I miss him

I miss him.
I miss his idiotic self and all the dumb things he used to do.
I miss purposely surrounding myself near him because I wanted him to look at me.
I miss how he would gaze at me wherever I went.
I miss the way he used to stare into my eyes, his long, thick eyelashes and dark eyes luring me in even more.
I miss his charming smile and his perfectly even, white teeth.
I miss the feeling of being alone with him, just us two and nobody else.
I miss his tight hugs, making me feel safe; as if he is my rock, my protector, my world...
I miss his soft lips, kissing me gently.

But things changed quickly.

The day after our first kiss, he no longer noticed me.
He didn't talk to me.
He didn't even look at me.
It was as if I was a ghost, and he didn't sence my presence.
Like I didn't exist...

I realised that I'd been used, but I couldn't bring myself to acknowledge it.

One day, things fell apart completely. We went our separate ways and haven't seen each other or spoken since.
I know that I must move forward and carry on with my life, for the world is still advancing and I need to progress with it.

Nevertheless, I can't live in this agony anymore.
I'm terrified of dreaming about him, waking up and feeling a piece of my heart break off.
I'm sick of everything reminding me of him.
I can't stop making up scenarios in my head, then realising that they'll never happen.

Truth is, I can't move on. No matter how hard I try.
Please, come back to me.

I miss you