Alone

I sigh as I sit on the step of my porch and I briefly think of the T-shirt slogan about being left unattended. I snort and roll my eyes. I think of several things I could be doing. Cleaning out my closet, cleaning my bathroom, scrubbing my shower for the hundredth time. I stop and wonder why I always think of things to clean when I am alone and happily doing nothing. Maybe I'm not happy about it. I shrug my shoulders and look out at the marina across the water dappled by the afternoon sunlight.

I lean back face to the sky with my eyes shut to feel the sun warm my face. My thoughts wander to another place, where I am not alone. He strokes my cheek and then pulls me closer, kissing my face, my lips, my neck. I smile and sigh again, sitting up to place my elbows on my knees with my face resting on my hands.

It seems to be getting darker. I look toward the west, it's darker that way, the sky seems to be clouding up. I get up slowly, stretching my arms out above my head. I stand looking at the water for another minute or two, mesmerized by the movement of the water.

I think about the storm that's coming. I think I am like the raindrops that will soon be falling. They have been alone, formed in the sky and falling a long, long way, but they won't be alone always. They will fall, leaving behind the clean surfaces they wash over, taking away the dust, the pollen, the dullness. I laugh to myself as I think of lonely raindrops being like me, rushing to clean the earth. Then they will rejoin the water of the bay, just as I will soon rejoin friends and family, and my love.