ADOLESCENCE

                   Adolescence
Adolescence, how do we define it? Well for starters teenage, puberty and adolescence are all interrelated. It's not at all easy to define these words which merely are just words. Everything and I mean everything is so simple until we turn into a teenager. It's like this, even if we are in trouble we don't get it or become a paranoid about it. Being toddlers we aren't depressed, tensed, pressurized and most importantingly .......... in love . Not knowing how cruel this world is we enter this stage so called 'adolescence'. It's like our lives keep turning upside down and our minds keep fluctuating. We are immensely confused about almost anything, we have mixed feeling, which to be said aren't easy to overcome. I don't know what I am getting at , I am just fourteen and personally I think a person going through adolescence is the one who can define it the best, but all I know right now is that all struggles we go through adolescence and the changes we have , help us to grow both mentally and physically. However, these struggles or changes are somewhat depressing. These are the two factors of anxiety during teen life. I usually find myself sitting and thinking about all i have been through in the past one year, how i have changed completely and lost my true self. All these things I did, isn't something i should have done. What's the point of regretting? This is how we change i guess, is it? I am not me anymore and its hurt for some reason. I want to go back to how i used to be .......... naive, caring , someone who had a heart or someone who didn't pretend to not have a heart or stone-hearted . At night I usually find myself crying , for unknown reasons , am I that broken from the inside ? And from the outside no one even knows what happening . it's like I have to do it, pretend that everything is okay and not falling apart. If I try to make someone close understand they don't understand...they just think that I am another of those teenagers who are trying to grab attention...am I really? .... Or are they really? All this time, I have been surrounding myself with fake people, i hate to admit that no one actually cares, about me, family obviously being an exception..Everyone is selfish, they just pretend to like me, because none of us want to be lonely and we for obvious reasons cannot be self sufficient. these fake people who apparently want to get to know me aren't even getting to know the real me, because I , myself, don't know the real me anymore, so how can they ? Painful? I don't think so, I guess some of us are just meant to be like this. And i would be exaggerating if I say I am the only one . There are thousands of teenagers all around the world who are suffering from one thing or another. Many of those because of having divorced parents, or because of being bullied. I am just another of those teenagers, suffering from love.....how does it feel? I don't know. Being everywhere around him makes me even closer to him. You might be thinking how I am everyone around him, or what's my relationship with him? Well it's really complicated ;)