The loudest scream

last weekend of this summer
scattered tears on the scribbled paper
ink on my wrists
imitating the happy times
unfolding the happy days i lived
wanting to revisit the dearest moments spent
could i still
smile through my eyes like a silly girl
maybe not
i let the good things start and end in my head
i’m not worthy enough to live them
i don’t regret any of the people i met
they all showed me to love and fear
i’m grateful for their love
i’m sorry i couldn’t give it back
i don’t know how to let out this
overwhelming feeling of guiltiness
so i scream
i scream so loud
everything goes blank for a second
that moment of quietness is worth
this time was
the loudest scream i ever let out
and…………
- blue’