Me, Me and More Me

I am many people. I am counselor, advisor, teacher, and listening ear. I am known to many and friend to few. I am a dichotomy, both optimistic and pessimistic, hard working and lazy, as well as dependable and irresponsible. My imagination is both the bane of my existence and my greatest joy. No one can match my temper, but I can be passionately loving as well.

Possessed of ingenuity and persistence, I have survived some hard knocks. I have more lives than a cat and a tendency to land on my feet. I love words and knowledge for its own sake. Someday, I will actually win a trivia contest. I wish I was much more than I am.

My dark side often threatens to overpower me and for that reason I must spend a great deal of time alone. No one will ever be allowed to plumb the depths of that darkness. I am suspicious of others and play my cards carefully. I have a tendency to hedge my bets. My greatest fear is that I will be dismissed as unimportant.

I love nature, but I adore modern convenience and make a terrible camper. Planning and circumventing hassles is a big deal to me. Spontaniety is difficult. Excitement is good as long as there are no unpleasant surprises.

I am always reinventing myself and may be someone different tomorrow. I like to do the unexpected, for which I have a plan, of course. I am not and never have been young. I was always ahead of most people and the times. Every once in a while, life is simple and I know everything. Every once is a while, life is wonderful and I don't know anything.

It is difficult to know me. It is hard to love me, and it is impossible to understand me. Do I know myself very well? Do I understand my limits? Have I done enough and can I accept who I am? I hope not, because when I've done that, what's left?