Elgor e'Thrumm

Even at only 133cm I still had to stoop to keep from cracking my skull against the cold cast iron as I maneuvered through the retention ring separating the No. 33 feed pipe from the main trunk line. Dragging the long schlompf pole behind me I made my way to the stopped up secondary clarifier requiring my attention. I had just enough room inside the clarifiers holding tank to swing the pole around and start probing for the cause of the blockage. The dung black water rippled thickly around the legs of my nalex hip waders. Macabre shadows danced on the walls, cast to life from the dual beams of my helmets lamp. Methane gas bubbles pushed their way to the surface, releasing a heinous odor as they broke with an audible plop. My olfactory receptors, having become used to the smell long ago, only registered the noxious fumes if I let myself think about them. Finally finding the clogged inlet I let out a gleeful chortle as with a final push the impediment, which had been stopping up the system, gave way and a satisfying slurping sound echoed off the concrete walls.

I heard an amplified voice in my head say, “Elgor e’Thrumm, you’ve once again saved the inhabitants of Arius-34 from a most horrific outcome. We the Dwellers are eternally grateful for your service to our great city.”  Making my way back up the Tirian district feed pipe I could imagine the crowds roaring their approval as I was awarded the Silver Cluster Civil Award for my heroic work. I roared laughing at the lunacy of the scene I envisioned. My laughter turned into a wheezing cough causing me to lean against the algae covered pipe until I could finally catch my breath. Wiping my hand against my grey coveralls, I stood back up and smiled to myself before shaking my head and continuing on.

The idea the Dwellers of the city would ever award me for anything was beyond ludicrous and I very well knew it. To even be seen by a Dweller was unthinkable. In all my 34 years I’d never once set foot on the streets of the city. After all, I was a schlompf worker. A sixth generation schlompf worker to be exact, and while the Dwellers may look down on me and my occupation with disdain and loathing they also knew both were essential to the operation of their beautiful megalopolis. But I didn’t mind. Let them think what they wanted. I knew a truth that always kept a smile on my face.

The Tirian district being the central hub of Arius-34 also made it the home to the richest and most influential Dwellers. Being in charge had always been held as a great honor by the e’Thrum family and I did my utmost to uphold the mantle of responsibility my father had left me. I knew the schlompf workers in the other districts were envious of my position but I endeared myself to them by being humble and never lauding my position over them, just as my father had taught me as his father had taught him.

Hanging up my hip waders on a peg before entering the central collector I stood on the grated metal catwalk trying to make out the ceiling far overhead. I wondered as I often did if the Dwellers had any sense of what went on so far below them. I’m fairly certain that this world is much more a mystery to them than theres is to me. Cupping my hands to my mouth I yelled out, “I AM OZ… THE GREAT AND POWERFUL!” I chuckled as the chamber echoed back in reply. I had no idea who Oz was but after reading this expression, the only legible line on the back label of a discarded Vid box, I’d bellow it out every time I entered the chamber. I'm not so sure about the great and powerful part but I liked to think of myself as being this Oz person.

Entering the control booth I sat down behind the display monitors watching the readings fluctuate as the modulating central inflow pumps did their work. Their output passed over the automated skimmer sieves my grandfather’s grandfather had created over 140 years earlier. I noticed one of the sieve collector plates registered an item whose dimensions piqued my interest more than a little. Climbing down the access ladder leading down to the collector I wondered what new treasure might await me. Donning a pair of thick rubber gloves I pulled out the plates extraction tray. A quick rinse off under a hydro sprayer revealed what appeared to be a diamond engagement ring surrounded by emeralds. I couldn’t contain myself from doing a mirthful jig as I held up the ring. The overhead argon light glimmered radiantly off the multi-faceted surfaces.  Smiling I recited my fathers favorite saying, “One Dwellers schlompf is a schlompf workers treasure!”

Sealing the outer hatch to my offices anteroom I shed my soiled gear and thankfully entered the hydro-scrubber. The anti-microbial nano spray ensured a complete cleansing before I walked clean but naked into my office; which also served as my bedroom, kitchen, dining room and everything else. Opening my wardrobe closet I pulled on a pair of coco brown Dolier slacks and slipped into my favorite Perre Dumore satin lined slippers. With a Garrilente brocade robe wrapped around me I walked over to the food processing station. A sigh of contentment escaped my lips as I picked up the porcelain demitasse brimming with freshly extracted espresso. Sitting back in my recliner I took a sip, the liquid slowly rolling down the back of my throat. Well Elgor old man, I thought to myself, if only the Dwellers could imagine the day of a schlompf worker.

But no that would ruin everything.

(977 Words)