Spencer Speaks

So I think that reality T.V. has hit an all new "low."(You’ll understand my pun in a minute.) I’m talking about a new reality show that is almost exactly like "The Bachelor." It has one single guy looking for a wife, various single ladies looking for a husband, and cheesy suspenseful music throughout for dramatic affect. The one thing that makes this show unique is: all the contestants are midgets! I just about crapped my pants when I saw it. At first I thought that it was a complete joke because to me nothing is funnier than parodies about T.V. shows that use midgets, but I soon realized that it was actually a real show. It’s called "The Littlest Groom" and it can be seen on Fox Monday nights. If the title isn’t enough to tell you what the point of the show is. It’s basically a midget version of "The Bachelor." Apparently the public appeal of watching midgets is still pretty strong in our society which tries its hardest to be politically correct. I mean seriously, I’ll probably get a lot of flack for using the term "midgets" and not "dwarves." But it's perfectly okay for us to watch and laugh at a bunch of midgets as they go on dates and try to hook up with each other. Apparently that's PC. Actually, if I were a midget I’d feel a lot more degraded being called a dwarf than a midget. When I hear "dwarf," I think of Snow White and her seven short companions with their funny shoes and pointy hats. We might as well call them "munchkins" if were going to be cute about it. So anyway, back to my point about this show. Obviously this show is trying to bank off of our secret desire as a society to be politically incorrect. T.V. and Hollywood have already incorporated midgets to get the appeal of the public. Don’t believe me? Then let’s do it: "Snow White and the Seven Dwarves" "Wizard of Oz" "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" "Different Strokes" "Willow" "Jackass" "Happy Gilmore" "Seinfeld" "The Lord of the Rings Trilogy" They all benefited from having midgets in them. No doubt the show itself has sparked outrage from numerous people saying that it is a degrading show that exploits the handicap of a group of people. I just think it’s a retarded idea that depends solely on the premise that people will watch midgets because they think they’re funny. Sadly, they will. And if you think about it, after a while, if people start to really like the show, they’ll come out with midget versions of other reality shows. Could you see a "Midget Survivor" in Disneyland, or "Midget Fear Factor" or "Midget Idol" or "Midget Big Brother" aka "Little Brother?" Or how about a midget prank show on MTV called "Dwarfed," or a show that shows regular people what it’s like to be a midget called "Short Eye for the Tall Guy?" As you can see the possibilities are endless. So if you like watching midgets try to hook up with each other than I would definately make an effort to watch them this Monday on Fox. If your like me and think the Fox network is really grasping straws with this idea, just wait till their next hairbrain attempt at a new reality show. Who knows, maybe they'll take Paris Hilton and make her live in Provo for six weeks. I think that would be a pretty funny reality show.

-Spencer