The worm turns

The day began, at last I was in control, I thought. This day had been looming for a very long time. I was surrounded by people who had issues and problems which they wanted me to solve. Diplomacy had always been my strategy, keeping the peace, refusing to buy into arguments, it was inevitable that the day that things would come to head.

Family. The word evokes a picture of comfort, an alliance, people who one can always count on, because blood is thicker than water. “Correct?”
Don't you believe it, when all is said and done we are all alone, unable to depend upon anyone. Words uttered in sympathy, such as, “Just call me and I’ll be by your side no matter what,” are meaningless.
Everyone in this world is looking out for themselves, and if you say that's not true you are fooling yourself.
I sound as if I'm losing the plot I know, but the time has arrived to think of myself for once. I've only just now realised at this late juncture I can't rely on anyone.
We come into the world alone and we leave alone. Oh yes, we make attachments along the way, partners, who travel the same road, people we enjoy spending time with, but in reality we can only depend on ourself, the only one we can really trust.
“ Why am I so bitter?” You may well ask, you're probably surprised because it's me. Me, Simon! The one who is usually so accommodating, so understanding. The peacemaker, the one to whom everybody turns to in their times of trouble.
Well, I hate to be the one to disappoint, but I’m at the short end of a very long fuse.
The fuse has been burning, oh so slowly and for so long. No one has noticed or cared.
Shakespeare once famously wrote that even the worm will turn. Well this worm has has been trodden on once too often and is about to get revenge, so they'd all better watch out.
So what's this all about? Come closer and I'll tell you my sad story.
My wife left me over fifteen years ago. Beth was her name, we were in love, or so I was lead to believe, we married young after a whirlwind romance, she thought I was something special. I had prospects, I would be able to give her money and the status she desired. I was a disappointment and Beth showed her scorn often.
We were together long enough to have our three children, Mikey, Cassie and the baby, Tessa.
I worked long hours to make all their lives as comfortable as possible, even though I wasn't happy at Cash and Son. I waited in vain for the promotion as a partner at the law firm, but was overlooked time again. Beth made feel less than a man each time I failed.
I found the letter saying she’d left, not only me, but the children too.
The years passed by too quickly. I grew older, my hair became thinner and my shoulders stooped from sitting for so many hours, days and weeks at my desk, as I strived, unsuccessfully I may add, to make my family happy.
.
The children eventually grew up and moved away, only contacting me when they needed something. When they did, I was always there for them, bailing them out of trouble, buying their first cars, paying for weddings, honeymoons and eventually house deposits.
Anyway the sting in the tail of this sad life was a terminal illness diagnosis.
“Do you have family to take care of you Simon?” The doctor asked me one day as my illness took hold. I was struggling to manage.
“Oh yes, Doc, three great kids, they'll be there for me”
But it turned out that they were all just too busy with their own lives to take care of their old Dad.
“Call the Silver Chain, they'll look after him. Why don’t you visit Dad more often?” Tessa asked her brother.
“It's your turn to do something, I'm too busy at work, I've a promotion on the cards.” Mike dismissed his sister’s request.
“Don't ask me to look after him, I've got the kids.” Cassie said.
“What do you think the house is worth?” I heard one of them whisper one day when they thought I was asleep. “I’m drowning in debt, the money will sure come in handy.”
I had time aplenty to reflect on my life, as I battled my illness, wishing I'd done things differently and desperately wanted another chance but it was too late. Maybe not I thought.

I replay in my mind their voices, as I lie in my hospital bed. I recall the sounds of my children bickering about their old father's care, and the worth of the family home, and I smile.
I think about the visitor I'd had this very morning. Old Mr Cash’s grandson is a solicitor now, following in his father's footsteps, it was good to see him.
Oh, what a surprise they'll all get when they read the new will and realise the proceeds from the estate are to be spent, not on them, but on freezing my old body, ready for my new life someday.



Word count 877