Alien Invasion

            As I reflect back on my life, I realize that I have had a pretty vivid imagination.  I lived in a neighborhood with almost no children, which was devastating, especially to me as a child.  I was always stuck playing by myself and coming up with ways to keep myself entertained. Sometimes, I would go over and talk to my “one armed neighbor”.  I found out later that he got stabbed in a knife fight and lost the ability to move his arm.  Other times, I would try and ride our dog around the yard, create mud slides in my backyard, play school, or act like a super hero.  However, I still recall when my imagination took over and caused me to get in a wee bit of trouble. 

I was about three or four at the time.  I just saw some alien shows on television, so I knew that they had to be real.  I knew they were waiting to attack earth and figured they would send someone to get things ready for them.  Yes, I had a pretty complex imagination, but remember, I really didn’t have anything else to do.  I figured it out: they sent one of their comrades named Chuck to come live by me and act like my neighbor. At my age, I thought it was the perfect situation; everyone would be thrown by his superb acting ability and his amazing disguise as an old guy.  To my disbelief, this would also include my very own father.

I knew Chuck was an alien because he rarely came outside, and when he did, it was to yell at his garden. I determined normal grown-ups would never do those kinds of things, and I had to stop him from sending his alien brethren to destroy earth. I knew I had to put the world on my back and save it.  I created the plan in my secret base also known as my bedroom.  It was there I would come up with an incredible idea to save earth. I knew all the answers to life were laid out in the book my mom read called The Black Cobra. Now that I look back at it, I don’t recall what the actual name of the book was; however, that is what I remember calling it. The Black Cobra was a book that I took from my mother, because in my eyes, she was brilliant, and I knew she got all her answers from it. While skimming through the pages, not understanding a single word, I got a magnificent idea. Evil alien Chuck would lose to my almighty idea of, wait for it... ding dong ditching his house and throwing my most prized possessions into his yard. I mean, everyone knows that to get rid of an evil alien, you must ring their door bell, afterwards running away and throwing toys in their yard. It is simple knowledge, especially to a curly-haired three-year-old girl.

I started forming a plan from my miraculous idea. The plan started the very next day. I got up early, 7:30 on a Saturday morning, to be exact. You know a child means business when they get up early on a Saturday. It was going to be a long day of throwing toys into his yard, ding dong ditching his house, and figuring out his evil alien plans. I needed energy. I needed Fruit Loops! I ran to the kitchen, grabbed a bowl, and made my Fruit Loops. When I was almost done, my dad walked out of his room and went straight to the couch where he fell back to sleep. He was strange like that.  He’d wander the house for a few minutes then usually crash on the couch, and wake the dead with his snoring. 

I finally finished my Fruit Loops. I went to the front door, and went outside to see if evil alien Chuck was yelling at his garden. When I got outside, I saw my arch nemeses evil alien Chuck yelling at his garden, and the worst part was he saw me! He waved! What was I going to do? My cover was blown! Thank goodness I didn’t have any of my most prized possessions to throw in his yard. Then he would know my real agenda. I turned around and ran to my secret base as fast as I could. I couldn’t let evil alien Chuck catch me.

At my secret base I went over everything that just happened, even down to the last Fruit Loop I ate. As I was going over my plan, I saw the fatal flaw: I was supposed to go through the back door, not the front! I revised my plan and gathered all of my toys, otherwise known as my most prized possessions.  I tip toed toward the back door, leading to one of the most terrifying adventures a freckled faced red head could face.  My dad was still snoring, and it sounded like he’d placed an amplifier on his mouth.  I made my way like a ninja across our backyard.  I remember I even did some rolls like a ninja, and the kicking motion.  I finally made it to evil alien Chuck’s fence.  I slowly surveyed his backyard, and no one was in sight to stop my plan on saving earth. I threw my toys into his yard with all my might, every last one of them. Then, I ran to his front door and rang the doorbell over and over again until I heard footsteps. My heart was racing.  I knew I was foiling his plans.  As the doorknob turned, I jumped off of his front step and ran to my house. I repeated this process throughout the day, making sure I wasn’t seen so I wouldn’t get caught by evil alien Chuck.

It was around supper time, and I was throwing my toys into evil alien Chuck’s backyard when I overheard him talking to my dad about going to the store to buy things for repairs on his house, otherwise known as his spaceship.  He told my dad he kept finding my toys in his backyard, and that’s when I knew something bad was going to happen. Before I knew it, my dad and evil alien Chuck were standing before me. They took in the scene around them of toys sporadically placed on Chuck’s yard and my pile of toys waiting to be thrown on my yard. My dad gave me one of his best “I am seriously mad at you looks”.  He started apologizing to evil alien Chuck while I just stood there with my mouth gaping.  I just couldn’t figure out how on earth my dad could not spot that our neighbor was an alien.  My actions were for a good cause. I mean, saving the earth is a good cause, right?

    Throughout my time living in that house, I made sure evil alien Chuck would not be able to wreak havoc and send his evil alien brethren to destroy Earth. Until my pretty vivid imagination showed me that Chuck wasn’t really an evil alien he was just a very strange person.