Marching Ides

"You are not intending to descend to that location, are you?"

"Negative. I have charged the ship for two moon rotations and stocked up on allotments of sustenance merely for celebration of enjoyment."

"I see you have applied sarcasm to your speech, Qex. I am laughing where my innards are stored, at your well placed humor."

"The banter is obvious, yes. And if you were uncertain as to my irritation at your question, let me roll my third eye in your general direction."

"That is a very impressive eye roll, Qex. However, I must insist that you refrain from launching your ship to that planet."

"Whyfore, Yussus? Must you vex me with such demands? Take note of the alluring blue with your fourth eye! Feast your fifth eye on the stunning green! By the calculations that run through my gray matter I am certain bovine secretions, the most divine of all nectar, dwells on that planet!"

"Undoubtable, Qex. And my taste receptors salivate as I reflect on the bovine secretions. Yet, you must beware, for that planet has a mighty curse taking place during this season of its rotation."

"How do you know such things, Yussus? I scoff at you!"

"I am in the possession of much knowledge in my brain sack, Qex. With my first eye I have read many accounts from across the galaxies. I boast of my great intelligence."

"Although I long to scorn at your immense brain sack, I reluctantly concede. How did awareness of this great curse come to your gray matter?"

"I will lower my speech volume, for the knowledge is great and must remain mysterious. Strain your hearing apparatus and attend to the sound waves that I express. Do you store in your memory banks the designation Julius Caesar?"

"Indeed. And I will recite my knowledge to you now. Long ago, Julius retreated from our magnificent orb, fixing his seventh eye on ruling over a realm of grotesque creatures who, sorrowfully, sported only two feeble eyes. Cloaking himself in tricks, he appeared among them as their kind and became their master. That is the limit of my consciousness in this matter."

"This globe you seek to navigate to and harvest secretions is the same that Julius found sanctuary."

"I cannot contain my surprising reaction. My ninth eye widens in astonishment! Does Julius yet reign? Whyfore have our two spheres not celebrated an alliance? "

"It brings me much agony in my innards to inform you that Julius' physical form has ceased to function. The curse of this time cycle brought his untimely extermination."

"Not for secrecy I now lower my speech volume, Yussus, but in dread and horror. My second eye quavers at the prospect of such a terrific bane!"

"Living in quarters adjacent to one another, I felt it my duty to inform you of this misfortune, of this Marching Ides!"

"I will heed your alarm, Yussus. I find much fortune in our acquaintanceship."

"My eighth eye is satisfied to be of service."



Whyfore did this come to pass? ▼

Written for "The Dialogue 500" 
March Winner!