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Rated: 18+ · Chapter · Fanfiction · #1893533
Hanz arrives in ponyville, and is greeted by the local one-pony welcome wagon.
                                                    Demon(s)

It was my first day in Ponyville, I had just gotten off the train and gotten my bags and birdcage off, walking out of the doors when... I was greeted by this adorable pink earth pony with perfectly straight hair, all brushed to one side who had a very happy, if disturbing attitude, she was wearing a large black bow in her mane and had black party balloons as her cutie mark.  "Hi there, my name is Pinkamena!  I... kinda greet all the new ponies who come into this town!" Of course, I was shy and nervous because I had never been here before, and the country seems so very different from back home, so I tried my best to smile and I held out my hoof "H-hi there, ma'am, it’s nice to meet you, m-my name is Hanz Von Stickyhooves" She seemed delighted that I was willing to talk to her, or at least I think she was, because she gave me a big, friendly hug and had a bit of a grin "Stickyhooves? What a unique name!  Since your new here, how about I show you around town?" And before I could even reply she took my hoof in hers and started dragging me out of the train station to town square. Luckily I managed to drag my belongings and my eagle in his cage with me, showing me to various vendors and stores and all sorts of buildings in town, and along the way, I noticed the oddest thing: A small, strange foreign pony like me who was working at a Turnip stand.

This town reminded me very much of a cheerier, more innocent version of my home town, Hoofenstein.

"Erm...Mrs Pinkie?  If you don’t mind me calling you Pinkie, that is.... I do enjoy this town so far, though I am quite peckish after the long train ride over here.  Would you know where we could get a bite to eat?" I asked her, and she had kept giving out the names of the various places, until we arrived at a bakery.  "Why, this is the perfect place to eat, Sugarcube Corner!  I happen to work and live here, ya know? In fact, just the other day I got some new ingredients for some special cupcakes, would you like to try them?!" She said as she hopped up and down happily, and I saw no reason to turn down a free meal, so I agreed. "S-sure Mrs. Pinkie, I would love to try them!"

I smiled happily and went into the store where we were greeted by two ponies who seemed to be nervous, yet greeted us with a friendly smile "Oh, don’t mind those two, that’s just Mr. and Mrs. cake, I work for them and rent out their basement." Pinkie sat me down at the table and told me she would be just a minute, and she then headed down into the basement to get her ingredients. She then went into the kitchen and took quite a long time cooking them, so I talked to Mr. and Mrs. Cake, and got them to rent me their spare room upstairs so that I could store my belongings and my pet. As I was walking back down the stairs, Pinkie then came out with a fresh-baked batch of Rainbow-colored cupcakes, and handed me one, which I took and sniffed it at first, then took a big bite. "Mmmn, this is simply Dashing, Mrs. Pinkie!  What’s in it?"  She replied "Ohhhhh, nothin much, I just had a little help from a friend."

Her eye twitched a little as she said that and she had somewhat of a creepy look, but I didn’t think much of it. "So, what brings a foreign pony like yourself to Ponyville, Hanz? And what does your strange cutie mark mean?" she asked, and I chewed the bite of cupcake I had and swallowed.  "W-well, you see, Back in Hoofenstein, I was the owner of the biggest government-funded Glue factor in my country. But we kinda ran into....erm.... Supply issues, and I had to close my business because of it.  I’m now ambassador for the country of Hoofenstein....but I would love to be a business owner again as well" She seemed a little shocked yet delighted at the same time when she learned I owned a glue factory and wouldn’t mind starting a new one, so she pulled up a chair.

"Welllllll, I happen to know a place you could buy to start a new glue factory! And not only that, but I could supply you. You won’t be able to find anyone else who can or would supply you." She said with a wink, which made me look concerned, but I agreed to let her be my supplier, and even stranger was that she didn’t want any kind of payment for it.  She showed me to the factory, and the next day I bought the deed to it from the mayor, who understandably wanted to know why a foreigner wanted to buy an old factory in her town, but I paid her a little extra to not ask questions.

And so, after I got the factory up and running, I started having problems from the get-go..... Sadly, I could not find any customers who would buy my glue, nor could I find any pony who was willing to work for me, so I had to do all the work myself..... Luckily, Pinkamena kept giving me a generous supply of ingredients with which to make my finished product. 
But, in the end, ironically this time what failed my company was not the supply end, but the demand. And within only a few months, I had to close down my factory and sell it back to the mayor at a loss, leaving me with 200,000 of the 300,000 I came here with.

It would seem like I kept getting lucky breaks though, because despite my business failing, Pinkie somehow talked the Cakes into not only hiring me to work at their bakery with her, but she also got them to sell me the basement she had been renting from them for quite a good deal."Y...you can’t be honest, can you, Mr. and Mrs. cake?....Y...your selling me your basement for only 15 bits?!" But Mr. Cake replied with "Y-yes, 15 bits is all we ask, j-just take it, please? We will even give you a job working the register!" So I accepted and bought the basement because it was much larger than the cramped room I was currently staying in, plus it was a great deal, after all. An hour after I bought the basement and was hired, Pinkie confronted me: "Soooooo, since I talked them into being so generous and helped you so much over the months.... do you think I could share the basement with you, Hanz?" And after thinking about it, I nodded "Sure, I dont see why not, Pinkie. you’ve been such a great friend and business partner!" So now I had a steady job, a place to live, and a very close friend who I shared the basement with, Pinkamena. Life in Ponyville was going quite well, if rather boring. 

After a few weeks of sharing the basement with Pinkamena, I started to get curious about where she seemed to disappear to each night after I fell asleep, so I asked her about it at bedtime. "P...pinkie? C-can I ask you something?" She smiled calmly and nodded, brushing her mane in the mirror "Sure, Hanz, ask me anything!" So I took a deep breath and asked "W-where is it that you keep going to after I fall asleep? I’m very curious, and thought that since we are friends, we shouldn’t keep secrets from each other." Immediately after asking that, her eyes opened wide and she looked a little nervous, biting her lip "Well....I suppose since we live together, it’s only fair that you know now...." So she reached under her bed and pressed a switch, making the western wall slide back and revealing a long hallway lit by torches, and I nervously walked into it. "Whoa! W....what’s back here?"

She grabbed a scalpel and hid it without me noticing, keeping it with her just in case I freaked out.  "Ohhhhhh, nothing really, just keep on heading down the hall and I’ll be right behind you!" And so I walked down the hall until I reached a heavy iron door, which pinkie opened up with a heavy key, and we walked in, where she shut the door behind us and locked it to be safe......and then she flipped the light switch on, revealing what all normal ponies would consider to be completely horrifying: Organs and intestines blown full of air and hung like Christmas decorations on the walls, with a large storage freezer, a metal table with many steel straps on it for restraining her subjects, with a dead, mutilated blue unicorn wearing a dark blue magicians hat with stars on it, and a table near the larger one with surgical instruments of all types on it. The entire room, in short: A Bloody Mess

I stood there and took it all in for a moment, not freaking out or really seeming very phased by it at all. "Erm....this is quite an interesting Hobby you have here, Pinkie.... Have you been doing this for awhile?" I turned to look at her and she was looking at me with a look of shock and amazement at the fact that I’m not scared "Y-....you mean you’re not afraid, Hanz?!" she said, her eyes wide open.  "You forget that I was the owner of a glue factory, pinkie.  This is all quite normal to me!" I laughed a little and her face seemed to light up happily, and she went to put on her coat made of other ponies cutie marks while hopping happily "Yay! Yay! You’re the only pony who hasn’t freaked out or tried to run!" She glomped me and hugged me tight and happily, so tight that I couldn’t help but cough.

C-cant...B-breath!" I laughed and hugged her back, and she loosened up the hug, looking down at me with a smile and I blushed, sensing that she must like me now "T...this may be kinda sudden....B-but... I’m a single mare.... and if you happen to be a single Stallion too....would you like to....p-perhaps...g-go on a date?!" I blushed deeply and smiled, nodding shyly "Y...yes, I’m a single Stallion and I.....I accept." Her eyes lit up and she hopped up and down happily before knocking me over again and giving me a kiss on the cheek "Well.... Would you like to lay down now for bed, Pinkie? It’s rather late and we both have a lot to do tomorrow after work.  We could even go on our first date, if you’re not too busy with her?" We both looked over at the dead unicorn bound on the table and she shook her head with a giggle "Hehe, Trixie is fine where she is.  I’ll just put her in the freezer, you head on to bed and I’ll be right with you, cutey!" I smiled and blushed, nodding and helping Pinkie put Trixie in the freezer, then we headed out, locked the door behind us, and we pushed our beds together, falling asleep quickly.

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