Detroit Drugs

“Life is very interesting …. In the end some of your greatest pains, Become your greatest strengths” – Drew Barrymore

“Yeah we should sell more drugs man, More!” replied Eddy.  “We’re getting all the money we need for the cars and we could buy about 20 boats!” “Yeah, but don’t you want like a mansion?” I said.

“Yes, but the more we get the more we have to hide”, stated Eddy. “Well, you know what that means?” Then, “Right”, I said. “What?”, “We need to get better drugs in smaller proportions dude… Like cocaine” I said. “Cocaine…… no”, Eddy said! “Why c’mon, listen, it would be easy”…. Is all that my mom heard.  She was in the other room drinking a Diet Coke Cola that we had bought awhile back. She knew what we were doing.  She’d known for 2 weeks after I had come home talking secretly to Eddy on a walkie talkie. When I said “no one will buy it in that small of proportion”, I knew she’d heard. I just didn’t think she’d know so easily. Now I’m on this island praying that if I would have just gotten a normal job and loved my Mother as she loved me. “But, I will take you back and tell you what happened. Here goes nothing!” After hearing that, my mom waited until Eddy had went home and was getting into bed. She said “Marko, are you dealing drugs?” Her face twisted with sadness and her eyes tearing up just looking at me. And course I said “no”. Why would you admit that? My mother, after it all, looks like she’d break down right there. She said “if anything ever happens to you, I just want you to know I love you.” I never cared what my mother said to me, but this struck me hard. I thought all night on what had been going through her mind or for sure what’s going through mine!

The next morning at 6am, my brother Jose asked where mom would be if we didn’t go school. Jose was suspended for fighting and overall, I thought it was dumb. I said I didn’t know, but we couldn’t call her because we didn’t have cell phones. “Maybe she’s at the store”, replied Jose. “Maybe”, I said. I had a feeling it was because of last night’s fight. I just hoped nothing happened to her. Then Jose said “I’m going to Tommy’s house.” He’d go there to get cigarettes and alcohol. “I will be back at 9:00.” He said. I didn’t reply. It didn’t matter if he’d go or not. I was selfish.  All I cared about was myself. So I sat on the couch waiting for Eddy to say “morning dude,” then tell me about some stupid dream he had about being a Nascar driver. Surely enough, there it was. “Morning dude!” He rambled on for 2 minutes or so then said “yeah man, I talked to Gunter. He’s got the cocaine.” I almost dropped the walkie talkie. I listened with my jaw dropped to the floor for 10 more minutes. Then he said “We have to get them at 11:00am today!” Sure enough, I said “yes, of course.” I hung up and jotted around the apartment for about 4 hours. Finally, 11:00 had arrived and I was so hyped. I ran down to the docks while all the people in the storage units were looking at me and cussing things I would never repeat. When I got there, there was a submarine sitting there waiting. A large man named Gunter was standing there in a gray and black jacket with the word Southpole on it. He stepped out of the submarine and pushed me, saying “where is it you little pri**”. Jose said “Here, here.” We’d just paid him 200 bucks. “Thank You.” replied Gunter. “It’s in the back. Go in don’t touch anything.  Take four bags and you’re out.” I started to shake. We’d gone in and taken it and Eddy said “Hey we should take just two more bags.”  Just because 200 was a lot and he gave so little. “No!” I shouted. “That guy out there would have our necks!” “Yeah, but we’d be making bank. Besides, he won’t even know.” “C’mon, we don’t even know him.” said Eddy. “Fine.” I said. We had taken it and gone home.

Later that night I was with Eddy counting around 600 dollars that we’d made just from two pounds of cocaine. Something struck me about last night that I’d brought up to Eddy. I said “Eddy, what do you think if we died doing this?” “I don’t know man, why do you say that?” said Eddy. I reply “wells my mo.., never mind man.” “So, how much money we got?” I said. He gave me a really weird look. “Well, about $600.” I already knew. I just wanted him off that subject. I guess it worked. At 3:00, my mother had come home. I still wasn’t home, Jose was though. I’d gotten a call saying “Marko, there are people here asking for you.” I’d taken the walkie talkie and said “yeah!” In a deep broad voice on the other end, I heard a deeper voice saying “I’m gunna kill em. Without it,Wheres it at!” I quickly replied “what sir?” “Hey man, you there?” I’d recognized that voice. It was that of GUNTER! All I heard were screams and gunshots. I’d just killed my family. It was like slow motion. I dropped the walkie talkie. It broke, shattering into pieces as soon as it hit the ground. I repeated again “I’D JUST KILLED MY FAMILY!” A couple weeks of living with Eddy got me thinking everyday what had happened and how I could have stopped it. I would almost go for full days crying myself to sleep.

That day, a man came to our door saying “I’m looking for a Marko.” “That’s me sir.” I said. My eyes were so dried and my mouth was almost as if I could grow cacti in it. Nevertheless, he replied saying things like “We’re very sorry.” I didn’t care much for a man who doesn’t even know me, but somewhere in the sentence I heard the words “living with your grandma” and “you will be flying out to Hawaii Sunday”. My grandma has always lived there, but I never visited her because we never could afford it. The next day when I’d said goodbye to my friends, adults, teachers and Detroit itself,  I headed off to Hawaii. Sitting in the worst seat money could buy, I would never ever thought about using my drug money. It was too big of a risk, but I see some familiar faces with me. It was a girl named Jayna and a guy named Doug.  Jayna was from my school and Doug was from our rival school. I didn’t care. I never played many sports. Then I heard the flight attendant say we are now flying over the ocean to Hawaii. Every once in awhile Jayna or Doug glanced at me. Jayna turned back and said “Marko, right?”  “Yes” I replied. She said “I’m sorry to hear about the loss of your family in the tragic car accident.” Accident, I said to myself.  That must be what’s going around. Inside, I was furious that my family was dead and people were making up different stories. So, Jayna said “Where are you going anyways?” I said “Hawaii, aren’t you too?” I said. “No.” she said. “I’m going out of country for my church’s youth group.” “Oh that’s cool” I said, and I turned back around. Yes, it was rude, but I’m sure she understood. I looked out the window and saw only blue, blue everything. It was all oceans for as far as the eye could see. Then I heard the flight attendant say they were having some minor problems and to please remain calm. Then, the pilot came on for at least for 3 seconds with “a I think we’re going dow….” Then we were cut off.

Everyone was mostly shaky and then there was a loud ringing. I hadn’t realized it yet, but we’d just crashed and my leg felt like it was slashed with a sword! My vision was blurry. Nothing would stand still. When I looked around, most people were dead or on fire while running for the water. Most were hurt bad. The plane’s wing was in the water. The rest was nowhere to be found. Moving my leg hurt like shoving a needle in my eye. The sharp pain was the most uncomfortable feeling I had ever felt. Then I heard “Doug, Doug! Help my Doug.” Doug was lying covered in blood, twitching, with his mother hovering over him. I will never forget that image. It will be forever stuck in my brain. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw. Doug was laying there along with everyone who died in this short period of time. What else could go wrong in my life?  Then, Doug said “Mom.. please kill me!” I thought to myself,  how could a mother do that to her own son? Then, she did the complete unexpected and killed herself.  Doug then laid back and stopped breathing. He just died. I couldn’t feel my leg, my eyes were teary and my face felt like it had been run over by a truck.

My ears then started to ring and when I looked behind me, a part of plane came flying at me. Then it smacked me right in the face. I’d been knocked out for 5 days. I woke up starving and so thirsty. If I didn’t have water that very minute, I’d die. Luckily, a girl took water and splashed it on my face. I drank the dripping water from my face and practically begged for more. When I was fully awake, I had realized that girl was Jayna and she had been helping make sure I didn’t die. I owed it to her. She’d bandaged my leg and stitched up a few cuts. It had been around 4 years since that very day. Jayna has since passed of illness. I haven’t found out and I’d been sitting on this rock talking to myself for hours. But, then I heard them “They’re here, they’re here!” I said. “Helicopters, they’re here! What where’d they go?” I said. I tried looking for hours. Eventually, I gave up. I began thinking I was going crazy. Then I heard it again “There he is, right there”! A women’s voice said “mom.” I said to myself , I am beginning to feel dizzy and very thirsty. Then I passed out on the ground. I was awaken in a helicopter with a young lady hovering over my head softly saying.

“Is your name Marko” she said in a relaxing tone. I had almost forgotten my name, but then I replied “yes, yes it is.” “Amazing Chris, he’s our guy.” “This is the one.” she said, much louder than before.

Then a dark curly haired man with a wrinkled thermal shirt on and some skinny jeans smiled. “I knew it was” said Chris. They’d bandaged me up and identified my closest relatives. Unluckily for me, there were no more. Grandma had passed away. It seems she passed away months after I’d crashed.  There was only one place I had wanted to go at a time like this; The place where it all began and where it soon will end, Gunter’s home (wherever that stupid coke head lived). Sure enough, we were in Detroit by the time I knew it. I stepped off the plane and into the hospital, where I’d be held for 6 days. I couldn’t do that or afford it. I had too much hatred and so much revenge in my small little heart. I stepped out of the hospital half naked with IV’s in my butt. It didn’t matter, I had stolen a surgery knife from the doctor’s office, hijacked a car and made my way to Gunters house. As I got there, I knew there was no turning back and I knew it. I broke down the door and saw two kids sitting next to a dog and a cat. Pushing them aside, I had made my way to Gunters room. I saw him. He was getting ready for somewhat of a special event.



“I suppose you’re going to kill me now, aren’t you?” he said, without turning around.

I replied with nothing, only hatred. I leapt at him with full force. He had no reaction. He stood still as I threw him to the ground and screaming whatever was on my mind from that day. Then, all in that moment, that one action, I had stabbed him. He smiled as blood covered his lips and body. I began to think about the family he had and his future, then thought of mine. The only thing I could think of was prison or running from the police. His on the other hand, was love and forgiveness. It’s like my revenge wasn’t worth it, but his life to me wasn’t ether. I wondered what to do now. I guess wait, and that’s what I did. And now I was out of prison at October 9th 2021.