Lying In This Bed

-Lying In This Bed-
by
Keaton Foster



Lying in this bed
A world above my head
Spinning, shifting madness
Below my back
A solid foundation, cracked
In between is where I exist
Beyond is where I dare not go
Existing and living
Polar opposites in every regard
I am here on earth, doing time
A prison of the senses enshrined
A cage for an unhindered mind
I am not like you
I am not like anyone else
Of God’s fractured image I was created
Enslaved into being and not meant to be
Existing within the same paradine
Confusing feelings fill my chest
Emptiness races out with each breath
All else are perfect, while I am vastly flawed
All else have a chance, while I do not
I am mistake, a broken boy from the get
Now I have become a damaged man
Doing what he can, what he must
Without regret, acts of formidable sin
Speaking out against the sun and the sky
Pointing up, wondering what if
As all others hold their hand
Close to their impossible to defeat hearts
So strongly they all believe
So powerful is their faith that it overcomes
While mine, certainly does not
Lying in this bed
I see more than most, more than I should
I am not afraid to step, upon shaky ground
I am not afraid to wander out beyond my skin
I fear no creator, no master of plans
I only fear myself and what I am capable of
Certainly when I die, I will pay dearly
For my potent inability to believe
But for now, life, the obstacle that divides
Is the only concern that burdens my soul
What will I do, where will I go
How will I know, and if I know
Will it make any damn difference
Lying in this bed, pondering many things
Madness to some, brilliance to others
To me, a seemingly innocuous stream of ideas
Concepts and nonsense to be pondered
Some of what I have penned
May mean something, but not until
My life has long since expired
So for now, lying in this bed
I will do what I can, to deal
To understand, and to confess
If not for everyone, then for myself
I am content being such a monster of a man
I am content with my gift, turned cursed
I have only one purpose, one finite meaning
And I am aware, that belief plays no part
In what I am here to do…


Lying In This Bed
Written by Keaton Foster Copyright © 2012.