment.

The person you are throwing the party for has an irrational fear, or phobia, of something or someone that is present at the party.

You haven't surprised your "birthday person" yet, but it is too late to call the party off and you are going to have to figure out some way to hide or conceal the offending item or person until the end of the party.

What are you going to do?


In this chapter, just make sure you clearly indicate who or what the phobia involves and what you are trying to do about it. The rest is all up to your imagination!


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