Barking For Fitness

My dog’s a tad bit overweight
At times a little lazy
Sometimes he sleeps the whole day long
His health, it makes me crazy

And then one day I saw an ad
This thing to help me track
It monitors what he does all day
And sends the info back

On his collar it attaches with ease
And records him when he’s playing
It tracks how long he snoozes and snores
What he’s doing and what he’s weighing

He gets points for achieving good fitness
And badges shaped like bones
I receive daily updated reports
On my computer, laptop and phones

At work I check online all day
To see what he’s been doing
I missed a meeting three days ago
The report I was too busy viewing

I wake up at night to check his sleep
And see what badges he’s got
Then I’m back online to check reports
Back to sleep, I find, I cannot

I’ve got it on Facebook, I email and Twitter
I want all my friends to behold
How healthy and fit my good dog is getting
How he doesn’t now seem all that old

Which made me ponder the results I was seeing
And how he seemed fitter than me
Perhaps I should borrow this tracker of his
Clip it on my collar and see

What fun that would be to get fit together
And both collect badges like bones
We’d share our reports and record our stats
Do I need to get him a phone?


Alas, once I slept, I decided the route
That I need to find one right for me
And track my steps, my sleep, my food
And get fit ASAP!