Does Birth Order Really Matter?

"... they shared the brotherhood of the firstborn, which can be both blessing and curse; the overwhelming adult attention to the details of their lives and development; the expectations that run too high; being the bridge between adults (parents) and children (siblings); one foot in either place and the accompanying hollow lonely feeling of being nowhere" (otto, 153) There are four birth order groups; they include the first-born child, the only child, the middle child, and the youngest child. The number of years between children, the gender of the child, physical differences, disabilities, or medical needs of the children, family structure, and the birth order the parents grew up are many factors within a family. The order children are born within a family influences who they grow up to become.

The first-born child is often the achievers of the family. Growing up they had the important role of being the first-born child of their family. They had that one on one interaction with their parents. Everything they did or accomplished was fully recognized. Parents often spend more time with the child first born within the family. The first-born child tries to please the parents because the parents have a high standard for there first to succeed which can make the child feel extra pressure in comparison to their younger siblings. They may be become very conscious and have strong attention to detail. Children born first often are relied on by parents to look after their younger children, which make them dependent. They are viewed as the leader, which in return increases their confidence. Children born first often are subjected to stricter rules growing up then their younger siblings.

The only child is the child who is stereotyped as spoiled, but often lonely child. An only child born often wants someone to play with, whether it is a playmate or a friend at any given time. They don't have the benefit of having someone to interact with on a daily basis, or someone to share their toys with, or to play with. Only children social interaction is often with adults, which also can improve strong language skills and develop creativity and imagination. Parents of an only child usually have more money to spend on things that larger families aren't able to afford which can stereotype the child of being spoiled. Children who are the only child in their family are often subjected to high expectations and pressured to do well in life because they don't have siblings to pick up the opposition for when they don't succeed to their parents anticipations. Only children might even have higher goals and higher expectations then those who are a firstborn.

The middle children are often the one who feel like they don’t fit in. The middle children often aren't the center of attention. They have the least pictures taken as they grow up, and are often the ones who don’t get as much attention as their siblings. They often don’t get as much one on one attention and may feel unloved. They may also take the role as the mediator to avoid conflict, and may be the one to stay out of the spotlight, avoiding attention being shy. Some middle children feel the need to compete with either an older child or a younger attention in order to fit in. Some middle children are independent and loyal to peer groups growing up as a way to fit in and feel wanted.

The youngest child is also the child who will often get away with more than any other birth order. The youngest child is often known as the one who is the most affectionate and the one who can get away with the most. They can act out and get the attention they want without much, if any negative reaction. They often develop undesirable traits such as being overly critical, temperamental, inpatient or impulsive. Often parents rely on older siblings to entertain the younger sibling because they reached the relax stage in parenting. Youngest children often depend on their parents or older siblings, have difficulties accepting responsibility our making decisions on their own, and often are not independent individuals.

Our gender, several years between each sibling and other factors also have an impact on how we grow up, our personalities are shaped and our success in life. One of the greatest influences is our birth order. Eldest child are often high-achiever, conscientious and determined. Only children are often creative, perfectionist, and have strong language skills. Middle children are often outgoing and generous. The youngest child is often the one who is most affectionate, center of attention and lacks maturity. The order children are born within a family does have a role in whom, they become as a person.