Self-Pride and Humiliation

PROLOGUE: How fragile are you? How far do you think you're willingly to go to protect your ego?




HUMANITY'S GREATEST FEAR

         Does self-embarassment and humiliation leave you feeling alone and nakedly defenseless? Since the dawn of mankind, it seems like there's one sure thing that man takes more serious than anything... his self-pride and humiliation, which is seeming priceless.

         In the self-involved world of today, people's self-pride, egos and sense of self-worth is higher than ever, as they are willing to even kill or risk going to jail to keep harsh truths from coming out. And then once indicted they try like hell to try to get the lightest sentence possible, and although (I'll personally admit) it's refreshing to see some of our personal favorite celebrities get off with nonsense that they've brought on themselves that the normal everyday person wouldn't have gotten away with (admit it folks, we all got that feeling at one time or another), it's maddening sometimes to see how the rich get away almost whatever they want as they manipulate the judical system with their high-priced, hot shot lawyers.

         Look at our government and all their conspiracies and cover-ups. And then there's the crime syndicates (the mob, street gangs etc.). Such crimes are committed by both the rich and the poor, no one is immune as everyone tries to flee, if not from justice, from the humiliation of being exposed http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_conspiracy_theories.


THE CONVENIENCE OF LYING

         People lie all the time to business partners, friends, spouses etc. and in a lot of cases they claim that it's for the good of their relationship, or that it's business. Or have the nonchalant attitude in their head that "it's none of his/her business". If the premise to the movie "Liar, Liar" were to come true and there were actually a such thing as a 24 hour curse that prohibits a person from lying, we'd be in trouble. A lot of us would hang ourselves because there are so many relationships built on lies. The reason we lie is to get access to something we can't have. We are in immense comfort in knowing that no one knows the real truth except us (and naturally god and satan). But we'd be embarrassed to our diluted souls if the truth ever got out, because, if we're not sorry for our deed (and a lot of times we're not until way later on in life, maybe), the biggest of us can't defend ourselves in the light of embarrassment because it puts shame on us. It humbles us in the face of humility. Sometimes it's understandable to lie to keep from hurting someone's feelings or if it's to perhaps to save your job (and not at the expense of someone else's). But there's always that one habitual, tall-tales liar that lies just for the hell of it, and then when the lie is exposed, they'd rather lie til' the very end instead of owning up to the truth knowing that everyone knows the truth. No one likes being blackballed as an untrustworthy person, even if they did earn the branding because it makes future acquaintances skeptical as the liar's reputation exceeds them (like with most negative people). Sometimes when new friends are bonding, one friend may pretend to like certain things (music, movies, sports, etc.) more than what they really do because they want to be on the same level with the person that they're bonding with. It's fine to be social (you have to be able to socialize and network in this world), but if you have to lead a person on too much, they're probably not for you.


PUBLIC HUMILIATION

         Public humiliation taints our character. Celebrities who commit crimes, or who have simply become media fodder and are shunned by the public, works endlessly to restore their tainted careers: The Diff'rent Strokes kids; Britney Spears (though, able to survive her trainwreck); Lindsay Lohan; Tonya Harding; de-throned/ex-con sprinter Marion Jones; late 80s/early 90s musicians Milli Vanilli; and as of late, Bill Cosby, just to name a few. And child pornography, child abuse and murder scandals (R. Kelly, actor Jeffrey Jones, Michael Jackson, Roman Polanski, O.J. Simpson, Woody Allen, Phil Specter, Robert Blake, Robert Wagner, Eliot Spitzer, etc.) are seemingly the cream of the humiliation crop.

         Regular everyday people can be the subject of public humiliation too, take "The Maury Povich Show" for instance. Before the results of the paternity test are revealed, the woman is over-confident that the lying, no-good dog of a man is her baby's daddy. If the test came back positive, she becomes the beacon of free speech as she brags and instigates against her ex. But if the results are negative, then it's a 99.9% chance that she'll completely breaks down into fits of tears over the failure are public humiliation of not finding her child's father, especially if it's after her 3rd or 4th time, what a THOT (lol). And when there's no where else to go to escape the embarassment of the camera lights and the once joyous audience who was rooting with, but now laughing at her (along with her now relieved ex and his new partner), she finds solace backstage on a nice, cushy sofa to bury her head in and sob away a riverbed of tears.

         The same thing with "Cheaters" when the unappreciative cheating spouse or lover is finally busted, they're mad which is understandable, but the reaction differs from person-to-person. Some guilty parties are able to see where they went wrong after some time passes and are able to come to a compromise with their neglected partner. It would be good if all the cheaters could at least acknowledge their flaws but can't as they feel too embarrassed, they may act out on camera, but it's on spur-of-the-moment reaction. When it airs a few weeks later and they had time to calm down, they may be too embarrassed to even want to watch it knowing how they acted, and they would blame you and end the relationship (which was probably about to end anyway) claiming that instead of trying to talk things over, you've decided to get even and embarrass them. Public humiliation don't just have to be on TV either, it can happen at school, on the street, in the mall, even your friend's house when you're in the company of the people that you make the hardest efforts to impress. People, in most cases, are willing to talk things out (even if their answer is still no) to avoid public embarrassment.


SELF-HUMILIATION

         It's self-humiliation that taints our self-esteem. It's funny how that works. For instance, say a group of men attack and rob an innocent man. Now on the streets they're bad news, but half of the things that they do they can't publicly admit to, because it's within violation of the law. And they'll do anything to stay out of jail. It's funny how people hold on to their high maintenance sense of self-pride, but are unable to deal with the emotional repercussions from the outlash of an embarrassment, especially after being caught red-handed and being punished for it. And there's a self-embarrassment feeling to all of this because the person feels like they've failed to some degree and now their freedom is gone for whatever length of time. Self-humiliation builds up in most people when their on the losing end. From children on up we learn to lie to protect our freedom, protect ourselves from spankings, the punishments, and the overall humiliation of having to face our captors, our superiors, the law, our loved ones, etc. after being caught. Self-pride and stubbornness also kills a lot of relationships as we carelessly let certain friendships go (that probably weren't that important to us anyway as we lied and conned our way into and through them) over petty arguments, disagreements, a few dollars, or just casual long-term neglect.


A WORD FROM THE WISE

         In life we usually write a much bigger tab than what we're willing to, or are emotionally unable to pay. People are seldom strong enough to take what they dish out, and in most cases we always want a second chance, whether it's from the people we abused, or from god, because all good chances and opportunities are approved through him first. Another person's feelings is a serious thing folks, think of how low you feel when you're humiliated. Let's play fair people, there's a saying "What goes around comes around". (Karma does exist).




                             TIL' MY NEXT PIECE...
                                                 DAYDREAM, BABY!