I Love Him Still

He belittled me while unwinding my flesh.
Out of this he found a thrill.
He told me of hurtful truths he kept.
Somehow I love him still.
He leaves me to my thoughts of him even if I hate them so.
Though many bring me tears of when he wouldn't let me go.
I can tell you that I hated him for whenever came until.
But however long ago that was I do love him still.
My innocence slashed and fantasies clashed with his man like prideful will.
Years I've been drained my hope stays maintained.
Older now I love him still.
I've never received a diamond or anything resembling his care.
Just a lifetime of what if's and him always being there.
Even when I left him in his guilt he warmed up to my chill.
Lusting after a woman who hates to love him still.
I never asked for this to be any of it's one million crazy ways.
I just wanted someone to miss and who would love me always.
I told him what he does and how easy him I could kill.
He laughed and kissed me wet.
God help me, I love him still.