That's fine

“If you continue to touch the door, I will bite your hand off.” I stared impatiently at the ball of fluff standing across the room from me. She insisted on opening and closing the front door as if it were some form of entertainment. Of course, that was letting cold air in. And of course, I don’t have any real form of heating in this house. It’s not my house so even if I wanted heating… that’s not important.

She is beyond annoying. I would be lying if I said I wouldn’t abandon her given the chance.

She glanced back to me for a second, “don’tcha mean the door will bite my hand off?” her voice was thick with about as much superiority someone below five foot could have (this is surprisingly high apparently). She continued to slam the door shut. It was like a toddler throwing a tantrum except the toddler is an adult and fully aware that they’re being a dumbass, and probably want to freeze to death.

I wouldn’t mind if she froze, I can throw her out myself.

I sighed, “No, asshole, I mean I will personally bite your damn hand off.”

She stopped for a moment then turned to face me, her mouth twisted upwards. Her smiles always look forced, “You can’t fit my hand in your mou-”

“Do you want to test that?” I stood up and made my way over to her, quickly grabbing her hand and moving it away from the door. She looked startled for a moment, then pulled her hand away.

That’s fine.

“Okay,” she stood up and walked around me to the staircase, “I’ll go do other things. You’re not fun anyways.”

I watched as she walked up the stairs, waiting for her to trip. That would be funny. You know? She moves around surprisingly well for someone who claims to be blind - which she isn’t blind. Maybe in one eye, yeah, but she can see fine with the other. She parades around claiming to be blind to get sympathy - which I guess is cool, I can get free stuff out of that - but it’s irritating. She expects to be treated like some poor little kitten who can’t do anything for itself. Surprisingly enough, I don’t like cats.