chapter 13- Smoke Games

True story from 1981, chapter 13
[A work in progress]

We were making a trip to score a couple pounds of Jamaican ganja. A connection comes straight from the Angels motorcycle gang. After we scored and were on our way home, we had an encounter with Barney Fife.(character from the Andy Griffith show) Arrested! Then I had to call the man I scored from to come get us out and take us back to the car with the 2 lb. still in the trunk. We hoped.

One particular time, Darren showed up right about the time I got the call from Smitty. He offered a ride. We took off. Stopped for gas. Filled the cooler with beer. I rolled a few joints to smoke on the ride. We managed to get a pretty good buzz by the time we reached Smittys.


Darren and I leave Smitty's heading toward home. About halfway, we stopped to take a leak. We were out in the country. Just watering the grass. Weren't hurting anything. It was around 10:00 p.m.

Suddenly, this car comes in really fast. A short, dorky cop with an authority problem. He jumps out of the car and comes to my window.
The cop said, ”What y'all doing? Where are you from? Let me see your license & registration.
What's in that big cooler in your backseat? Y'all have been drinking! What do you have in the car? Open the trunk.”

I said, ”Wait a minute. We ain’t done nothing wrong. What are you looking for?”

He replies, ”I'm not just a traffic cop. I'm an investigator. Open that trunk !”

I answered, "Hey, this is Darren's mom's car. I have no idea what he's got in the trunk. Here's the keys.”

“Which key opens the trunk? These are not the right keys, where are they? If it's his mom's car, why are you driving? Well, I see he's too damn drunk.”. He said as he shined his flashlight in Darren's face. He opened the cooler in the back seat. Empty beer cans.

Darren had a buzz. He did good. He just smiled, didn't say a word. It was the best thing to do at the time. We were scared to death.

“I'm going to see what's in that trunk. I got back up on the way. We will open that trunk. By the way, I called your license, and they came back suspended.”

I replied, “What suspended? Why?”.

Barney said, "Well, I don't know. You tell me.”

Finally, a State Trooper pulls in. Barney Fife and him talked for a minute, then we were told to get in the trooper's car. Barney Fife left. The state trooper is a fairly nice guy. He takes us to the nearest county seat, the magistrate's office. We explained to him the circumstances. He said that he had also noticed that Barney Fife had an attitude. He had radioed the magistrate. So he met us, let me sign my own bond, and gave Smitty almost all my money. They asked if we had anyone we could call.

Well, I called Smitty; I didn't really know what to expect. We had just left his place with a couple pounds of Jamaican. Anyone would have had to think twice; could it be a set-up? About 30 minutes later, Smitty pulled in to give us a ride. Everything seemed okay; he took us back to Darren's car at the church. Luckily, no Barney.