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Rated: ASR · Script/Play · Tragedy · #2272990
I am rewriting Romeo and Juliet to be used more easily in a play.
Characters

Romeo
Juliet
Friar Lawrence
Mercutio
Juliet's Nurse
Tybalt
Montague
Lady Montague
Benvolio
Abraham
Capulet
Lady Capulet
Sampson
Gregory
Paris
Prince Escalus
Friar John
Balthasar
The Apothecary
Peter
The Chorus


Prologue

Chorus enters stage

Chorus Two households, both alike in dignity
(In fair Verona, where we lay our scene),
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
From forth the fatal loins of these two foes
A pair of star-crossed lovers take their life,
Whose misadventured piteous overthrows
Doth with their death bury their parents' strife.
The fearful passage of their death-marked love
And the continuance of their parents' rage,
Which, but their children's end, naught could remove,
Is now the two hours' traffic of our stage-
The which, if you with patient ears attend,
What here shall miss, our toil shall strive to mend.


Act 1, Scene 1

Sampson and Gregory of the Capulet house, enter stage carrying swords and shields.

Sampson Gregory, on my word, we shall not be humiliated. We will not take their garbage.

Gregory No, for then we should be garbage-men.

Sampson What I mean is, if they anger us we'll draw our swords.

Gregory Perhaps you should focus on staying out of trouble Sampson.

Sampson I strike quickly when angered.

Gregory But thou art not easily angered.

Sampson A dog of the house of Montague moves me.

Gregory To be angered is to stir, to be valiant is to stand. Therefore if thou art angered though runn'st away.

Sampson A dog of that house shall move me to stand. I will take the side closest to the wall of any man or maid of Montague's, and let him walk in the gutter.

Gregory That shows thee the weak one, for the weakest goes to the wall.

Sampson 'Tis true, therefore women, being the weaker vessels, are ever thrust to the wall. Therefore I will push Montague's men from the wall and thrust his maids to the wall.

Gregory The quarrel is between our masters and us their men.

Sampson It is all the same. I will show myself a tyrant. When I have fought with the men, I will be kind to the maids. I will cut off their heads.

Gregory You mean their maidenheads?

Sampson Ay, their heads, or their maidenheads. Take it in the sense thou wilt.

Gregory The women are the ones who must "sense" it.

Sampson They shall feel me as long as I can stand, 'tis known I am a pretty piece of flesh.

Gregory 'Tis well thou art not fish. If thou were, thou wouldst be dried and shriveled.

Abram and other Montague servingman enter

Draw thy sword! Here comes those of Montague.

Sampson My naked weapon is out. Quarrel! I will back thee.

Gregory How will thou back me? Turn thy back and run?

Sampson Worry not about me.

Gregory I do worry.

Sampson Let us take the law on our side. Let them start a quarrel.

Gregory I will frown as I pass by, they may react how they like.

Sampson Nay, as they dare. I will bite my thumb at them, which is a disgrace to them. if they bear it. (bites thumb)

Abram Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

Sampson I do bite my thumb, sir.

Abram Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

Sampson (aside to Gregory) Is the law on our side if I say "ay"?

Gregory (aside to Sampson) No.

Sampson No, sir. I do not bite my thumb at you, sir, but I do bite my thumb, sir.

Gregory Do you try and quarrel, sir?

Abram Quarrel, sir? No, sir.

Sampson But if you wish to quarrel, sir, I am your man. I serve as good a man as yours.

Abram He is no better than mine.

Sampson Well, sir.

Benvolio enters stage

Gregory (aside to Sampson) Say "better." Here comes one of my master's kinsmen.

Sampson (to Abram) Yes, "better," sir.

Abram You lie.

Sampson Draw your swords, if you be men. -Gregory, remember thy washing blow.

They fight

Benvolio (draws his sword) Part, fools! Put away your swords. You know not what you do.

Tybalt enters stage

Tybalt What, hast has thou drawn your sword to fight these worthless hinds? Turn thee, Benvolio. Look upon thy death.

Benvolio I do but try and keep the peace. Put away thy sword, Or manage it to part these men with me.

Tybalt What, your sword is drawn, and you talk of peace? I hate the word, as I hate hell, all Montagues, and thee. Have at thee, coward!

They fight
Three or four citizens enter stage with clubs or spears

Citizens Clubs, bills, and spears! Strike! Beat them down! Down with the Capulets! Down with the Montagues!

Capulet enters stage in his gown, with his wife, Lady Capulet

Capulet What noise is this? Give me my long sword, ho!

Lady Capulet A crutch, a crutch! Why call you for a sword?

Montague enters stage with a drawn sword, and his wife, Lady Montague

Capulet My sword, I say! Old Montague is come, and flourishes his blade to anger me.

Montague Thou villain Capulet! (Lady Capulet holds him back) Hold me not. Let me go.

Lady Montague Thou shalt not stir one foot to seek thy foe.

Prince Escalus enters stage with escort

Prince Rebellious subjects, enemies to peace,
Profaners of this neighbor-stainèd steel!—
Will they not hear?—What, ho! You men, you beasts,
That quench the fire of your harmful rage
With purple fountains issuing from your veins,
On pain of torture, from those bloody hands
Throw your mistempered weapons to the ground,
And hear the sentence of your angered prince.
Those with weapons throw them down
Three civil brawls, bred of simple word,
By thee, old Capulet, and Montague,
Have thrice disturbed the quiet of our streets
And made Verona's ancient citizens
Cast by their grave-beseeming ornaments,
To wield old weapons in their hands as old,
Cankered with peace, to part your cankered hate.
If ever you disturb our streets again,
Your lives shall pay the forfeit of the peace.
For this time, all the rest depart away.
You, Capulet, shall go along with me,
And, Montague, come you this afternoon
To know our farther pleasure in this case,
To old Free-town, our common judgment-place.
Once more, on pain of death, all men depart.

All exit except for Montague, the Lady Montague, and Benvolio

Montague Who set this ancient quarrel new abroach?
Speak, nephew. Were you by when it began?

Benvolio Here were the servants of your adversary,
And yours, were fighting ere I did approach.
I drew to part them. In the instant came
The fiery Tybalt, his sword prepared,
Which as he breathed defiance to my ears,
He swung about his head and cut the winds,
Who, nothing hurt withal, hissed him in scorn.
While we were interchanging thrusts and blows,
Came more citizens and fought on part and part,
Till the Prince came, who parted either part.

Lady Montague Oh, where is Romeo? Saw you him today?
Right glad I am he was not at this fray.

Benvolio Madam, an hour before the revered sun
Peered forth the golden window of the east,
A troubled mind brought me to walk abroad,
Where, underneath the grove of sycamore
That westward rooteth from this city side,
So early walking did I see your son.
Towards him I walked, but he was 'ware of me
And stole into the covert of the wood.
I, taking his affections for my own,
Which then most sought where most would not be found,
Being one too many by my weary self,
Pursued my humor not pursuing his,
And gladly left who gladly fled from me.

Montague Many a morning he hath here been seen,
With tears increasing the fresh morning's dew,
Adding to clouds more clouds with his deep sighs.
But all so soon as the all-cheering sun
Should in the farthest east begin to draw
The shady curtains from Aurora's bed,
Away from light steals home my heavy son,
And private in his chamber pens himself,
Shuts up his windows, locks fair daylight out,
And makes himself an artificial night.
Black and portentous must this humor prove
Unless good counsel may the cause remove.

Benvolio My noble uncle, do you know the cause?

Montague I neither know it nor can learn of him.

Benvolio Have you questioned him by any means?

Montague Both by myself and many other friends.
But he, his own affections' counselor,
Is to himself—I will not say how true,
But to himself so secret and so close,
So far from sounding and discovery,
As is the bud bit with an envious worm,
Ere he can spread his sweet leaves to the air,
Or dedicate his beauty to the same.
Could we but learn from whence his sorrows grow.
We would as willingly give cure as known.

Romeo enters stage

Benvolio See where he comes. So please you, step aside.
I'll know his grievance or be much denied.

Montague I would thou wert so happy by thy stay
To hear true shrift.—Come, madam, let's away.

Montague and Lady Montague exit stage

Benvolio Good morrow, cousin.

Romeo Is the day so young?

Benvolio But just struck nine.

Romeo Ay me! Sad hours seem long.
Was that my father that went forth so fast?

Benvolio It was. What sadness lengthens Romeo's hours?

Romeo Not having that which, having, makes them short.

Benvolio In love?

Romeo Out.

Benvolio Of love?

Romeo Out of her favor, where I am in love.

Benvolio Alas, that love, so gentle in its view,
Should be so tyrannous and hard in truth!

Romeo Alas, that love, whose view is hidden still,
Should, without eyes, see pathways to his will!
Where shall we dine? (sees blood) —O me! what fray was here?
Yet tell me not, for I have heard it all.
Here's much to do with hate but more with love.
Why then, O brawling love, O loving hate,
O anything of nothing first created!
O heavy lightness, serious vanity,
Misshapen chaos of well-seeming forms!
Feather of lead, bright smoke, cold fire, sick health,
Still-waking sleep, that is not what it is!
This love feel I, that feel no love in this.
Dost thou not laugh?
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