The Beast Within

I stood on the other side of glass counter, while he tapped his foot impatiently. I stared at the ring, it's glittering solitaire diamond with the delicate scrolling on the sides, winked under the fluorescent lighting. I stared at it, remembering when he had proposed marriage. It was at a high end steak house and the ring was at the bottom of my champagne glass. He got down on one knee, teary eyed, I nodded yes. Applause erupted through the restaurant as people nodded and cheered their approval.

"Look lady, I ain't got all day. Tell ya what, you figure it out and let me know," the pawnbroker drawled as he sidled away, his predatory vision locked onto a gentleman who was checking out the guitar selection.

I couldn't help it, the memories began to wash over me, like waves crashing on the shore. It was only two years ago, that we became engaged, but in reality, it seemed lifetimes ago, and two different people. Two people who wanted love and a solid foundation to build on, two people who never ever saw the bizarre ending that would come.

It was odd you know, the way we met. A friend of mine stopped by my house after the kids were in bed, he said he just wanted to hang out and catch up, and brought another friend with him. I realized pretty soon in, that this wasn't just a casual visit, but that there was definitely an agenda. They were both a little tipsy, and since it was late in the evening, I was in my flannel robe and bunny slippers. We all chatted for a while, then Paul stood up and said he was heading back home, Johnny said that he wanted to stay and chat some more. I said fine.

I got up to get us something to drink and Johnny followed me into the kitchen. 'You are beautiful, I've been begging Paul to bring me over to introduce us. I've seen you many times in the neighborhood, you are incredibly beautiful,' he murmured in my ear, coming up behind me.

I think I laughed, a little nervously. He turned me around to face him, staring into his eyes, there was something familiar about them, but I shook off the nagging little feeling as he leaned in to kiss me. Warm tendrils of happiness spiraled up from my toes to the top of my head. How pleasant! He pulled back and stared at me, smiling. Then started to lean in to kiss me again, when I stopped him.

"Let's talk more first," I said. "I want to know more about you."

Reluctantly he pulled back, and we sat down at the kitchen table. "What do you want to know sweetheart?", he asked quietly smiling.

"Where did you grow up? Where is your family from?", I ventured.

He chuckled, "My family moved down here when I was in the seventh grade, from Pennsylvania. My dad bought a house in a subdivision in Maven Island. And we've been here ever since."

Being a life-long 'Islander' I asked, "Which subdivision?"

"Oh Surfside on the North side by the river," he replied.

My mind began to hum and buzz, that was my subdivision! Johnny Welsh, Johnny Welsh....Oh my God! I stood up, shaking.

"Get out! Get out of my house! Right now! Leave!," I sputtered as the realization of who he was dawned on me.

His face registered hurt and confusion. "I don't understand honey! What's wrong! Tell me so we can work it out! I've waited a long time to meet you!" He stood up, his hands held up and pleading.

I would not allow this not one more step to progress. "You! You made my life a living nightmare! You tortured me as a child! You followed me everywhere and bullied me! You even got me sent to the Christian school after you spray painted 'Annie is a whore' on my dad's driveway! Get out now!!!"

"I honestly don't remember honey, please let me.."

"No, no, no. I don't want to hear it, leave now or I call the cops," I replied.

Reluctantly he left, and I heaved a sigh of relief. Johnny Welsh tortured me as a child. I wasn't safe from his taunts and bullying until finally his family left our neighborhood. It was agony. I shook my head after making sure my doors and windows were locked. Then the absurdity of the situation struck me. 'Good', I thought. I'm glad you want me, and I can spurn you now. Karma. I shook it off, and went to bed, tired and slightly bemused. I had an early day at work the next day and needed some rest.

After a long tedious day at work, I was making my way home. Thoughts of what to make for dinner, how the kids were doing, all of the house chores that still needed to be finished paraded through my mind. I wasn't really paying attention to the plywood signs that dotted the road leading down to my house, until I turned down the main drive. Spray painted neon green plywood signs, were placed every few feet from one another. My name on them, with apologies and compliments painted in scrunched lettering. What the...? 'I'm sorry for what I did'! 'I was a fool'! 'I was a stupid kid forgive me'! 'Please call me'! This was crazy, and oddly satisfying. I pulled into the convenience store that was situated at the corner in front of my neighborhood. More signs propped up in front of the store.

I walked in, the cashiers and customers looked at me, smiling, and started clapping. I felt my face burning in embarrassment.

"Aww c'mon Annie, give him a chance! I've never seen Johnny so smitten ever!"

"Well, Lloyd, I don't know. We'll see," I replied to the old man who bought at least a hundred dollars worth of lottery tickets every day.

I moved to the counter to pay for my merchandise. Shelby, the manager and owner of the store was chuckling.
"Honey, I never seen a man so desperate! You better give him a chance before he loses his mind!"

I extricated myself, and drove further down my road to the entrance of my neighborhood, and there he was. Standing at the front, dressed as a clown, holding flowers and playing 'It Had to Be You' on a boom box. I pulled over, and he walked over to the car.

"Did you see the signs," he breathed heavily.

I nodded, smiling, he was a complete loon, with the clown makeup sweating off his skin.

"Will you give me a chance? Let me make it up to you?," his hand resting on mine.

I was oddly touched. How karmic that after all these years, the bully of my childhood would be looking into my face, his eyes pleading for a chance to at least get to know him, a chance for him to make me happy. I nodded, "Come on, get in the car, Johnny. I have to get the kids and make dinner, you can join us."

His clown face broke into a grin, and he got in the car.

Our first year together was intense, challenging, and filled with good times and love. We built a business together, and brought our children together under my roof, where before he had limited contact with them. We were building our family, our business and our life, it looked and felt amazing.

It was subtle at first, but definitely noticeable. He was drinking more, and with new hires that I didn't know, who were now with our construction company. I objected at first about the new guys, obviously from his party days, but he was right. We had more business than we could handle with just our core team, and we needed to expand. Paydays were a bit raucous, but handled by me while the men waited their turn (and a few gals too ). Some of these guys, though, were just seedy, I didn't like them around our girls, which proved all too true when one drunkenly made a pass at my then 14 year old daughter. I canned him, Johnny rehired him, saying I didn't understand how long they were friends and that he did stupid things when he had been drinking. We had a huge argument over that. As a matter of fact, the arguments were becoming more and more frequent. It was with dread deep in my heart, we approached our second year of being together and it was the holidays. I knew that I would have to break it all off with him, and that would devastate our business, our lives, our kids. But I knew that I couldn't tolerate the arguments, the drinking, the shady 'friends'.


Christmas was good for the kids and we tried to fake our way through it. Surely he felt the same. One last holiday bonanza for New Year's and then I would tell him it was over. We had planned our New Year's Eve party for close friends and family, having spent quite a bit of money on food, favors, drinks. About an hour before the party was scheduled to start, Johnny announced he had to go to the store for more ice. It had been hours since he was gone. Finally his sister came over with her kids and said she saw his truck down the road where a huge party was taking place.

I decided to go down to the party to retrieve Johnny, or at least see what the problem was. Two of my friends insisted on going with me. One was on crutches with a broken ankle, the other had recently undergone back surgery. I myself six months prior had been in a head on car collision, and had total arm and hand reconstruction, with feeling only lately having had returned to my fingers.

We loaded up and headed on down the road, the three of us. The party was in full swing, you could see the 20 ft high bonfire raging in the front of the property. We parked and all got out to look for Johnny. There were about fifty party goers in all stages of inebriation, laughing, stumbling, shouting. I spotted Johnny on the far side of the property and steeled myself up for a confrontation.

I approached him, touching him lightly on the arm, "Come on honey, it's time to go home."

He pulled back with a sneer on his face, drunken and angry. "You! You think you know it all! You don't know shit! You think you're so damn perfect! And look at you! You are nothing! No one!"

"John, it's time to come home. Everyone is waiting for you at the house. Come on, let's go," I said tugging on his sleeve.

He reared back, indignantly. His hand raised to a fist as he made to strike me. I remember everything in slow motion. My arm which had been in so much pain for so many weeks, suddenly came to life. How dare he try to strike me! My arm shot out and my fingers scratched his face open. He roared in pain and rage.

Suddenly I felt my arms grabbed and the back of my head. Many hands began tugging on me dragging me to the ground. Beer bottles were broken on my head as other hands began to claw at my clothes, and other hands went under my dress attempting to drag my underwear from my body. I was completely pinned to the ground by at least seven men.

Johnny was laughing evilly, "That's the way she likes it boys! Give it to her!"

My face and body were pushed into the dirt, the hands now eagerly tearing at my clothing and holding my wrists and legs tightly. My thoughts were so scrambled in terror, I thought I would go completely insane. Instead, something brittle and furious broke out throughout my being.

Before I knew it I was hovering well above the nightmare scene. Everyone there was in the midst of an all out riot. My friend who had recent back surgery was on her back her arms flung over her face. My other friend on her crutches whirled around, and began to wield them like a sword. I looked down at my own body as it was writhing on the ground under a seething pile of infuriated bodies.

Within that same breadth of seeing myself, I was back inside of my own body. Now, however, I felt strength and momentum building until I started to spin. I cannot say how fast I was spinning, however I knew it was at a great rate of speed. With the spinning of my body, I felt my back teeth elongate and pierce the back of my tongue. I felt my nails grow and sharpen. I was aware of this within the second it happened. Bodies flew off of me to the right and to the left. A few were bleeding profusely with gaping slash wounds across their faces, chests, hands and legs. One man stood hunched over towards my right. He was holding a wound over his forearm, the blood still seeping through.

"C'mon, we have to go!", he came over towards me his face fully alert and in concern. I nodded my head and he turned me towards my truck as we wove our way through the frenzied mob.

"I have to get Kris and Lisa!," I yelled at him.

"They are already in the truck..", his sentence cut short by a strong blow to his temple.

It was Johnny! He started towards me, the bonfire blazing like a hellish inferno behind him. His eyes were
bulging with rage, his fists were clenched.

"You Bitch! Always everything is about you! Time for Daddy to teach you a lesson..", he snarled.

He grabbed my hair, and threw me onto the ground. Before I could scramble away another person came up behind him and grabbed legs. It was Johnny's friend, the one who had made a pass at my teenage daughter! They both started dragging me towards the fire. I was scrambling to find purchase in the dirt to slow them down, but both of them enraged, were too strong for my digging into the ground

"You're such a bitch! A damn witch bitch! You know what happens to witches!", Johnny shrieked at me.

Suddenly I on my two legs, had broken free from their grasp! I was in a rage! Before my mind could comprehend I had leapt through the air, like a cat. My teeth finding and sinking into the fleshy part of the molester's thigh. My head shook as I shredded skin and muscle. The blood hot and gurgling like a geyser in the back of my throat. Mike tentatively called me, saying we had to go now! The man was on the ground groaning in pain, clutching his inner thigh that now poured blood profusely. Johnny was on his knees crying and pleading for mercy. I turned and ran back towards the truck, seeing my friends, and Mike (the man who was struck while trying to help me) already inside. I flew into the driver's seat and peeled out in the driveway to head home.

We were all breathing hard, not quite sure exactly had just transpired. I looked in the rear view mirror at Kris and Lisa. "You guys ok?," I ventured.

"My fucking God what just happened?", Kris answered.

"I don't know," I responded softly.

"Mike? I'll clean up that nasty cut on your arm. I probably should take you to the hospital."

He shook his head, "No, please. Just drop me off at my place. I'll be ok," he swallowed loudly. "I have never seen anything like that...ever."

I looked over at him, and the look of mistrust and fear couldn't be hidden in his gaze.

"What just happened Mike? What the hell just happened?", I said in a slightly hysterical tone.

He looked out the window and swallowed, "I was driving by when I saw your truck parked out by the end of driveway. All hell was breaking loose! Everyone screaming and beating each other. I parked and looked around, that was when I saw you on the ground, under those assholes. I ran over to try and pull them off so I could reach you. I punched through and all of a sudden my arm was slashed," his eyes slowly turned to me.

"Then the screaming began, as everyone was trying to get away. You stood up, and when you did, you weren't..", he tapered off.

"I what? What is it?", I gasped at him.

He shook his head, his eyes were tearing, and his left hand came to cover his mouth. "I will never forget, ever. You weren't you, you were something else. Something more hideous than any horror flick I've ever seen.." His head snapped up.

"Let me out of the truck, let me out now," he stuttered as he tried to open the door.

I pulled over, Kris and Lisa weren't saying anything just each looking out of their respective windows.

"Mike, I.."

"No. Don't. I'm glad you're ok and all, but honest to God, I never want to see you again. For the love of God just pretend you never knew me."

He left, slamming, the door behind him. My breath whooshed out of me, as I absorbed what he had just said. We pulled up in my driveway, all of us, tired, confused, and a little sore.

We went inside and got the kids to bed. Soon a sheriff's deputy showed up at my door, he was at first quite aggressive, but left scratching his head in confusion when he realized that we were unhurt, clean, and somewhat together. The confused officer had said he had been called to the party address where Johnny and a few others had made claims that I and several large unidentifiable men had crashed the party and trespassed the property. The large men proceeded to beat everyone they saw in sight, and left when I did. My dress was spotless, my fingernails short trimmed and clean, and he could see that everyone was celebrating a quiet New Year's Eve.

"Ma'am you should have seen them," he said turning to me. "Must have been about twenty five or so fellas just ripped to shreds, looked like they got beat up by a football team and their panther mascot," he stared at me for an uncomfortable moment.

I swallowed, "I'm sure Deputy. You know how those boys get when they get sauced up."

He shook his head and got into his patrol car and left. I looked at my friends who said they wanted to stay at the house with me and the children. We all had been through hell. As I walked into my bathroom I studied my image in the mirror. Something deep inside my darkest depths growled. I smiled and knew in that moment that everything would always be ok. That anyone or anything that every tried to hurt me or my family and friends would be stopped. I felt an inner powerful glow, that although not unfamiliar to me, now meant something quite new.

"Jake!," I wrapped on the glass case. "I want it in cash, smaller bills."

"Sure doll, whatever you want"....