A New Found Appreciation for Doormats

Once upon a time I had sacrificed a part of myself to become what I was expected to be. Left to draw my own conclusions based on information that I had stolen from whispers behind closed doors. Treading lightly on the eggshells that were laid out before me and knowing that boundaries had been set although the words were never spoken. I lived my life somewhere between slow motion and action packed, although not at a comfortable median. The good was always incredible and could make me forget about how frightening the bad could get. Manipulation and control were things that I thought I would never believe in, however, the unapologetic half-truths kept me precisely where I was supposed to be. Tears and attempts at justifications came more often than smiles. Hopes crumbled and spirits were crushed and I watched while they blew away in the breeze. It was all encompassing and bordering on suffocation, but I always remained obedient. I was a weak and pathetic version of myself that I swore I’d never be. But that was once upon a time, now it’s just a story that I tell myself to keep things in perspective. I refuse to settle for less than I want or deserve.