Guitar Love - Resonance of Hearts Part 8

28 Sibling Dissonance

         The tour swung South for the end of summer.  This time of year they liked to take advantage of the warmer southern nights to play the last festivals and open air arenas before colder weather set in.  Los Angeles, Vegas, Phoenix, Albuquerque, Oklahoma City, Dallas, San Antonio and Houston passed by in the first two weeks.  Through the blur of cities and stadium lights every stage started to look the same.

         Despite the ruffled feathers on their last visit they found themselves once again spending a few days in the Fournier bayou home, where Remy-Louis' remains were finally laid to rest in the family burial plot.  Jay's family did their best to make up for the earlier rift, and made it clear that he, Daffy and the others were always more than welcome.  The fact that they had given Daffy's uncle Sean a place to live and work fixing and maintaining a nearby bed-and-breakfast and its surrounding cabins that the family owned meant a lot to both young men.

         They spent one afternoon and evening visiting with Sean in the cozy little cabin he had settled into next to a pretty bay.  They sat on his small back porch with cold beers and watched the sun go down over the water while Sean told them about meeting Luc Fournier for the first time.

         "Luc had come up to play a few sets with some musician friends where I used to go to play cards most nights.  Some of the local boys had been down to Orleans and heard him play and had invited him up for a visit just after his son was born" he gestured with his beer at Jay.  "He said he wouldn't have left just then, but he had had a huge row with his lady and headed out at the end of the fight.  Apparently, although he hadn't planned on starting a family at quite such a tender age, family was even more important to him than his music - but it wasn't to her.

         "The night I met him he was at the bar between sets and I bought us a round of drinks.  He had just had word from his family that she had dropped off their newborn son at the family home and taken off.  The Fourniers assured him the boy would be fine with them so he decided to stay a little while longer - the femme broke his heart when she abandoned you, son" he told the young Cajun.

         Jay shrugged dismissively.  "I knew the story before this.  Dad spent two or three months up North before coming home and Uncle Denis and his wife didn't want to give me up by then.  It was one of the reasons the whole family was unhappy with him for so long.  He insisted on raising me himself, even though he was a jazz club musician.  It was always just the two of us."  He kept his eyes on the setting sun on the horizon but accepted the fresh beer Daffy handed him with a nod.

         Sean scratched his chin thoughtfully and shook his head.  "I don't think you've heard the whole story before, son."  He turned to look at his nephew.  "There's more to the story for you too, my boy, though I promised never to tell it."  He sat back in his chair and took another swallow of his beer while the boys gave him curious looks.

         He sighed heavily.  "I offered Luc a place to stay while he was in town, as he needed some time to heal after Marie left.  Your mother Jenny had three small sons hanging from her skirts at the time and your old man did nothing to help raise them" he sipped his beer thoughtfully a moment.  "Sometimes I'd look after your brothers for a few hours so she could have some time to herself during the day.  After Luc's first week in town the boys got used to him and Jenny would sometimes stay to listen to him practice - she loved guitar music and wanted to learn to play herself.  He was happy to give her lessons while I played with the boys."  He moved uneasily in his chair.  "I wanted a family of my own as a young man but found out I could never be a father - so I became the favorite uncle instead.

         "Colin was involved in some nasty business at the time - and involved with another man's wife.  I think Jenny and Luc were both looking for a bit of comfort then, and I couldn't blame them a bit.  'Twas often I took your brothers out to wander the town or some such so the pair of them could be alone a while.  They were both lonely and hurting, after all."  He popped the top on another beer.  The quiet evening was suddenly a bit charged.

         Daff turned on his uncle.  "Do you mean to tell me my mother had an affair with Jay's dad?  A good, Irish-American wife and mother?  The family would have stoned her to death if they knew" he half-raised out of his chair in agitation, but Jay laid a restraining hand on his arm and he sat back down.

         "I don't think you're quite getting the whole of what your uncle is saying" Jay cautioned.  When the other man settled a bit he tilted his head thoughtfully.  "You and I were born just over a year apart, and I was only a few weeks old when our parents met...." he left the rest unsaid.

         Daffy's face clouded over and he got up and walked off along the bay shore for a ways.  He remained there for some time under the trees, watching the water and tossing stones.  The other men stayed on the porch and waited for him to calm enough to eventually come back and sit down again.

         "Are you telling us the truth, Sean?" he asked when he could finally speak.  He could barely wrap his head around the suggestion that his loving mother might have broken her wedding vows.  If what Jay had said was true, he didn't know what to think of it - blood brothers?  He was completely dumbstruck.

         Sean laid a steadying hand on his shoulder.  "Why do you think he was so hard on you, Declan?  Colin knew for a fact that you weren't his - you couldn't be, as he hadn't been to your mother's bed in quite some time.  He never knew who was responsible - besides himself - so he took it out on you and your mum.  Luc had already gone back home to his son when Jenny realized she was pregnant with you.  I won't tell you about what was said when Colin found out - or what he did when he found out I was somehow to blame for the situation - but after the dust settled nothing was ever spoken on the subject again.  Your mother and I did our best to protect you when we could.  I had to promise I would never speak of it, but I got a call from Katie telling me you had run off while I was in New Orleans, so I decided to break my promise and tell my old friend Luc about his missing son.  That's why I went into the club that evening looking for him.  I told you the rest of it over the phone."

         Jay took a philosophical outlook.  "I knew my old man was no saint when he was alive.  The women loved his Cajun looks and the way he played guitar.  Look at it this way, Daff - we've been brothers for over a decade - nothing's changed.  Unless of course you want to change your name to Devereux" he tried to lighten the mood a bit.

         "I'm not changing my name because your old man vamped my mother!" Daff snarled and leapt to his feet in fury.  He might have become violent, but just then his phone rang and he stalked off with the cell to his ear.

         Jay blew out a relieved breath as Daff moved out of earshot.  "Saved by the phone call."  He ruffed his hair and eyed the older man.  "We've pounded each other before, but this time he looked like he might not stop once he got started.  I knew my father well enough that I don't believe that he would mess with a woman, married or not, that wasn't willing, and I've already thought of Daff as a brother almost since the night we met.  For him it's got to be harder, because his mom was the only really good person in his life - besides you" he conceded "and she died violently when he was young.  He's gilded her memory and now it's been tarnished.  I imagine that since my old man isn't available to carry the blame that at least part of it will fall on my shoulders."  He shrugged resignedly.  "I can live with it if it makes him feel any better."  He didn't feel overly optimistic about the situation.

         Sean tried to console him.  "Declan will brood over it for some time, but he knows I've never lied to him.  Eventually he'll come around, don't you worry son."

         Daff returned to the porch, but didn't look any calmer.  "Sara called" he told them.  "She's pregnant again, and she's not happy about it."  He looked at Jay, a fine tremble visible in his large frame.  "She mentioned that neither of us have worn a glove when we've been with her since Alex was born, so there's no way of knowing yet which of us is the father.  Congratulations, 'brother'."



         Sara's violin wept tears of sorrow and frustration.  Everything was all wrong.  The guys were far away and fighting, Jay was pulling away from her, possibly for good, and she was stupid enough to get pregnant again and had no idea which of them was the father.  Empty rooms surrounded her and everywhere she looked there was something to remind her of the two men she loved and missed.  The violin sobbed, a heartbreaking, nameless melody.

         The pregnancy might not have troubled her so much, but she had only just recovered from her first one and had hoped to enjoy it a bit longer.  It was wrong of her and she felt guilty about it, but she almost hoped that Jay turned out to be the father of this child so she could keep him close to her, but she knew Daffy wouldn't be too happy about it.  The strings shrilled in dismay.

         She had spent much of the previous evening on the phone with him.  Sean's revelations had left him reeling and he hadn't known whether to laugh or cry or scream.  The violin keened in mourning that she couldn't hold him when he needed her.  She doubted finding out that Jay was his brother by blood as well as music would trouble him once he got over the shock of it - they'd been closer than brothers since they had met - but he had adored his mother.  The one kind and good person in his young life, who had taught him right and wrong, she had given him faith in himself and a desire to be better than he was.  His mother had shared with him a love for music and the gift of playing music with skill and passion.  It would take time for him to come to terms with the idea that his mother hadn't quite been the saint he had envisioned her as in his youth.

         The sighing notes of music slowly faded into silence and Sara opened her eyes.  Kate stood in the music room's open doorway with tears streaming down her cheeks from the heart-rending melody.  For some unexplainable reason Sara wanted to take a swipe at her sister-in-law.

         "Can't I go anywhere in my own home to be alone?" she snarled.  "Every time I turn around someone's breathing my air.  I wish everyone would just leave me alone for five blessed minutes!"  She was so agitated and miserable that she was gesturing wildly with the bow in her hand.

         Kate took a cautious step back into the hall.  "I was looking after Alex because I could hear you in here playing, but he's been crying for ten minutes and I can't get him to stop.  I'm sure he's just hungry, but I didn't think you wanted me to nurse him" she said shyly.  Their initial friendship had cooled over the last few weeks since the guys' last visit and she had tried to keep herself and Lucas out of Sara's way as much as possible.  Down the hall they could hear Alex's agitated cries from the nursery.

         Immediately Sara felt guilty for not paying attention to her son and rushed past to the other room to cuddle him and dry his tears.  She shed a few herself that darkened his ruddy hair while she sat in the rocker to nurse.  She felt bad about snapping at Kate when she didn't deserve it.  It seemed she was a roller coaster of emotions lately and she just couldn't find her balance.  At least Alex could always make her smile. 

         She looked up to find Kate hovering in the doorway like a timid rabbit that's been chased from its burrow.  Lucas fussed in her arms, not quite up to full steam but wriggling for all he was worth.  They had been sharing the nursery - mostly to restrict the dirty diapers to one room of the house - and it looked like the newborn was gearing up to needing a bath.

         Sara smiled apologetically.  "Don't worry, I'm done snarling for now.  It's safe to come in."  She watched the new mother scurry in and competently undress the baby for his bath.  "So many things have changed in the past year or so that sometimes it's hard to keep up.  Now I find out I'm pregnant again almost as soon as I've given birth and the guys are having a personal crisis clear across the country so I'm feeling frustrated and helpless and useless.  It's unfair of me to take it out on you - you're just unlucky enough to be the only one around when I feel like snapping at someone.  I'm really sorry."

         Kate gathered her growling son in her arms and turned to wink at her friend.  "Don't worry, Sara.  I'm used to rough treatment and I don't hold grudges.  Eventually I'll find my feet - and my backbone - in this place and you'll get back what you give.  Right now everything's still new to me and I'm a little unsure of myself and my place here.  I know you're not a mean person, and your bark is much worse than your bite."  She moved into the bathroom and quickly filled the baby bathtub on the counter.  Sara followed with Alex on her shoulder.

         "Is it true about Declan?" Kate asked.  She washed the baby with a soft cloth, smiling as he oohed happily at the warm water.

         "So I understand.  He says that your uncle has always been honest with him, and sees no reason why he would lie about it."  She cuddled Alex, who was cooing into her neck and pulling her long hair with his tiny fists.  "He wants to see a doctor when they come back for a blood test, but Jay got bent out of shape about it, so I don't know what they'll do, if anything.  They've nearly come to blows at least twice so far, and the other guys are keeping them apart as much as possible unless they're all together.  I don't envy the guys - I've seen the two of them fight once before, and wouldn't want to have to get between them."

         Kate wrapped her son in a soft towel and then emptied the bath one-handed.  "Do you plan on doing a paternity test for the baby, or just wait and see?" she asked hesitantly.

         Sara chewed her lip uncertainly.  "I was thinking about it.  If they do go for a blood test I might see about having an amnio done, but I'd have to wait until early December before the doctor would do it and the idea of sticking a big needle into my belly while I'm pregnant downright scares me.  I just don't know yet.  I'd rather wait if the guys are willing until the baby is born and they can find out in a few days without danger."

         She refilled the bath for Alex while they were there.  "How close do you intend to get with Jay" she asked in an offhand manner.  She had to wrestle for control of the washcloth, as Alex had discovered how to grasp a few days ago and loved the new game.

         Kate had intended to go back to the changing table for the baby's clothes, but turned back at the question.  "I'm not trying to steal him from you, Sara.  He's been nothing but friendly to me.  He looks a lot like Remy, but that doesn't mean I'm falling for his looks.  If he wants to be an honorary step-father for Lucas I'm happy to let him, but I know he belongs to you.  I'm not trying to poach."  She turned abruptly and left the room.

         Alone, Sara finished giving Alex his bath.  "Maybe you don't have to" she murmured worriedly.

29 Bruised Relations

         The southern leg of the tour ended in October, bringing the tourbus and its occupants back home for another short break.  At the clubhouse six ill-tempered and exasperated men disembarked and immediately went their separate ways.  Daff and Jay steered wide of each other, no longer on speaking terms.  Jay had called ahead before they arrived and so curved to meet a miserable Kate and Lucas at the Castillos' home while Daff went home to his wife.

         The mood on the tour had gone from bad to worse after Sean's revelations.  Daff resented the slur on his mother's memory and wanted proof in the form of a blood test before he would truly accept his uncle's story.  Jay had become angry that his father was being blamed for the whole situation and that he was being punished for it.  It hadn't helped the situation any that they had continued to argue after returning to the Fournier family home and Daff had flatly rejected their attempts to welcome him into the family after hearing the news.  The boys' feuding had even begun to affect their music onstage, which had the rest of the group in foul tempers.

         Sara was in the kitchen when she heard the back door slam.  Alex, who was napping in his baby rocker nearby, startled at the sound and woke with a cry.  She quickly gathered him into her arms to soothe his tears and stepped out of the kitchen to scold whoever had come in, but gasped in alarm herself.  Daffy stood by the back door, haggard-looking and with bruises on his face.  She rushed to his side and he wrapped her tightly in his arms, desperate to feel the peace of his own family again.  They didn't move until Alex squirmed between them, getting a good fistful of his father's hair and yanking energetically.  Laughing tiredly, he took the little boy into his arms and snuggled and tickled him as they moved back into the kitchen.

         The house was cozy and welcoming and smelled of good food - and Sara.  He smiled wearily when she brushed a feather touch over the worst of the bruises on his face, knowing she'd really stew when he took off his shirt later and she saw the rest of them.  It had been a mostly bloodless battle, luckily, but the others hadn't tried to come between them this time and he and Jay had pounded each other until they were both punch-drunk and weaving from exhaustion.  They hadn't spoken a word to each other in the two days since.

         "Don't worry, hon" he tried to assure her - and himself.  "We just need a couple weeks out of each others' hair to calm down.  Out on tour there's no way to avoid each other and every time I saw him it just made me mad again... it's not his fault, really.  This has been a really rough tour all around and it's taking its toll on all of us.  At least he finally agreed to the blood test."  He sat on the kitchen stool closest to where Sara was making dinner so he could touch her whenever she moved past.

         She laid a soothing kiss on his temple and looked him in the eye.  "Do you think the test is important?" she asked him seriously.

         He shrugged uncomfortably.  "I can't really explain it.  In theory I can believe what Uncle Sean said and I have no qualms about Jay and I being brothers.  It's just such a big thing to take on faith that I need to see it - the proof of it - before I can reconcile the childhood that I remember and the memories of my mother with what he told me."  He rested Alex's drooping head on his shoulder, patting his back to lull him back to sleep.  "Apparently the guitar that she taught me to play on and that I left home with is the same one Luc had given to her after teaching her to play.  I've still got it hanging on the bedroom wall upstairs where it won't get knocked around.  I guess you could say he taught both his sons to play..." the conflicting emotions he was feeling made it difficult for him to go on.

         Sara cradled his weary head and brushed tender kisses over his battered brow.  "You know this isn't the end of the world.  Colin is a brute and a bastard and you're better off that he isn't your father.  Your mom had a hard life and a harder end, but she loved you and you never need to question that.  From what I've heard  about Luc I'd say he was just like Jay is, so he couldn't be so bad a man and would have been a good father to you had he had the chance.  Do you think the two of you can make up in two weeks before you go back out on tour?" she rubbed his cheek comfortingly with her own.  "You know the Castillos are worried about you and Rowena told me the other guys are about fed up.  Make peace with your brother, or you'll have to answer to me when you come home at the end of the tour" she warned him and moved to take the bread out of the oven and slide her pies in.

         "And what about the baby" she asked when she turned back to him.  "Do you want me to have an amnio test when I'm far enough along to see which of you is the father?  Will it make a difference to you either way?  I don't want the two of you at war over it."  Looking down she laid a protective hand on her still-flat tummy.

         Daff wrapped an arm comfortingly around her waist.  "Don't you worry, sugar, we'll come to terms with it either way before the little one is born.  Right now I'll admit that I'm hoping it's mine, as Jay's been making noises about moving out this past week.  I hope he doesn't, but this is the biggest fight we've ever had."  He laid his head wearily on her shoulder and sighed.  "I'll try to work things out with him while we're home.  Don't hate me if I can't get him to change his mind, okay?  He's been wrestling with his own emotions for a while now because he's gotten a taste of family life and realized he wants one of his own."  He kissed her cheek comfortingly.  "He loves you - and us - but I have a feeling someday the right woman is going to come along and we're going to have to let him go."

         She rested her head on his dejectedly.  "I have a feeling the right woman already has" she whispered into his hair.



         Kate sat at the Castillos' kitchen table with a cup of tea, waiting.  Jay had called and asked her to meet him there, saying that he had something to discuss with her but didn't want to go home yet.  She wondered what he was up to and hoped there wasn't more family trouble brewing.

         He had called her every day they were on the road so she could share the highlights and troubles of her and Lucas' daily adventures.  He also enjoyed hearing the latest developments in the fledgling story she had started to write.  She wasn't too sure that it was any good, but he was very encouraging and he was right - if she didn't try she'd never succeed.

         With the ongoing tensions between the two men Jay had turned to Kate with his thoughts and frustrations, needing someone to talk to but unwilling to make Sara feel she had to choose sides.  They had spent more and more time lately on the phone or online getting to know each other and enthusing over the newborn's every new experience.  At his request she took daily pictures to share with him - Lucas taking a nap, in the bathtub, in deep contemplation of his hands - and she had started making a digital scrapbook of the best ones.  Sharing her son's life with the bassist helped her when other parts of her own life didn't go so smoothly.

         Over the past few weeks her relationship with Sara had continued to be strained.  Her brother's wife knew Jay called her every day and was becoming more and more jealous of their friendship.  Sara was also hurt and upset that he was pulling away from her and it made their relationship thornier.

         The back door opened and Jay came in, dropping his duffel bag by the door as he entered.  Kate gasped in dismay and leapt to her feet when she saw the battered cuts and bruises on his handsome face.  There was a small cut through one eyebrow to match the one he had gotten in their last brawl, a black eye nearly swollen shut and his lower lip had a nasty split that had been clumsily mended with butterfly stitches.

         Enrique cursed in Spanish and grabbed Jay by the scruff of the neck to push him into an empty chair.  Marcela got up with a sigh and a shake of her gray head to fetch her first aid kit, but it was Kate who took over cleaning and bandaging his wounds with a competence that spoke of long experience.

         "I see you've been practicing male bonding with Declan again" she observed coolly while her gentle hands removed the bandages and disinfected the worst cuts and abrasions.  She examined the swollen eye carefully, but there wasn't much to be done.  "Who patched you up - he did a lousy job" she commented drily.

         "Jerry's nursing skills leave much to be desired" he said with a dismissive shrug.  "Mickey is better at it, but he was busy with the big guy.  The others were trying to convince the venue manager that we wouldn't be needing a trip to the hospital and could still carry off that night's gig.  I'll admit, Ollie was more convincing than I felt at the time but we pulled it off - mostly.  The techs did their best to keep the stage lights off our faces - ouch!" he winced at the antisceptic sting.

         Both Castillos had reverted to full Spanish by this time, so Kate tuned them out.  "You're lucky I've spent most of my childhood patching up one brother or another - quite often the one we apparently share - so you're not in danger of losing your good looks just yet.  You can't be very smart to go up against him when he's lost his temper - he's been pounded on by Dad and our three older brothers since he was a boy but even Dad would back off if Declan started a fight once he got older.  It took three of them to put him in the hospital the last time.  You must have a hard head."  She brushed the hair from his forehead so she could apply ointment around the swollen eye.

         He gave a weak grin that put a twinkle in his eyes.  "Lucky for me, I do.  I've been trying to avoid him since he tagged me in the kidneys about a week ago, but he's not only a good fighter, he's got a mouth on him when he's mad and he knows how to push my buttons until I stop backing up."  He frowned thoughtfully.  "I'm faster than him but he's got more mass and a better reach and he's been spoiling for a fight for weeks.  When I finally gave him one the others stepped back and let us have at it."  He sighed, but his breath hitched a bit.  "At least he's been quieter the last day or two" he shrugged philisophically.

         "Well, give it a week before you play pattycake with him again, will you?  These things are expensive.  Stop grinning, you ape, and hold still" she flicked the tip of his ear in punishment and re-bandaged his lip when he was able to hold a straight face for more than two seconds.

         "Where's Lucas?" he asked in an attempt to distract her.  He looked around for the baby carrier and made an attempt to escape.

         Kate calmly pushed him back.  "He's taking his nap in the parlor, don't worry about him right now.  Take off your shirt so I can see how bad the rest of the damage is" she ordered him.  The expression on her face brooked no arguement.

         Jay stood for a moment and appraised the small, pixie-faced woman attempting to bully him.  There was no flutter in her hands and no give in her eye.  He could see she meant business and wouldn't take nonsense from the likes of him.  He gave the sigh of a condemned man and shrugged out of his long-sleeved shirt.  His exposed chest was peppered with dark bruises and angry furrows from the heavy ring Daff liked to wear.

         Kate shook her head scoldingly and gave him a push to plant his butt on the edge of the table where she could reach him better.  "You said that you're faster, but it doesn't look like you did much dodging.  Did you just stand still and let him use you for a punching bag?  Men are such idiots" she grumbled as he shied under her ministrations.  "And such babies.  He must have a badly broken finger if he did this much damage while wearing that big lump of a ring he likes.  Stop squirming, I'm almost done" she hissed.  "Are there any other boo-boo's that need my attention?" she pinned him with a gimlet eye, one hand planted firmly on his chest.

         He gave her a loaded look.  "There's one I'd be be tempted to let you kiss better, but Mama Marcela would turn me over her knee for it" he nodded toward the doorway as he shrugged carefully back into the long shirt.  The older couple stood with the cooing baby watching the byplay with great interest.

         He stepped over to kiss the wrinkled cheek.  "Sorry we've been brawling again, Mama.  You raised us to know better, and we do.  I give you my word that we'll make up again before we head out for the end of the tour, if Sara and Kate don't finish us off before then.  Would you watch the petit-enfant for an hour or two while I take la belle femme for a short stroll?  I promised Sara we'd go home for dinner, so we'll pick him up on our way back."  He tickled the baby under the chin to make him smile.

         Marcela waved a hand dismissively.  "Be off with you youngsters.  El hombrecito likes it here, don't you, mi corazón?" she cuddled the newborn to her ample bosom.  They went back into the parlor without a backward glance.

         Jay looked after them and raised an amused brow.  "Well then.  They don't need the likes of us here, do they?"  He offered Kate a gentlemanly arm.  "Shall we go for a stroll, ma chér?" he played up his Cajun accent a bit to get her to smile.  They headed out into the evening air, arm in arm.  Instead of turning toward the street he led her through the backyard and a gap in the back fence she hadn't noticed before.

         "Where are we going, Jay?" she asked.  "You said you had something you wanted to talk about.  Is something wrong?" unconciously she gripped his arm tighter.  She didn't want any more problems in their lives.

         "Don't worry, sweetheart.  Nothing's 'wrong' - although I won't claim that everything's 'right' either."  He paused a moment to gather his thoughts.  "When Daff and I fell in love with Sara it was just the three of us involved and the guys let us go our own way, even standing by us when the media tried to drag us through the mud.  Now he has Sara and Alex and we have you and Lucas.  Besides us Ollie's settled nearby, Ari and his lady have settled happily a short way away and Mickey and Rowena have their new home and a baby on the way.  Things change, and we have to change with them."

         He stopped to look at the house whose yard they stood in, bordered on one side by the group's clubhouse and behind by the Castillo home.  The stone-and-stucco two-story Mediterranean was a sprawling five-bedroom home, slightly run-down but light and airy with large rooms and lots of big windows.  It needed a little prettying-up but would be a good place to raise a family.

         "I don't know yet how things are going to work out for all of us, but I decided it was time to be responsible and take a step forward.  I promised you that I'd take care of you and Lucas... you're family, and you've both come to mean a great deal to me over the past few months.  I bought this house last week over the phone after giving the matter a great deal of thought.  You and the little guy should have a home of your own where you can do what you want, and I want to be a father to Lucas without hurting Sara's feelings - if I can.  Daff and Sara have a family now and it's time I step out of their way."  He shrugged dismissively.  "I know she's pregnant, but it's most likely his and I hope I'm right.  I'd like the two of you to live here with me, close to family and friends but with room enough of our own for peace and quiet."

         Kate looked from the big house back to the man beside her.  "You bought a house - for us?" She licked her lips hesitantly.  "What do you..."

         He put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.  "I'm not asking you to share a bed with me - not that it would be unpleasant" he grinned impishly "but we're still getting to know one another right now.  There's plenty of room for both of us without making you feel uncomfortable.  The spare bedroom off the kitchen or one of the upstairs bedrooms will be fine for me.  You and the rugrat are welcome to the master suite" he assured her as he unlocked the back door and let her precede him into the kitchen.  "You can do whatever you like to the downstairs" he said "but I'm claiming the two large rooms upstairs as a music room and guitar vault.  Everywhere else you have a free hand."

         Not that it would be unpleasant... well there, he'd finally said it, she thought as she looked around.  They had skirted that issue before as he was already involved and they really were virtual strangers.  She had been eight months pregnant and as big as a whale when they had met and he had been on the road for most of the rest of the time they'd known each other, but there had been some low current between them from the very start that she had tried not to think about lest she let herself yearn for him.  Not that it had helped, she thought morosely.  One of the thorns between her and Sara was that she envied the blond beauty her hold on Jay's heart.

         He handed her a set of keys to the house.  "I had the realtor leave the keys with Enrique and Marcela so we could get in when I came home - it looks like she's come in ahead of us, because I can smell the same lemon scent she always used to clean Daffy's house before Sara moved in.

         "The last part of our tour runs for two months and then we'll come back in mid-December for a long break.  You can move in now if you want to or stay with Sara while we're gone... or decide you don't want to move in at all.  I understand if you'd rather stay with them instead.  I hope you'll make your home here, though, whatever else happens.  You can ask the others if you're nervous about sharing a house with me, but there's no need for you to be worried."

         He laughed self-conciously.  "I think I'm babbling, but you keep looking at me with those big green eyes and not saying anything.  I'm not bringing you back here to eat you, Kate.  I wasn't a big bad wolf even in my youth.  You're safe with me."  He tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear, tracing a butterfly-caress along the curve of her face that made her blush pinkly.

         She rose on tiptoe to brush a shy kiss on his cheek.  "Thank you - for everything.  I'd like a couple days to think it through.  I'm not sure I want to stay here alone, but maybe I'll come for a few hours a day to go through the house and  to think about colors and such.  Rowena will be a help, I'm sure.  Right now it's comforting at night knowing she and Sara are in the house and I'm not alone, but when you finish your tour I think I'd like living here.  Lucas and I will be waiting for you to come back."  Butterflies were exploding in her stomach but she didn't lower her eyes from his.

         He pressed a chaste but seductive kiss on her slightly-parted lips, inhaling her surprised sigh, then went back for one more taste before backing away, hands in pockets.  "We'd best fetch the bébé and get back.  Sara already wasn't happy that I wanted to see you before coming home for dinner.  If we're late we might not get fed" he grinned and led her back outside.



         Sara had the table set for dinner when they heard the back door close.  Daff looked up at the sound and pulled Alex onto his lap as a protective shield while she wasn't looking, knowing she would soon want to smack him or worse.  Suddenly he wished the rest of the band were there for dinner.

         "Um,..." he hesitated.  "Honey, you know that Jay's tougher than he looks...." he trailed off when she glared at him, hiding behind his small son and soothing his still-aching hand with the bag of ice she had fixed him earlier.  He winced when he heard her gasp as she caught sight of his brother's battered face.

         She came back into the dining area dragging Jay by the arm like a mother with a delinquent son.  Sparing her husband a single frosty glare she ripped open the other man's buttoned shirt, exposing the rest of the damage to his lean body.  The bruises and marks disappeared into the waistband of his jeans.

         Sara looked at the mess for a moment, breathing through her nose in an attempt to remain calm.  She looked up into his blue eyes, and saw the wariness and the fear that he'd be the cause of a major blow-up within their little family.  She sighed, all of the fight going out of her at the vulnerableness in the strong face she loved.  Gently she kissed his stubbled cheek and folded him in her arms.  She just couldn't be angry when they were hurting.

         "Are you ready to make up and be brothers again?" she whispered into his ear.  He had buried his face in her hair, needing the comfort and forgiveness.

         His arms tightened a moment around her.  "I never wanted to fight in the first place, but he needed to - he was hurting so much.  You know we share everything, good and bad."  He kissed her forehead tenderly and stepped back.  Kate hovered uneasily behind him with Lucas in her arms, worried for her friends and her brother.

         Sara turned to her husband and laid his head to rest on her breast.  Safe in her arms he could finally let the hurt and misery go.  "No more fighting" she turned his face up to look at her.  "Can you work things out between you?" she asked him.

         Daff nodded against her soft skin.  "No more fighting" he agreed.  "I needed you to keep me whole, and now I've got you.  We'll be alright, sweetheart."

         He peered over the swell of her breast at the other man.  "You look better than you did on the bus - did Mrs. C work you over?"

         Jay shook his head, slinging a friendly arm around Kate's waist.  "No, I've finally found my own nurse.  She's combat trained and mopped the floor with me" he grinned playfully.

         His face sobered as he moved on to other business.  "I bought the house next to the clubhouse" he told them.  "It needs a bit of pretty work, but it's liveable.  I'll let Kate decide what she wants done to it while we're finishing up the tour, then we could use an extra hand with a paintbrush" he looked for Daff's okay and was almost surprised to get it.  "There's plenty of room upstairs for my guitars once the rooms are repainted."

         He caught the shine of unshed tears trembling on Sara's lashes and reached out to wipe them away himself.  "Don't cry, pet, you'll break my heart with your tears" he kissed her cheek.  "I'll only be one house over and you'll still see me every day when we're home.  Kate needs a place of her own just like you have, hon.  When the tour ends in December we'll settle in and Mickey and Rowena will be nesting - you and the big guy will finally be able to spend some quality time together without all of us underfoot."

         Sara sniffed and rubbed her eyes, trying to pull herself together.  "Don't you love me anymore then?" she asked forlornly.  Daff set his son back into his feeding chair and pulled her onto his lap.

         "Enough to finally step back and let the two of you be happy together" he answered firmly, leaving no room for debate.

         "And what do you want, Katie" Daff asked his sister, who had put the baby down so she could finish bringing the food to the table.  "Are you sure you want to move in with this slick alligator?  You've got a home here with us as long as you want it, hon."

         Kate waved a dismissive hand in their direction.  "I'm not worried by the likes of him.  You taught me yourself how to handle troublemakers - if he gets out of hand I'll just have to show him who's in charge, then patch him up again.  I'm looking forward to having a home of my own where I can make decisions and do as I like.  I appreciate the two of you giving me a home here, but I'd like the chance to build my own.  I can handle the roommate" she assured her brother with a saucy toss of her head she hoped hid the butterflies in her stomach.  "We should eat before the food gets cold."