First five paragraphs

Kelly slowly opened her eyes. It was most definitely day time, though the exact hour was elusive. Fully clothed, Kelly crawled out from underneath the blanket that someone had draped over her and surveyed the mess that was her lounge.

There had been a party, that much was sure - something big and moving, most likely, though Kelly couldn't for the life of her remember much of it. She scanned the most breakable things, of which there were very few, making sure that nothing too important had been broken. The standby light on her TV was still there, so they hadn't demolished that at least, but shards of pottery suggested that a couple of small figurines had met their end.

Sighing, Kelly set about cleaning up the mess, shovelling empty beer cans and pre-mix bottles into a black plastic bin bag that then went outside with all the other bin bags, to lie in state, waiting for a future where rubbish was again collected for free.

Catching sight of herself in the mirror, she cringed at how wild and unruly her long, dyed black hair looked, vowing never to fall asleep on the couch in future. For now it would have to stay that way, for she had driven herself into being motivated to clean, and taking a break to comb her hair would just be procrastination of the highest order.

Next Kelly emptied the ashtray, hoping beyond hope that there would be an unfinished joint somewhere, but fate chose this moment to deny her such a nicety, and there wasn't one - not even the smallest roach. This was extremely surprising, as basically everyone Kelly knew smoked weed, though with the scarceness of good weed and the glut of cannabis oil people were now smoking their roaches until not even ash remained.