A situationship

When you like your best friend and they do not feel the same for you, you know that the friendship will never be the same once you walk away. That is why I don’t believe in forever. I believe in the moments that are created by two people. Those wonderful memories that will be there once everything else has been settled and gone. I hate the fact that I could not be as aloof as you were. The only thing I truly know is that I opened up your heart to new friendships. Which I should be grateful. But that is all I am, just a good friend. I am never anything else. I guess I am not good at anything else. Every time I meet someone I always give it my all and in the end I am loved for what I can give but never for who I am. It hurts and makes me wonder why I continue to try to find someone for me. Clearly I am the problem. I expect too much. No one wants anything anymore. Only what they can get out of it. And I refuse to be part of a situationship. I want so much more. I know what I must do in order to heal. I have to destroy our friendship. And when you walk away I have no other choice but to stop hoping, stop trying. This is why we will never be the same. In time things will get better. But for now, I will become your enemy. You will wake up one day and hate me. And I will learn to be okay with that. I will miss you Mi Amor. Good bye.

07/22/24