1st

I found myself walking by some wet street with weak streetlamps. It had just been raining, of course, yet it didn't feel that cold. Probably because I was wearing my furry coat. I'm not the kind of person who just walk into bars at 11:30 p.m. all alone. At least maybe I know the place or something. I don't think that was the case. I sat on the bar chairs, the one that is almost at the end. There was this liquor and smoke smell, exactly what you would expect from a bar, and it was mostly crowded by men laughing too hard, a little old I'd say, but there were not mean drunks pulling out their knives at sight. Yet. The barman looked at me expectant for my order, although he didn't say anything. "Just a beer, please" I told him, "dark beer" I emphasize. He gave me a funny look and then proceeded to get my beer. He was probably wondering what a girl who looked like me was doing there by herself on a Saturday night. I'm sure I didn't look like I was waiting for someone to meet me. I looked around; yeah, there were no girls around. Oh maybe a couple, but they were with a group of men and, to be honest, they looked like they were charging by hour. That didn't bother me. This city was full of scum, but who was I to judge people's "occupations" anyway? I had just being fired. Well, not technically, but I was unemployed. The little bookstore I worked at had just closed to move to some other city. They offered me to follow them but the place was outside the city. Like in the suburbs. Yuck. Besides, moving out just because a job like that? It's not like I've never been unemployed. I always find something. It was never the less, the longest job I've had, because I really liked it. The pay was decent and the place allowed me to read all I wanted. There were mostly second hand books. And not a lot of people got there, so it was never crowded, so it was like they were paying me for doing nothing all day besides something I liked: read. They had a few good titles.
The sign caught me by surprise that it was like it was reading my thoughts. I laughed at myself quietly. It was a vacancy sign for bartender. I noticed it didn't say it was exclusively for girls, because well, everyone knows what that means.
-Is that still open? - I asked the barman, a short sort of bald sort of fat sort of old man with a thick mustache.
-Yeah, I put it yesterday. Why? Are you interested?
I shrugged. Then I asked for another beer.
-Well, I'm unemployed at the moment. I thought I might be helpful - I told him when he put my second beer on the bar.
-Hmm - he looked at my more carefully this time -how old are you?
-Twenty-one. I know I don't look like it but I have and ID - I smirked.
-Okay, I guess we could use someone like you, it's not like waitressing really, it's just being at the bar.
He asked me a few questions about my past jobs and my current residence, oh and my name of course. He told me I could call him Freddie.
When I finished my beer I put the money on the bar and headed out waving at him. "I'll see you tomorrow, Annie" he said. I liked him, he didn't seem like a pervert. He just seemed like a bartender slightly bored with his life. And the place was familiar to me. I probably already been here a while ago. Oh what the hell.
When I got home I couldn't believe I asked for a job as a bartender. That was really not me. I had been a waitress a couple of times but a bar? I would probably get killed and raped on my first day, so I proceeded to go to sleep with those happy thoughts.
The next day was rather boring. Freddie taught me how to make all things a costumer could ask me for, but it was scotch with ice more than anything. You'd never see someone asking for a margarita in that place. I was a bit surprised for the amount of drunks that night. I mean, costumers. You would think people have better things to do on a Sunday. A few of them kept starring at the, the ones that were by themselves about all, but surprisingly not all were disgusting old men. There were even a few who didn't look bad.
Everything was mechanic. My turn didn't start until five so I could go to the laundry and buy some food at the market. I even dared to clean my place a little. My little place.
I have always been a person who despises routine in a long term. Of course, you always have to deal with routine, like when you go to school or when you have a job, or when you do anything you like to do on a certain schedule. Who wouldn't live with routine? Only celebrities, I though, maybe. The thing was that when routine started to make me feel trapped and like my life was fading out, I just had to find myself another job. Or start wearing high heels everyday. Or get to the usual place I went by another way, a longer way. I even started taking cooking classes once.
That didn't bother me. It was not like I did crazy stuff, those were just random subtle changes on my life. Like right now, at the Pub. Yeah, that was its actual name, or at least how everyone called it. It was probably the largest bar in that town, the west side of the city. The huge grey city. Downtown of the city you could surely find bars twice as big and so much fancier and cleaner but I kinda liked this one. It was close to my flat anyway. There was this other bartender, Freddie's wife Ellie. Her hair was extremely dyed and she was always wearing too much make up, but she was nice. She was there all the time, she just told me she was glad she'd have someone help her now with the happy hour on Fridays.
Monday was alright, so did Tuesday. I was again surprised by the amount of people during the work week, but we did fine. On Wednesday I was adjusting the cups when a soft voice asked for bourbon. I turned and smiled at a guy that looked about my age. I gave him his glass and he said "thank you" with the same soft, dark voice. He was wearing a green long coat that looked dusty, with the hoodie on.
I didn't realize I was so concentrated on him til someone called me from the other side of the bar. The bar suddenly got almost empty and I was just mechanically cleaning it. Then the hoodie boy asked me for another bourbon. When I gave it to him I noticed his hoodie was down. His hair was black and extremely messy but that just made him look more like a kid. He was concentrated in his cellphone. Wait, was that a cellphone? It looked ancient. He drank all in one swig without taking his eyes of the phone and asked for another one. I slowly gave it to him and couldn't resist saying "hey, don't drink it so fast this time". He finally took his eyes off the phone and looked at me with a grin. "I'll try" he said as he started drinking very, very slowly still looking at me. And still kind of grinning. I didn't realized I was smiling at him, probably with the same grin. Someone called again from the other side of the bar and I had to force myself to go. When I was standing reasonably close again, but without looking at him, he started speaking to me.
-How old are you, anyway?
-Who? Me?- I finally looked at him and found him laying on the bar with his arms. That coat was too big for him.
-Yes, you- he said laughing lowly. I felt like an idiot.
-Uhmm, twenty-one, why?- I was still trying to sound detached.
-Hmmm, you just look too young to be judging people's speed to drink bourbon, I almost bet you were underage and call the police- I gave him a dirty look but my mouth couldn't help twisting up. Now I really saw him. His face was really pale and had big dark eyes that looked tired. His hair was a mess and still had some of the ends wet because of the rain outside. He looked my age, really but his coat deprived me to see his complexion. That was one enormous coat.
-You're the one to talk- I said looking at the bar again and pretending to clean. Why was it uncomfortable to look directly at him?
-Oh, I'm much older than you think- he said opening his eyes more but looking at his hands.
-Can I get you another one?- I asked looking at his empty glass.
-Please- he said squinting. What a weird boy.
When I gave him the new glass I noticed the place was almost empty. I looked at the clock up on the wall inside the bar, five to 3:00 a.m.
What was a guy like that doing there at that time on his own? "Oh shoot" I said, my turn was over, I started taking the black leather apron off. When I looked him he was starring at my clothes. Was he checking me out?
-You have to go?- he said laughing at my urgency.
-Kind of- I said collecting all the empty glasses on the bar.
-Yeah, me too- he said putting money on the counter and headed to the door. Was he smiling? He put on his hoodie again and walked head down. He was tall. More than I expected. Finally I came back to reality and said bye to Ellie with a smile. I got out by the back door on the alley and headed for the main street. The music was still on and people kept arriving as I passed the Pub's front door. It was WEDNESDAY, what was wrong with that people? It was a big city after all, and the west side was definitely where the worst people lived, including me. And by worst I mean people who goes to a bar at 3:00 a.m. on a Wednesday. The pavement was all slippy because of the rain but that gave it a certain glow. I liked that. I was all absorbed in my thoughts that I didn't realize I was walking by this alley I usually avoid. Is easier to get home by it but I only used it during daylight. At 3:00 a.m. was definitely not my first choice. But I was halfway through so it would've been stupid to turn around. I just kept walking head down, imitating the cute boy at the bar and trying not to look insecure. Did I just called him cute? I asked myself. Only in your thoughts idiot, keep walking. When I got to the corner there was a bunch of people reunited, it was impossible that they didn't see me, so I just really, really hoped for the best. They surely looked like drug dealers. I noticed a few looks but that was it. No one is following you, quit being so paranoid, they probably have better things to do, like selling drugs. Then I felt a hand on my shoulder and I almost scream. I startled and immediately turned ready to kick someone in the crotch and run as fast as I could but instead I freezed. It was the cute boy from the bar, I mean the boy from the bar.
-Hey- was all I could babble.
-You shouldn't be walking around in here at this hour dressed like that- wh.. wh?
-Dressed like what?- I raised my tone and frowned at him. He rolled his eyes.
-Where you going home?- I didn't notice we were already walking down the sidewalk.
-Yeah...- I said still looking strangely at him.
-Where do you live?
-Where do I live? Should I tell you that? I don't even know your name- we stopped.
He looked disgruntled but finally said "Jack" opening his eyes as he looked at the pavement.
-Okay Jack, thanks for the advice but I'm afraid I must go home now.
-Will you tell me where do you live now?- he looked tired again.
-Just around that block- I pointed.
-Nice- he said looking disgusted. That annoyed me.
-What?! Where do you live, anyway?- I said still feeling insulted. My flat is my flat.
-Oh, should I tell you? I don't even know your name...- he said with a low laugh, quoting me.
-Annie- I said still frowning.
-I guess that was a predictable name- he said as if he was talking to himself.
-What? Now you have a problem with my name?- why was he annoying me so much? He continued laughing.
-No, not at all. It fits you.
Okay, was a random guy I met at a bar that same night walking me home at 3 a.m. and saying my name fitted me?
When we got there I turned around and starred at him. Have I been frowning all this time?
-Where did you come from?
-What?- he looked confused.
-At the alley, I didn't see you walking by there. And you were suddenly behind me.
-Oh I was with those guys, in the corner- he looked embarrassed and kept looking at his black shoes with laces.
-Oh you were with those guys? Were they mugging you or something?
-Do I look like I could get mugged?- his voice sounded offended.
-No- was all I could say. WHY?
-You, on the other hand, should really stay away from there and from them. Couldn't you walk by the main street?
-Why do you care?- I was frustrated.
-I don't know- his eyes looked vacant staring at the street.
That night I put Françoise Hardy on my turntable and listened to it til I fell asleep.
Thursday was my free day that week. I made eggs benedict that morning. I went doing some serious shopping for the month. And I kept singing Françoise Hardy all day long.