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Rated: E · Short Story · Comedy · #2099722
A Flash Fiction piece describing Amy's first day on the job.
         Earlier this morning, Amy had been greeted by her new boss with a brief handshake, and a clipped "Watch your step." Now, she was struggling to stay on her feet as her co-workers piled paper after paper onto her outstretched arms. There hadn't been time to survey the office upon her arrival. The rumor was true, this business meant business. Good, she wanted to be indispensable, but hadn't she been hired to be a paper-pusher, not a paper-carrier? Whoa, now she couldn't see anything.
         Somebody grabbed her shoulders, and turned her around. With a pat to her backside, hey this was not acceptable, Amy heard, "Right, off with you then. Just follow the corridor, and watch your step."
         Huh, Amy thought. This must be a company motto. She did plan to succeed one step at a time. This was unexpected though. Whew, she mused, paper is heavy. Could this be some sort of office hazing? Set the newbie loose to wander, and see if she found her way back? Oh, she could grin and bear it, but come on. Was there any paper left in that office, or even on this floor? Had anyone here discovered the magic of computer files?
         Amy quickened her pace after hearing what sounded like a "Hold on." She could tolerate one prank, but no way was she accepting more paper. Inexplicably, she remembered her Grandad's words of wisdom at breakfast. "Don't let them blow smoke up your skirt." Hmmm, that puzzled her, but even more strangely she felt something pushing up through her skirt. Oh my God, it was wind, and she was falling. Had she stumbled? Ridiculous as it seemed, Amy pressed the paper tightly to her chest. Slowly, she realized she had left the building, and was hurtling through space. Great, I can't even flap my arms because of these stupid papers.
          With a thwump, Amy's rapid descent ended. As she struggled to draw a breath , the dazed woman recognized the interior of a dumpster. Grandad isn't going to believe this, my first day on the job, and I'm dumpster diving.
          "Hey," a voice shouted, " are you okay? Didn't you notice the missing window?" Squinting, Amy mumbled to herself, "I see that now." Sure enough, a man's head protruded from a gaping hole. This was kind of careless, negligent even for an insurance company. While she awaited her rescue, Amy considered her future. Not bad for her first day on the job, now she'd be promoted to claims. The first one she filled out would be her own.
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