My Normal

I’m worried, worried where my mind may take me, for years I have battled this.

Anxiety, a plague that hits and stays ever present and tormenting,

Hopelessly waking everyday with the same mind-frame yet yearning for normality,

Ironic is it not? That the one thing I seek is to be back where I once was,

Free-willed , full of life, loving, socially aware and outspoken.

That is my idyllic guise, a guise of normality, to feel that ever burning feeling of oxygen as it surges into my lungs.

It is not to be, my throat tightens, I cannot breathe, my heart races like herd of horses edging ever more towards the finishing post.

My palms sweat profusely, head in hands I’m convinced that this is the final stand,

“You’re going to pass out Craig! You’re going to die Craig!”

So I give in and take flight, running from my own mind yet it follows and always will .

Yet some time later I am back, stabilized, undefeated yet tired.

Another battle endured, I lost this one but I shall win the war.

Say hello to my normal.