Rescued by vanadium (Winner, Cramp!)

"Why didn't someone warn me?" the Captain had his hands over his forehead and he was groaning. "We can't even send them back."

"That would be most unwise, sir," his deputy replied. "Most unpopular and most expensive."

"What are we to do?" the Captain asked, not looking up. "So many challenges we've faced and won, and this one beats us!"

"Have hope, my Captain," the deputy uttered, with hardly any hope himself.

Just then, there was a sound at the opening of the tent. Someone was clapping, asking to enter.

"Enter," muttered the deputy, and the Chief Explorer stepped into the tent, smiling.

"Salutations, my Captain," he said, standing to attention with his head bent a bit as he was taller than the tent, "you will be glad to know we Explorers have solved your problem."

Captain and Deputy sat up, thrilled. "You mean that?"

"Yes, sir and sir. We put on our gravity-adjusters and walked all over this Red Planet, sir, and we have the answer."

"And what is the answer?" the Captain squeaked.

"Vanadium, my Captain, vanadium."

"What's vanadium?"

"To quote the great Earth scientist, Robert Waltz, On the Periodic Table, the element with atomic number 23 (23 protons in each nucleus) is vanadium, which is given the chemical symbol V."

"Well, what's it got to do with anything?"

"We Explorers have discovered some here on Mars, sir. And we can use it ..."

"You can use it to make earrings, necklaces, bracelets, toys and cooking utensils?" the Captain asked, excited.

"YES!"

"Well, then, we can have what the First Women on Mars want!"

There was another clapping sound at the tent opening.

"Enter," all three men yelled.

A young lady strode in. She didn't need to bend, she was the exact height of the tent. "Salutations, my Captain," she said.

"Salutation, dear First Lady of the First Women on Mars. We were just discussing your demand and our First Explorer has an answer."

"He does?"

"Yes, we can have a shopping center right here on Mars, thanks to the element with the atomic number 23!"

The First Lady of the First Women on Mars was a learned person. "You mean vanadium?"

"Yes, Madam First Lady, and we're going to directly make earrings, necklaces, bracelets, toys and cooking utensils out of it, in one easy step. No need to even make steel!"

"So we can have our First Shopping Mall, right here on Mars!"

"Hurray for vanadium!"