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by Ned Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E · Poetry · Comedy · #2231371
What happened when a spider spied her. Entry in the Humorous Poetry Contest
With permission, dear reader, I'll task you -
To answer this question I'll ask you.
How many have fears,
When a spider appears,
To intimidate and harass you?

Reader, put yourself in my shoes.
I hope you will not refuse,
To allow me to fight,
For a peaceful night,
And establish just whose bed is whose?

For just as I settled in bed,
A spider appeared o'er my head.
Not content with his angle,
He continued to dangle,
Causing me considerable dread.

I admit I started to curse him,
In vain I hoped to reverse him.
Yet he would not flee,
Kept staring at me,
Nothing I said would disperse him.

I yelled out "Hey, listen you!
Try putting yourself in my shoes.
You've no right to roam,
All over my home,
And dangle wherever you choose".

And then, to my great surprise,
He answered my outraged cries.
The spider did speak,
At first in a squeak,
And then a voice calm and wise.

"Why is it you so despise
A creature who freely supplies?
For just room and board,
I'll consume a great horde,
Of pesky mosquitoes and flies".

I begged him: "stay under the floors!
Or, agree to sleep out of doors".
If he'd go his way,
I could let him stay,
And I could produce some snores

Then I made a decision unwise.
Honestly, I could not devise,
How to rest on my pillow,
Knowing the fellow,
Was staring at me with eight eyes.

With my shoe, I began to chase him,
From my room, I meant to erase him.
I then laid down to rest,
Sans my unwanted guest,
Whose departure I'd managed to hasten.

In my solitude, I happily snoozed,
But in the morning, was rather confused,
At the fate I did meet,
When dressing my feet.
The spider had put himself in my shoes!

Dear reader, if a spider you spy,
Do not be so foolish as I.
He will win the fight,
With the sting of his bite,
For a spider is sneaky and sly.


60 Lines
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