Im a quiet person

I am feeling taciturn. It happens.
I have always had reservations on speeking with people, or putting in my input. Im a very quiet person by nature. Sure I've had friends in my life, and my family who loved me and cared for me. Although, recently my conversation with family or friends have seized or at least slowed down.

See it started a few years back, I've been a bit antisocial my whole life. But in recent years its been worst. I've been staying in my room more and more, and not communicating with the real world as much.

My brother came to visit me once and asked why I do what I do. I really dont have an answer for him other than, It seemed right at the time. Im not a good speaker, and certainly not a good public speaker. So it kills me when I have to give interviews about myself or my life.

I'm not really a famous man, Some people know who I am. but I still dont have much dialogue for people, and frankly people are confused by me. I think sometimes people are confusing to me. My own family is confused by me.

I live a basic life, I sleep 6 hours a night and eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Just your normal run of the mill man. I work as a janitor and love my job, I don't even have the chance to talk to many people, which is better for me and my personality.
I once had a girlfriend who would talk,talk and talk, It was a little annoying, but, she was a sweet, sweet girl. I ended up falling in love with her and marrying her. we didnt have any kids or anything, but, she was a great girl.

I remember as a kid, people use to make fun of me and how I talked, see I tend to slur alot of my letters. it took many years to fix that, and I still have a little bit of a slur, though now it just gives my words charachter. It took many years to overcome this, and im very proud of this.

I have a public speach coming up soon, and im trying to prepair for it. I have a rough draft of my speech, though its only a few sentences long, i think it really puts out there, who I am and what I do.

The biggest problem i have with public speaking or talking in groups, is people laughing at me. And people judging me. I really dont like it but My speech will address that. It will address many things people dont know about me or want to know, in just a few sentences. Or maybe a paragraph.

My speech:
I love my family and friends, and it comforts me that they are in a better place. Though it cant kill me that they died by my hands, I am certain that you all understand me and my reasons for killing them. The laughter would eat at me day in day out. I slayed my family and friends for the better good. Their blood runs through my body that once ran through their own. I feel no sorrow for what I did, as they had no sorrow for what they did. I now die in this chamber of death for the souls I have taken. I have no remource.

I have to give this speech in front of 12 people. Im kinda nervouse about it. I really dont like public speaking. I really dont have many friends either to help me on my speech.