Poem of loss and hope |
I remember it like it was yesterday Running in the tall grass Smelling the sweet air Tasting the cool water Chasing the wild deer Without a problem But it's not like that anymore Not for my family Not for any of my kind And it's all because of you I was born in the Virginia wilderness In early spring On a hill overlooking a flowing river It was beautiful every season Chasing butterflies in the spring Rolling with my brothers and sisters in the summer Chomping on the leaves as the fell in the fall And sliding down the hill in the snow during winter It was wonderful That was until Father and the others couldn't find food The deer were getting scarce and we were growing larger Then we sensed you near our home So we left We were forced to move on from our land Our home Our beautiful hill overlooking a flowing river We lost some on the way Our babysitter, Luna And our elderly storyteller, Meeka We howled all night long Our sweet song floating through the winds But we had to move on Because we knew that you heard us We didn't even get to say our proper goodbyes And it was all because of you We got to where we thought we were safe The deer were plentiful And we grew old enough to hunt So my two sisters, three brothers, and I Along with Mother, Father, and two Betas, Amaro and Aleshanee Went off in search of a meal We were well off and there was more than enough for all Then you came and started taking our food But there was no where left for us to go So we stayed My sister, Kila, and brother, Neeko Were the first to go I watched as they starved to death And there was nothing I could do about it So Father, Amaro, and I sneaked onto one of your farms And stole an animal we weren't used to eating We killed it and brought it home to the others It was barely enough and we didn't like the fact that we had But we had to We had no other choice One night as we sneaked onto the farm One of you came bursting from your homes With something that smelled of fear It smelled of death Father told Amaro, my brother Juca, and I we needed to run But Amaro wouldn't listen Aleshanee had become ill and needed food And Amaro loved her and was a fool He went after the sheep That's when we heard it POW! It echoed through the night Shattering the silence Father told us not to look back So we didn't We just ran Father decided we needed to leave that night Even if we had to sneak past your homes We were frightened but there was no other way Aleshanee refused to leave She said she couldn't leave Amaro behind Father told her he was gone but she wouldn't listen We all left her even though we didn't want to And we howled to tell her goodbye To tell her we were sorry To tell her we would miss her And she howled goodbye back She told us she was sorry but Amaro needed her And that she would miss us too We knew that you heard us But we didn't care You could take away our home Our food But you could never steal our voice Mother told us Aleshanee died of a broken heart So now there was only Mother and Father Juca, Hanska, Nizhoni, and I left I was the alpha of the pups and had dreamed of a family Of owning a pack of my own Having my own pups That lived on a hill overlooking a flowing river But there was no hope of that Not a chance Nizhoni had often told us that she dreamed of finding a strong alpha male And having pups of her own As we traveled that night I could see the hurt in her eyes For she knew what I knew There was no hope We settled in a marshy land that we could barely stand in But it was the only place to go Father, Hanska, and I were hunting one night We were almost on a deer when a shot rang out from nowhere And pierced Father's chest Hanska and I stopped in our tracks Hanska cried for Father to get up I told him that I needed him and that he would be alright We could smell you coming closer and everything in us told us to run But it told us to stay too Father told us to go, to leave him, and take care of Mother He told me it was my job now So we left He was trying to feed his family Just like you have to feed yours So why, why did that make him evil Mother howled Her voice was low and painful We all joined in with her Telling you we were here That we were upset Telling you that we were hurt And asking you why you would do such a thing But you took as something to fear You took it as something to hate You didn't understand, you still don't understand That it is we that are afraid of you A handsome wolf from a neighboring pack came And courted Nizhoni She left after that to start a family for herself To go have pups To find a den on a hill overlooking a flowing river We were all happy for her So we howled our joy even though we were still upset Juca went on by himself He left in the middle of the night and never came back We tried to move Mother but she wouldn't leave We brought her food but she wouldn't eat We tried to bring her water but it failed She wouldn't have drank it anyway Hanska and I watched her fade away We watched her starve to death We stayed with her until her broken heart couldn't beat anymore Until her broken heart gave up on her Like she gave up on herself the night Father died Hanska and I traveled together We tried to get accepted into other packs But they were no better off than we were So we went on barely getting by Then Hanska got his foot caught in something metal I laid there with him until you all showed up Then I left my brother there in your harm So you all could kill him I was a coward And that left me with no one I wondered around a lone wolf On my own I saw Nizhoni and her mate once but I kept my distance She was happy with her three, bouncy pups And I didn't want to ruin that for her I came upon some meat It smelled of you I could smell the poison in it But I didn't care I was tired I had no one and nothing mattered So I ate it I drug myself in some bushes were you couldn't see me So you wouldn't be able to find me And show me off as if my death was some great accomplishment As I lied in the darkness all alone I began to howl I howled joy for Nizhoni and her family I howled worry for Juca I howled sorrow for Mother and Father For Meeka and Luna For Aleshanee and Amaro For Neeko and Kila For my faithful brother, Hanska I howled of tiredness for myself Then I howled for you I asked you why you would do this to us Why you hated us so Why you killed off my family and stole my hope I asked you what we ever did to you What was wrong with us? What was it that you had to fear? I howled and asked you why Then I told you how you had taken my land And my food And my family And my life before it even had a chance to start I told you that even though you took all of that You could never steal my voice And with that I shuttered and closed my eyes Forever Now I'm with my family And we are back on the hill that overlooks the river Running and playing Romping around like we were pups again Gathering to listen to Meeka's stories And rough housing with Luna Aleshanee and Amaro lie under the shade of trees together Neeko and Kila are my age now but we act as if we are puppies Hanska is with us and he has told me he is not angry at me for leaving him Juca and Nizhoni have not joined us yet But we will be a family again when they do Father and Mother bring back plenty of deer to eat There is always more than enough We howl and sing But never of sorrow We are only full of joy We are full of happiness Because we don't have to worry We have nothing to fear Because there aren't and will never be any of you You took our land You stole our homes You wasted our food You killed us off one by one But you could and can never Steal our voice |