Unbrainwashing Myself

Un-Brainwashed
Chapter 1: Mind Blocks

The first step in writing a novel was to unlearn everything that I had previously learnt. 40 years of Brainwashing had left me with very little access to my own brain.

It was crammed full of dates and times that were thoroughly meaningless. Starting at Chapter 1, I had to put the date back of the entire universe from 4004BC to millions and millions of years. This part landed me in hospital June 2019. I just couldn’t cope with the safety blanket being pulled out from under my feet.

I started using Brain Training software on the Nintendo DS (yes in 2020!) to open up my brain wider and wider.

I had managed to break through the fear of using Puppets, crayons, Printing, Scanning and of course typing on a very short time.

Bruce Logan had pointed out the evils of using cartoons or Puppets to share the Gospel. They would detract the listeners from the message itself. Which was of course far more important. We covered the evils of C.S Lewis using anthropomorphic characters in Narnia.

I really never understood how much damage this caused until I bought my own Puppets and couldn’t use them, without massive anxiety.

Writing, printing and scanning were major anxiety blocks, as my Cult writing was as offensive as you could possibly imagine, full of hate and conspiracy theories. Pointless Rage.

Using Word, Excel, PowerPoint, was also tied to that anger. I physically couldn’t use the software, so I found alternatives. The amazing breakthrough, is that I’m writing this in Microsoft Word after 26 years!
What I’ve done, usually can take years for Cult members, adapting to the real World, outside the wall. So the answer is that I’ve escaped from behind the Green Door.

Obviously the next step was to read the words of demons. The greatest Satanists on Earth. Charles Darwin, Frederick Neitzche, Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Immanuel Kant, David Hume, Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel, René Descartes and Voltaire, were demonic and evil. That their only goal in life was to Blaspheme God and take people to Hell.

The Great teachers of all time knew. Barry Smith, Chuck Missler, Bill Gothard even Jeremy Lee himself exposed these evil people and their evil deeds.
What if I was to read Occult books such as Richard Dawkins’ The Blind Watchmaker? Bill Maher was the Antichrist, questioning Christianity itself. The horror.
The next struggle was reading material that totally ignored the story of Adam and Eve. Could they be descendants of early hominoids? Could different hominoids evolve separately? Australopithecus, Ardipithecus ramidus, Homo Erects, Australopithecus Africanus.

Are these not all fake? Had not Scientists dug up baboon skulls and because of their religious belief, tried to fit it into Darwinism?
Adam and Eve would have to be the ancestor of only one Hominoid. So how did Australopithecus come from them as well. Who’s rib was taken. What dust was used to create Adam? My beliefs where being challenged.

As Ken himself the great deity of the Creation Cult says, There was no death before Adam. So no millions of years, then. That was that. No room in Genesis for the faith of Evolution.
Another barrier. Dark skinned people existed because the was the Mark of Cain. You’re saying that they are a separate species? I cannot fit them into the Genesis narrative. My brain has no box for this.

The next step was to scan all my University notes. Now that I was mentally able to use a scanner. Some pages had faded so I had to preserve my notes from 1993, for this project now in 2020. Now everything is accessible with the click of a button.

More importantly, I was able to read them with zero anxiety. I found my penguin book of Kings and Queens. Any date before 4004BC was crossed out. No empire could exist before the Earth was created in 6 days.

The debate, as to the meaning of the Hebrew word YOM was now irrelevant, as I threw the whole of the Old Testament out the proverbial window. I still clung onto Christ, but there was no need of his blood as a sacrifice anymore.

I studied Roman and Greek History at University, to give me more power. I wasn’t an average Christian. I was special. I knew things that the others didn’t.
Without this race to get the world saved before the Antichrist came, the learning again was pointless. Now I can use bits of my notes to put a background to my Dragon Novel. Dar5on. I typed back in 2004. My fingers slipped, maybe keep that name?

Books stretching back time even further. Pre-historic Egypt. Date of 4400BC? Before the Earth existed? Brain overload. Then it went back even further. I came across Tel Ubaid. Harry Hall had discovered a City under a City. Others before him had found what they believed to be the Biblical Mesopotamian.
Another mystery. Genesis talks of the Tigris and the Euphrates. But where are the Gihon and the Pishon, that watered the Garden of Eden?

The Sumerians diverted the 2 Rivers to use as irrigation. No mention of an Abraham.
Satan in the Garden, now had an equal. Enki the god of wisdom, Magic and Trickery. Reminds me of Loki.
The supreme god was Anu, God of the sky. There’s a lot if digging to be done here, as I know Tolkien used this very subject to create middle Earth and I would like to savor and document this journey too.
As Aslan breathed Creation into being, Ea sung the Universe into being. Back in my brainwashed days, I imagined YHWH, instead of saying “Let Light Be”, he had sung it.

Marduk the king of the Babylonian gods. I have to sidestep here. When I was insane I watched a “Documentary” by Jeremiah Films about the “Revival of Evil”. I believed I was the Antichrist and I bought a skull, candles and a knife. I dedicated my life to Satan.
I started to buy every Black Metal band I could find. Satyricon, Marduk, Cradle of Filth, Burzum, Emporer, Venom etc. I was a secret Satanist. Vaakvandering, a Christian Black Metal band, helped me to know I’m not straying too far from “Acceptable” Christianity. Stryper with their hit song “To Hell with the Devil” was not acceptable. At one deliverance session I was forced to attend. They ripped off my Stryper tee-shirt and cast it out in the name of Jesus. Leaving me half naked.
So then. Satan and Hell do not exist. So another pointless thing I did. There was no hell? So millions and millions of people, weren’t being cast into a lake of fire. My whole childhood was a lie. Mary K Baxter, never went there. My brain was straining at the edges. Too much to unlearn. Take a break.

The 12 God’s of the Egyptians, Babylonian etc. were linked to the 12 Signs if the Zodiac. Another forbidden subject for me to study. Anyone practicing divination was to be put to death. So why did Joseph have a cup of divination? Please don’t think too hard. The whole mythology will come crumbling down. We are talking about a religion in which millions and millions of people believe it to be true. Do not shake the foundations.

In 1872, George Smith, working at the British Museum, uncovered the Epic of Gilgamesh. A mythology with the creation of man (No women yet) and a story of Enlil flooding the Earth with Ea saving the humans. Ea tells Utnapishtim to build an enormous boat to save mankind.

Again, another block to get through. The Grand Canyon was supposed to be proof that YHWH had flooded the Earth. Millions of dead things, laid down in water, buried in rock layers, all over the Earth.

If the flood story was a myth, what was the alternative? A YouTube Video on how each layer had formed over thousands or millions of years, blew my mind. Brain overload. Does not compute. Reboot.

Chapter 2:
The Real Flood Mythology

In 1625 Pietro Della Valle, found the ruins of Ur. Meso meaning between and Potamos meaning River. Between Rivers. The General consensus, was that we had evolved from hunter-gatherers to growing crops (Wheat, figs and Grapes) and the domestication of animals.

Genesis had humans working the ground, right from the start. Another twist of the brain, allowing new thoughts in. At least the passage was now open. The language of Sumerian had to equal among the others. The belief that Adam knew how to write, was completely ignored.

Myths are updated. Now Marduk slayed the great dragon Tiamat, to create Earth out of her remains. Ken Ham reading it backwards, saying that it’s a distortion of Genesis.

More digging, more searching. Eridu now recognized as the oldest City on Earth. Humans starting to make pottery, that will last until we can dig them out.

Writing. Symbols for wheat, cattle, goods being etched into clay. The forms of letters or syllables being shortened to get things down faster. 1500 symbols down to a mere 600!

Eventually Sumeria had their own written language which was to be replaced by Akkadian as the Empire changed hands. Sargon I defeated the Sumerians, adopted their language and transformed it to make it his own. Eventually this will be repeated once again, as the Greek Empire gets swollowed up by Rome.

Chapter 3