a combination of thoughts about a man I talked to on line for a year |
They walked along the beach. She fit under his arm as if that place were made for her... a temporary home, familiar and unfamiliar at the same time... They had shared so much, first in words against pictures, then in words alone. Voices now and then to prove each really existed and common thoughts that were not a surprise when mentioned by either. He found her in her deepest point of introspection, watched her struggle, held out a hand at times to let her know there was a calm to be had if she needed it enough. She reached for that hand and felt it hold her a bit longer each time until it was like a cotton filled cradle. She knew even as the cradle rocked it would not tip over because the hand was steady and he took care to sooth her as she shifted restlessly at times. Slowly he slipped in under her walls, giving her a place to feel each tremor that threatened to tip her world. He stood quietly by, reaching to her at points where she knew she was alone to let her know that she was not alone. A soft voice when her nerves were stretched tight, slipping in to let her know that the stress was a reflex she could soon learn to control. That once she learned to control it there would be few times it would peek at her from behind the velvet curtain of his tenderness. Her journey continues, taking her along another road. No pressure to feel anymore than she does, no need to look farther than the moment. The physical touching they will soon share is anticipated by both and will be a gift they give unselfishly to each other but it will be no more important than the touching they have done until now. It will be an extension of that place they found in each other's lives. This part of the journey may be long or short in the obvious definition but will live within her forever. It is the part that gave her permission and time to relax for a while, to just feel, knowing that the feelings were accepted and returned. No strings or trading promises for the sake of a future that would forever be uncertain. The moment... that is the gift... And the water slid quietly to the sand and retreated. They walked in knowing silence that this moment would be with them each time either needed to rest.... |