How much does it take to be enough to fit in? |
Enough? I heard you say, and I repeat “she is not all that” The quotations trying to cage the gravity This is me trying to lessen the impact This- is – me trying – tell my heart- it’s ok It was not When your boys laughed, seats tagged as their heads flipped backward All indications that I was the joke Standing there ‘I can’t cry,’ I sang the mantra ‘I will not cry, I repeated So much so that my words could hatch a ground But my heart was crumbling The webs trapping my feet How was I not enough I wore what they all wear Shaded the lips The deep red, your favorite color You said, Well, at least not directly to me She wore it yesterday, I could see the longing Here I am, look at me. I begged from within Your eyes raised towards me Not how I wanted but you did Just not a word The first tear rolled out An open gate for more to roll Head buried in my pillow I blamed every insufficiency on me Blamed my skin color Blamed my size Oh, I even blamed my parents Just a bold statement to justify not being wanted Wasn’t the last tear More came; I guess I just chose I chose the worth of my tears |