Life Gives You Twists

         “God didn’t give us pain to hurt us God gave us pain so we can conquer it” I was thinking all morning long wondering of what the lady meant.  I had moments when I zone out to my little world where I can think the impossible, but today the thing the lady told me from last night had me thinking.  As the morning went on it wasn’t no typical Monday morning everything wasn’t going as usual I opened the windows to get a fresh smell today it was like a rotten skunk the clouds  were shadowy and it was already seven in the morning, and yet the shiny sun hasn’t arise , but I had to hurry no more thinking I was running a bit late to work.  I went downstairs to my happy family but then again I first had to get the newspapers that’s the boy throws in the morning (I had been working for magazine industry so I had to see what was new every day in fashion) I was speed walking to speed up things faster but I trip over a dead bird “poor thing didn’t deserve to die like that, if only we had more than one life” getting back inside seeing the family in table eating breakfast with their smile in their face made me think that my hard work was paying off everything I do is for their happiness. 

         The morning went on when a sudden loud yet anxious sound came from outside as if things were disintegrating we rewarded no attention, and went on  “OH!  not again am late my boss is really going be on a mad mood” I grasped my stuff gave a hug to everybody, but as hugging mom the house gave a unscrupulous shake, and my dad immediately gave commands to everybody to stay seated while he departed to check what was going on I tagged beside to help out I was the one the though fest one of them all . We sprinted outside not knowing that leaving the family inside not sheltered was the most horrible idea we could have thought of, and once more another shake happen this one drop nearly all the houses we concealed to save our life’s  “Julissia stay here and do as I say I must go in and risk my life but for my family am willing to do much more if I don’t come back come for them” dad had enough courage to do that for us he showed me the loved  he had for us “Dad! Run as fast as you can”  dad got up I just peeked a little to see, but It was too late the house had already collapsed on top of my family everyone and everything was gone “No! Why my family god I imparted they didn’t do no harm or sin to the world they deserved to live longer.”

         Still the grief we had of seeing everyone lay there just dead, yet still smiling at their worst moment made me see I had a strong and unified family. “Julissia come we have to leave as much as it hurts we have to save our life’s pack the most important things will need.” At that’s precise moment I haven’t been thinking clearly but then I seen my proposal ring, and flashbacks of all the memories me and my fiancé Alex  had came to me I knew he was also thinking of me , but I couldn’t distract myself I had to be on point and help dad. “Dad before we leave can we say goodbye to Alex incase I don’t ever get to see him no more” I suggested “ Are you out of your mind you just seen what happen to our family now to look for him were risking it more. NO!”  That’s same day they’re more than a thousand families’ trying come up to a safe place “Dad? Is everything okay?” he answered, but I didn’t quite understand because we was crying “I…I had rather wanted me to be dead instead of them” , but dad you know people say god does things for a reason he may wanted them not to suffer like were suffering now “NO! Jullisia theirs  no more “God” he doesn’t exist he no longer allowed in this family” but I replied “if he gives problems he has to give solutions.”

         I don’t remember the days we been walking I lost count so many days of walking everyone was very exhausted we had  no food, water, shelter just miles of desert ahead of us. That same day I had been getting this feeling someone was following me  I must of already had lost it but today was weird, I heard someone shout my name “Juliana!” I look very surprised because no one knew who I was besides my dad the echo went on for hours until I started to wonder around. The same thing happen later on the week but this time it was a men following me I had seen him somewhere “Juliana it’s me come I missed you so much” the voice started to uncrack ‘was that him is it really Alex!”  he was just standing two miles away from where I was with my father, but my father didn’t let me go “Come on dad please I listen to you at first but let me be with him.” That weird noise went off again as if planes were crashing and bombs exploding, but I pay no attention I was getting closer to him “OH! No Alex move out the way” a plane going up an a hundred was coming directly Alex way with a force that can knock out any building.  He didn’t hear me the plane noise was loud , and then that were it all happen right at the spot he got killed right in front of my eyes my heart sink bellowed my knees  I had the biggest knot In my throat I didn’t have the words to explain how I felt of his death.

         I try acting brave but in the cold dark sorrow nights I would cry till the bright light up the sun would come up. All this pain was to much seeing people die in front of you is something many people cant take in so they talk about it , but my dad wouldn’t only tell me “you have of be brave and take it all in like I did we the death of our family.” Dad himself wasn’t doing no good in health he cough last week and all he would cough was blood last night he had these weird panic attacks , but he didn’t want to rest  I was pretty much scared that I was going end up being on my own.

         Day seven nine my dad was still asleep I let him rest he was exhausted the night before he finally cried with me and admitted it was hard to keep everything inside you , but the day went on it was around six thirty, and yet no answer I was started to get worried “dad wake up its time to keep going remember we don’t want to walk at night” no motion at all I started to feel a bit fright I checked his pulse besides his neck he was cold and his heart beat didn’t pulse my dad had departed on us.  I was all alone all my loves ones had died I had no reason to live, but I couldn’t die out on all the ones that once look up to me I had to keep going “dad was right theirs no god” because if their was one why did he make me suffer so much “did I deserve to take so much pain like this?”