I'm Not The Only One

“I am not crazy. There is video evidence of you cheating!” I sneered at my husband, Chris. He opened his mouth to argue but clamped it shut again. “You will not make a fool of me. We are married for better or for worse, you made a commitment.”

“I thought I was going to jail! The only way to get you not to testify against me was for us to get married. I’m not gay!”

“It’s not too late for me to testify against you. I can go to the police and tell them everything that I know. You may not be gay now but after a few weeks in prison,” the horror was etched across his face. It gave me a weird surge of power to watch as my husband realized that this marriage was for keeps. “The question is what do you want?”

Chris stood up, took me in his arms, and kissed me. It was the first time in the marriage that he had voluntarily touched me. It felt nice, but not as nice as what I had planned next. A smile crept up on my face as he laid me in our bed, and climbed on top of me.

When Chris woke up, he was alone. I had things to take care of. He had just sat up in bed, I heard him moving around, so I brought in his breakfast. “Morning Sunshine.”

“Morning.” He grumbled before grabbing the coffee and taking a long sip. “Do you know what happened to my phone?”

“Yes. I took it and called your little tramp over.” His eyes went wide. I set the tray down, and grabbed his hand, I pulled him out of bed and into the living room. He found his playmate bound and gagged. “I figured she would want to see first hand that we have decided to make our marriage work.”

Before he could object, I wrapped myself around him. My tongue darted into and out of his mouth. His hands traveled south, cupping my butt. She squirmed and made some noise. “Sorry, Lacy but I can’t divorce him. I know I said I would but I just can’t.”

With a smile, I handed him the gun that was on the counter. Briefly, I had thought about putting it on his breakfast tray, but that seemed to be bad form. You wait until after coffee to ask your husband to commit murder for you. “Since I kidnapped her, I think you should shoot her.”

He hesitated to take the gun from me, so I thrust it at him again. Reluctantly he took it. “I don’t think we have to kill her. She got the point that I’m your husband and I’m not leaving you.”

“I didn’t ask for her life story. Shoot her in the head, so we can bury her and have breakfast.” Sometimes he really exasperated me. His hands trembled, his eyes pleaded with me. “You didn’t have this much trouble killing Rocky. What is the issue?”

“Rocky was…” Chris sighed and aimed the gun at me. “I could end this whole mess right now. Take you out and go back to living a straight life.”

I laughed. He looked at me confused as the girl squirmed again. “Do you really think that you can kill me and get away with it? I have evidence hidden all around, just waiting to be sent to the police if I die.”

“I told you he was evil. I can’t deal with this anymore.” Chris turned the gun on himself. Straight boys are so dramatic when they’re asked to stay married to a gay man by force of blackmail. “If I offer myself then you’d be left alone, with no one.”

“Because you killed Rocky. He and I were going to be married before you took him away from me. The only thing that he did wrong was tell someone that he thought you were cute.” Chris stared at me as if I had sprouted three heads. He turned to Lacy and watched as her eyes grew larger. “I didn’t marry you to keep you out of jail and help you avoid punishment. Being married to me is the punishment. You’ll never have sex with another woman, not as long as I live.”

“I’ll kill myself. For years I’ve lived with the guilt of killing Rocky, and I’m done with it. Last night, I thought we turned a corner. I thought maybe having sex with my husband isn’t such a bad thing. He loves me, and I can learn to love him.”

“Aww, you can learn to love me?” The words were like candy to my ears. Maybe finally the marriage that had started out for the wrong reasons could turn into a beautiful love story. One that we could tell our grandkids one day. But I had to do something to show him that anger and revenge could give way to sweetness and love. I grabbed the gun from him. “Let’s make this work, baby.”

Lacy watched as I trained the gun on her and pulled the trigger, once. Twice. Three times. She had the audacity to bleed onto my couch. “We’ll have to go furniture shopping and get a new couch. Some people are just rude.”

“You killed her.”

“Now there are two murders in this relationship. It’s a good thing. If one sells the other down the river, we both go down. We’re truly equals now.”

“When I killed Rocky, I was…”

“Jealous. I know. Everyone knew. But now we’re together, forever. Tied together with our shared secrets. Isn’t it marvelous?”

“I’m not the only one…”

“You’re still the only one who cheated. Would you like me to do that.”

“No. No.” He shook his head. He couldn’t handle the jealousy of me being with another man. How adorable is that? “I’m not the only one…”

I wiped the gun free of fingerprints; he would be the one to dispose of it. Insurance.