Paranoid

I ate too much sugar
I fear I might fall asleep in the water
Having thoughts of someone I never knew,
Something so reminiscent of my favorite shade of blue.

In my own time, I can't sit in stillness
Repetition above, me I believe in my illness
I only crave a warm body when everything is distorted
Only when I feel it won't be so morbid.

Everytime I feel jeopardized,
With every face I recognize
A deep lament spreads across my body
Never in my own skin have I felt so gaudy.

Im being pulled in a direction I did not choose
This big game we're all playing, I know I will lose
I'm down on my knees—
I'm down my luck, I'm begging you 'please.'