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42 Life in Progress Now Preface Putting Your Life into Perspective I am going to make a prediction that this is not the first self help book you have opened in the hopes of finding a magic key or formula or words of wisdom that would forever change the direction your life is going in. In fact there is no magic key, no majic formula that works for everyone. The key to happiness is in our own perception of life and our place in it. Not that there's any one key aspect to life that will magically unlocks the door to a happy life, but when I reflect on all the people I have met along my own personal journey, there is one consistent quality that shines through: You live your life by the truths we tell ourselves every day. From the time we are born until this very moment, we are shaped by our experiences. It is how we internalize these experiences and the people who influence our lives that shape our perspective about ourselves and the world around us. Never underestimate the impact you have on your own life and those around you. You can chose to be a role model for yourself, your children, and the world around you or you can chose to be negative and focus only on the things that always seem to be going wrong in your life. Acknowledgments
I have questioned my own self-worth for years, it has haunted me from the deepest darkest recesses of my brain. It seeps into my soul at moments when I have no reason to dough myself. It is like a shadow that never quit leaves you alone, it follows you just waiting for a chance to sink itself into your heart and you soul. It makes you dough yourself and those around you. I have played devil's advocate in my head over the past years, wanting to desperately find a way, a magic formula, that would shape my perspective into the hopes, and dreams that I always wanted. When we are children we are told we can be anything we want to be but as soon as we try there always seems to be someone there asking us "who do you think you are?" you can not do better, be better, try harder, etc than me. These types of people are so afraid that you will be more than they ever hoped to be that they just can not let you rise above your past and reach for a future built on love, trust, devotion and yes sheer determination. You only wish is to be seen for who you are and what you do, but they all seem so inadequate when you relies you don't even know who you really are or what your true potential could be. So here is my question: How could we ever be good enough for someone else if we are not even good enough for ourselves? Who are we trying to be good enough for? What are we trying for? While I have a feeling you don't have an answer to this, just know you are loved and appreciated more than you could ever know.
Preface Chapter 1 Happiness is the Meaning and the Purpose of Life, the Whole aim and End of Human Existence." -ARISTOTLE Your life, your choice.
Your life, your right to change.
Your life in progress.
You live your life by the truths we tell ourselves every day.
Developing self-awareness by creating self-knowledge, reflecting on our strengths and weaknesses. Stay open to the possibilities around you. Do not close yourself off to the world for very long. Pay attention to your ????and intuition Dreams Hidden meanings Vision what you want in your mind first.
Say what you want out loud to yourself. Create a vision board Write it down and look at it often to keep it fresh in your mind but do not obsess over it. Do not get upset if someone does not notice the changes you are making at first. Remember they have their own life in progress and may not notice until they look up from their own chaos. Chapter 2 Clear the Clutter. I believe that our thought pattern leads to isolation and moments of deep despair. This is often manifested in our outward surroundings through our subconscious. We can at time mask the depression by hiding our true feelings deep within ourselves however; it still seems to find its way out. We can either live in a world of disappointment, chaos, and clutter or we can go to the other extreme and hide our insecurities by over achieving in our domestic, work, and home environment. It is the very nature of our being to want to hide what we consider to be our flaws and to bury our insecurities from ourselves and others. I do believe that we all deserve to feel a sense of accomplishment inn our lives and to find peace and tranquility in our everyday existence. Starting with our minds, our body, and our spirit. Establish simple habits that will keep the clutter eliminated. De-clutter your mind
Listening to music or even playing an instrument if you are so musicaly inclined is a great way to improve your mood and bring some tranquility into your life. I know one person who started playing his guitar and noticed a great improvement in his mood and his out look on life. I know for me that I do so much better when I go for a walk and listen to Pandora on my phone. With smart phones today, you do not need a separate MP3 player or other devices. Another friend takes 15 minutes to read the morning paper and drink a cup of coffee.
Have you ever been around a mother of father who yell at their kids all the time and then cannot understand why the children do not respect them or why they have disciplinary issues? It is really hard to respect someone, even a parent when they person does not seem to respect you as a person. It is an outward sign that that person (parent) do not seem to respect themselves. Sometimes the best thing for a parent to do is to rise above the stress and in a calm voice state what you want or need the child to do. This will not happen overnight, it may take several weeks or more before the child starts responding in a softer voice as well. De-clutter your environment Finding yourself starts with finding your space. Clutter seems to gain control over our lives. Clutter is always the outer expression of how we feel on the inside. You don't have to feel embarrass another day. Establish a daily routine to clean out your space and help maintain it for easy upkeep and maintenance. Keep in mind that your home did not become this chaotic or cluttered overnight and it will take time to get it decluttered and clean. I know you did not create this mess all on your own unless of course you live alone.I want you to quite whining and put on your big britches and just do it. That is right YOU. Not your children, not your spouse, not your cleaning lady, You. We spend so much of our time complaining about why someone else is not cleaning up the mess or helping out when in fact it is often easier and faster for us to do it ourselves. As tired and overworked as we already are, we must set the example for chance. Be careful for this is where resentment and anger will rise its ugly head and set our hearts will ill will and anger. I want to you to use your energy towards changing your environment and not to waste in towards anger and resentment. Once your family realizes that you are no longer yelling at them to help and they stare seeing a change in their environment thanks to you them will be more open to the changes taking place and will start taking pride in their home as well. Which will translate into them offering, yes I said it, offering to help. All your hard work will not go unnoticed or underappreciated. You can start with something as simple as your car will help set you on the right track. Starting with some easy to follow motivation you can start by cleaning out your car and keep it that way. You only need to start 15 minutes a day to get started declutter our mind, body, and spirit. Decluttering our environment is easy when you establish simple habits that can be done anywhere. Car Our car is often a second home to many of us. We use it to >>>>>>
5. Establish a day for going over your car. Fill it up, clean it out, vacuumed it out, wipe it down and shine it. What ever day works for you but keep in mind Fridays can be a very busy day at the car wash since most people will be cleaning their cars for the weekend. Home Office
Be your own source of inspiration. Being true to yourself, even when you do not know who you are you Finding yourself while being all things to all people Chapter 3 Putting yourself in perspective
Chapter 4 Looking Back, Looking Forward. "Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall." ~ Confucius
If life we tend to forget just how far we have come in our development and growth. It is easy to look at the now but it is important to remember that we have all reached goals or milestones in our life that at one time or another where only dreams or thoughts. Realize Understand Create
Finding things or patterns that work for you will help you reach your goals and streamline the efficiency needed to obtain those hopes, dreams, ambitions, and Realize Understanding that the flow of new ideas Creating new ideas from the old ones is not giving up, you are simply modifying your ? to fit the flow of new ideas into your game plan. To put it simply, Your Life is a Work in Progress...
Realizing what does not work for you is equally important in understanding why you have not reached your goals in the past or what maybe sabatouceing your success. Understand Create
Finding someone or something that motivates you will help keep you motivated and inspire you to reach your goals. Realizing the story behind there success will help you gain a understanding that truly successful people to not let their past dictate their future. They use their life evens as a catalyst for achieving their success. Realize Understand Create
Realizing and understanding that there is no one true way for everyone. There are examples all throughout history where people have experienced the exact same life events and yet there are those who rise above it and are successful in their own life. Realize that no everyone will have your best interest at hearth. Understand that everyone has issues of their own. Create Examples Thomas Edison's teachers said he was "too stupid to learn anything." He was fired from his first two jobs for being "non-productive." As an inventor, Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, "How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?" Edison replied, "I didn't fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps." As a young man, Abraham Lincoln went to war a captain and returned a private. Afterwards, he was a failure as a businessman. As a lawyer in Springfield, he was too impractical and temperamental to be a success. He turned to politics and was defeated in his first try for the legislature, again defeated in his first attempt to be nominated for congress, defeated in his application to be commissioner of the General Land Office, defeated in the senatorial election of 1854, defeated in his efforts for the vice-presidency in 1856, and defeated in the senatorial election of 1858. At about that time, he wrote in a letter to a friend, "I am now the most miserable man living. If what I feel were equally distributed to the whole human family, there would not be one cheerful face on the earth."
Chapter 6 Look inside yourself and realize that you are enough. Turn up the silence Turned down the voices Learning to be happy in your own company Questions to ask
Seaze the moment, day, week, month, year, Learning to embrace your fears in order to fully embrace the life you desire. Empty out the clutter Tune out the negative
"I don't believe I have special talents, I have persistence ... After the first failure, second failure, third failure, I kept trying." ~ Carlo Rubbia, Nobel Prize winning Physicist Do not let negative thoughts ruin your day. Try instead to use these negative thoughts in ways that motivate you and challenges the way you think about yourself and others. Thoughts of negativity rear its ugly head every day. "Great success is built on failure, frustration, even catastrophy." ~ Sumner Redstone Life is not fair. Try teaching that in school and you will quicky see yourself out the door. Well I'm here to tell you life was never meant to be fair. It is about the strongest link. Survival of the fittest for resources and ?? You can be happy even when things in life do not seem fair. There is something to be said for looking on the brighter side of life. While negative energy attracts negative ??Positive energy even in a negative situation will still attract a positive outcome. You may not see it right away but it is all in how you perceive it.EXAMPLES I've already made my choices so now I just have to live with it. We all make bad choices from time to time, some just more than others. But you always have a choices in how you handle theses decisions and if something is no longer working for you then you need to think of how to make it work or change the direction you are going in. Sometimes just changing how we look at the choices we made can change how they appear. Are you in a bad marriage? Do you fight with your spouse or feel unappreciated? Do you feel unloved or desirable to your spouse? If you could change one thing in the mornings and one thing before you go to bed at night it can chage your whole experience. In the mornings before you get fully awake say thins to yourself. "I am going to look lovingly at my spouse with not hate or animosity in my heart I am going to breathe in the essence of his smell and I am going to breath out all the hate and anger and mistrust". Do not tell your spouse what you are doing or why just do it. I have made too many mistakes in my past. Your past is just that, the past. It is not your future and while it is the past that shapes us into who we are today, the past does not dictate or rule our life unless we allow it to. You can turn your life around. I do not deserve to be happiness. Everyone deserves to be happy. No one is more deserving than you. That is not to say that you should only think of yourself but rather what will make you a happier person so you can live a life of peace and tranquility. I'm not good enough. Even if I try, I'll probably fail.My parents really screwed me up by...I can't change because I always find a way to mess things up.I always make the "wrong" decisions in life.Wrong guyWrong girl Wrong line of work Wrong Things never work out for me, no matter what I do.I'm not smartGood enough talented
Lighten your load
chapter 7 Body and soul. Engaging change in order to transform yourself. The only person you can change is yourself. You must let go of everyone else's expectations.
We are the choices we make today but we can change where we are headed chapter 8 Choices Crossroads Taken the first step
chapter 9 change
Shift in perspective
chapter 10
One step at a time
Chapter 11
Keep your sights on your dreams, goals, etc.
Challenge yourself daily
steps Wake up early Smiling in infectious You are not starting late in life. You have the rest of your life to catch up to where you want to be. References http://www.uky.edu/~eushe2/Pajares/OnFailingG.html all share: they belong to a community. Of course, everyone belongs to a community - even the unhappy - so I should go a step further and say that the key is to not just belong to, but to identify with and become engaged in your community. There's a great deal of literature to support the idea that people are happiest when they feel a sense of belonging. It's no secret that we are the most social species in the world, and a great deal of our development and evolutionary path has been dictated by our incredible ability to socialize. Additionally, people want to not only feel a sense of belonging, but also a sense of importance and meaning; having influence in their community provides them with both. It also stands to reason that when people exert effort to better their community, they receive all the wonderful gifts that come from giving and improving the world around them. What is most interesting about this idea is the word itself: community. Unless that awful party game/question came true and you're currently marooned on a desert island with only your top five albums, you belong to a community. Therefore, defining your community is the first step in truly engaging with it. - See more at: http://livehappymagazine.com/blogs/documenting-happiness/community#.dpuf 42 |