Proposal

Proposal

“Hello. Mr. Patterson?”

“Yes. What are you selling? Caught me in a buying mood. Just won the lottery.”

“Sir, really? Could you turn the music down. Can barely hear you over the phone. I'm Courtland Klein. A ….friend of your daughter, Jessie.”

“My god! Something happen?”

“No sir. She's fine. And...congratulations by the way.”

“Na. Didn't win.” He said in a whisper. “Since retirement, I love yanking the chain of telephone sales people, trying to rob me of my meager pension. Just yesterday, bought a time share. Heard champagne corks popping going off in the background. When asked for my credit card, I said...what's a credit card. Laughed myself to sleep on that one.”

“Sounds...fun, Mr Patterson. I'll make a note of it and try it.”

“What can I do for you?”

“I know we've never met, but I thought it only right to...Well, to be perfectly honest with you...”

“Whoa there. I have a rule about that. Anyone who talks to me for a spell, then proceeds to inform me that NOW, they are going to honest with me, means everything you've said up to now, is'nt honest.”

“Sir?”

“It's like but. Everything said before but, doesn't count.”

“Sir...I wish to ask your permission to marry your daughter.”

Silence.....

“Have you slept with her?”

“To be honest, no.”

“Son, I suggest you cut the word honest from your vocabulary. And honestly, no, you can't marry Josie. If I'd slept with my wife before we married, we wouldn't be having this conversation. You understand?”

“Think so. You suggesting I sleep with her before I marry her?”

“Hell no! You slimy weasel. That's my daughter!”