Moving Space

I am constantly spinning through events that have already happened
I can't escape my past no matter how hard I try
These thoughts consume day and night I'd give anything to be normal

I remember more than I should from a young age
My friends often tell me it's a gift but I feel cursed
Every painful or embarrassing memory on a constant loop is no gift to me

But now with you gone most of what used to be happy thoughts are sad
I remember our inside jokes and your laugh and it kills me that you aren't here
Your nickname for me replays in my head and most days still makes me sob

You were too young to go you should be here still
Yet you were an addict and I had always thought you would go out the way you did
Overdose is a brutal thing and finding your body was the worst thing I've ever seen

I am stuck in a time loop of that day
Space moves around me but I stay still
I remember how your face looked when I found you and I wish it would go away

The scream that came out of me wasn't human and it still lives in my ears
You deserved more than this world could give you
I hope you move through space now and it doesn't circle you like it does me