She came to my living room window. Her name was Coco because she was a pigeon. I fell in love with her from the first sight. For a few days I have been hearing the cooing of a pigeon, apparently she has been around for a few days now deciding on whether or not to nest on my window. When she finally made that decision and started gathering straws for the nest I felt happy and special and no matter how childish I might sound, but I really love this pigeon and I decided her name will be Coco. I was surprised of how jealous I felt when her mate came a while ago to bring her food and more straws; I just wanted him to fly away. I spent a lot of time looking at her and whenever I entered the room I would check on her first then go about my business. I wanted very much to offer her food or water but that might scare her away. She is going to be fine without my help. Very soon she will lay her eggs and a few more days she will leave. She will probably never come to this window again but that’s totally ok with me, I mean even if she did come back I won’t be here for long anyway. I am leaving too. I feel happy to see her lying here peacefully, as if trying to tell me that everything will be fine. As if trying to say”don’t worry life will go on” I hope it does go on for all the people I love, I hope they get over it fast. You are the last one to see me alive Coco, that’s why I write this letter to thank you. I have finally made up my mind and reached my decision too. I decided that life needs sacrifice, that people need examples, that losers lose so that winners win. My luck just happened to fall on the downward side of the hill and kept rolling down the slope, my problems kept snow-balling until I finally came to the bottom. And for many who had never been to the bottom and probably never will, I must tell you it’s really cool here. But also cruel and lonely and very dark, but how could there be a bottom without people living there? We are the unfortunate bottom definers. Isn’t it a great feeling when you go by a beggar or a homeless person every day on your way to work and back - sometimes leaving an extra buck and sometimes too busy thinking about your work and life - isn’t it cool to feel “thank god I am not him” even if it was subconscious? Isn’t it cool to be able to accept your package, even though you know that it is miles away from where you wanted to end up? Anyways what I finally figured out is that we all end up in the same place, and for the first time in a very long time I am excited to lead again, I am going to head there years before my class mates. So thank you Coco for opening my eyes and for trusting me, you don’t get any of this as you are busy laying your eggs but you meant a lot to me. I only wish people could have trusted me too. The End. |