Rant about life.

         Over Memorial Day weekend I learned of a tragedy. A friend of my brother's who I would hang out with as well, killed himself. It was quite the shock. Over the last few years we didn't see him that much, here and there. My brother saw him more than me but he was the kind of friend that no matter how long you went without seeing him it would pick up as if no time had gone by.

         We got the news from my mother who called my wife. My wife instantly started crying. I didn't cry, not because I'm a manly man and don't cry( I can't watch Toy Story 3 because it would make me cry again) but because I was in shock. Why does this happen? What would make someone do that?
         I realized that the last time I saw my friend was at the wake of another old friend who had killed himself about 3 months ago. It's hard to think about.
My brother made a good point the other day. He's not sad about his friend dying, he's angry. Because of our friend was at that wake of the first friend, he saw what was happening, how it affected everyone else and he still went through with it.

         That is what got me thinking. About life, about depression, about death. We all have to go through tough times. It's a part of life. I'm not saying Deal with it, suck it up, don't be a baby. But find a way to make things better. The easiest thing to say is be with family or friends. Family always makes things better. Or your friends, a good friend will cheer you up when you need it or just be there when you need it.

          I know I just repeated pretty much what anyone would say about fighting depression. but if that doesn't work for you or you can't find someone to talk to at the moment. Think of little things. There is a lot of beauty in the world. Sometimes it just takes a look around to find something that makes you feel good. A painting, a song, a picture even something mundane like a rock or a seashell. It doesn't have to be something that special. I for one am a avid comic collector, I have a collection of over 5000 comic books. I also have a good stock of action figures, statues and artwork. When I feel down I walk into my office, sit down on the floor and just look around. I feel better. It's just something that takes my mind off my troubles and eases me.

          I know that this probably isn't the best thing ever written but it is what was in my head so I just sat down and started typing. Reading it over I realize it is kind of random and all over the place but that's how I'm feeling. I guess my point is: Life will get you down and may even try to kick you when your down, but you really can't let it get to you. Find a little thing or a big thing or a person or people. Hearing stories of suicides bum me out. It doesn't matter if it's a friend of mine or someone on the other side of the world. There is a lot out there that can be done to prevent that extreme of a act. I don't know if this rant will help anyone or if anyone will even read this but it feels good to get this down and out of my head.