Penguin Pacin'

         Bob pressed his face against the smooth, cold window and stared unblinkingly. He hoped to find answers here, and his concentration was such that he failed to hear foot steps approach him. He yelped, and jumped when a hand slapped him on the shoulder. He recognized the booming voice immediately. "Hey, is that you, Bob? What're you doin' here at the zoo? Planning to move in?"

         Gulping in some calming breaths, Bob turned to see his brother-in-law, Hank. "Geez, you almost gave me a heart attack. I'm studying the penguins if you must know."

         Hank gestured with a shrug, "What? Are you a bird man now? You're kiddin' right?"

         Peering back through the glass enclosure, Bob pointed, and attempted to explain.

         "I heard a new theory in the emergency room the other day. Believe it or not, experts are claiming that we should all walk like penguins to prevent slips and falls. I dunno about you, but I'm tired of fallin' on my butt out there in the snow and ice. Hey, I thought the idea had merit."

         Hank shook his head. "You really believe those toddlin' things will teach you somethin'? Wait, what're you doin' now?"

          Bob placed his feet shoulder width apart, leaned forward, folded his arms tight to his body, and waddled slowly around a laughing Hank.

         "See, Hank? This is supposed to spread out my weight, and enhance my balance. Wanna try it? I call it penguin power pacin'."

          Hank snorted. "I think you're forgettin' one thing."

         "What's that?", asked Bob as he bounced off the wall.

         "Penguins never carry anything, do they? Where are their bags, and brief cases? And, you know what else? Only another penguin would find that posture attractive."

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